Ok i have to get this off my chest. I have been seeing the same guy off and on for the past six months. I love him very much but i am only 17 and he is 19 so we havent taken very seriously. We decided a long time ago that we want to continue our relationship(seriously try at it) after we have each settled down. Recently we were hit with some big news. We were apart for approximately a month during which he was screwin a girl i go to school with. She really is sweet and there is no hard feelings. I have done shit like that before to. Well she is pregnant now...and I do not doubt that it is his. I do not know where this leaves me. I want to be there for him and i am trying my best. He says he wants me there that he needs me and he loves me and all this has him ready to grow up. I know a baby isnt such a bad thing but when it is your boyfriend and another girls baby...what do u do? She is 16 and he is 19....neither of them are stable enough to raise a child. He hasnt even finished highschool. I know he sounds like a real sack of shit but i am in love with him still. I am just so confused about where i should stand in this one. Do i stay with him or back off? Everything is going to change by the time the baby is born anyways i mean i will be going off to college and leaving all this behind. But i dont know if i should bail on him right now. I know he doesnt want to be with her. It was jus a lil fling but shit she needs support from him too. He looks for it in me and i am not sure that is such a good thing. I have no one to talk to about it because no one knows yet. I am sooo confused. Any advice would be great!
wow, thats a toughie i had a similar situation with a girl i used to date where im 2 years older and she got pregnant at 16 (after she started seeing a new guy)...she wanted me back but she tried to kiss me before she had broken up with her bf so i knew she wasnt worth it i don'tknow what to say...it's up to you to decide
This may sound kinda harsh, but I would just leave him and all of that behind and go on with your life, it's his mess and he made it, it's his problem, not yours. You are young and going somewhere in your life, you shouldn't be bogged down by the problems of two other people that were highly irresponsible. So unless you were planning on spending the rest of your life with this guy, it's just not worth it... He shouldn't be expecting you to share any of the burden of the mess HE made. You could be using that time to date some guys at college that are hopefully better for you. When that baby is born, it's going to be a part of his life whether he wants it to or not, and he's going to be heavily involved with this girl even if they have no feelings for each other, simply because they had a baby together. It would just make a bunch of hardships on you that you don't really need. Unless, of course... he pretty much stays completely out of the kids's life... personaly I'd not want to date a guy that did that. I know it seems hard and mean now... but later on you will be glad that you didn't slow your life down because of a mistake he made. I mean I could be wrong, you could totally be up for dealing with the sticky complicatiosn of a life involved with him, but most likely it wouldn't be worth it.. but it's up to you. Just my personal opinion and thoughts.
Yeeah! I agrees. But, did he cheat on you? If not, i think maybe give him a chance. Or KILL THE BABY! I kid. Babies are cool. Maybe, if she'll let you, you guys could raise it. Or you could leave him. Just my two cents.
Baby comes first. Personally, I say it's for your own good as well as that of the kid for you to back off for now. If you feel the need, then be there for him, help him through it, but don't get involved. this is THEIR kid and as shitty as it is to say they don't need any outside opinions right now. Besides, the guy sounds like a real jerk if one minute the two of you are going to try a long term relationship, but yet he turns around and gets another girl pregnant. And if you said you've done the same thing, then obviously your not ready for such a relationship either.....especially when there is a baby involved.
I would back off, too. She is going to need him to be there for her, and you don't want to get hurt. Just be glad you aren't the one pregnant. You need to be a 16 yr old!! Hang out with friends, date, normal teenage stuff. You don't need to be dealing with this stuff. Seriously. Let them work on the baby stuff. You need to focus on yourself. ps...don't get pregnant!!!Please use protection if you continue to be with this guy (or any others).
No he didnt cheat on me we were broke up. Thanks for all the advice and i know it is probably best for me to back off but he doesnt have anyone else to talk to it about and this girl is extremely sweet but it wasnt like it is with me and him. We have a close friendship and I dunno how to jus be the friend he needs. We talk about everything and he says i am the only person he can really trust. I worry bout him her and the kid. And i am extremely glad it isnt me. But i never had any intentions of voicing my opinion. And if i did it would be the same as his. i dunno still confused....
