whoa. touch me more plz

So I left my wife and son at home and take my daughter to a mall to spend some of the christmas money we both acquired. You know how in the middle of the isles there are stands that sell things? Well some bangin ass french broad wearing a short mini skirt and sexy shoes pulls me aside and started her sales pitch for the lotion and nail file she was promoting. I think the shit is called obeyyourbody. She was explaining how it worked then asked if I'd like a sample. C'mon now yall ... I was like hell jeeeeeah - and I say that nodding my head up and down...hahah.
So this chick grabs my thumb in the most sexiest manner ever and at first starts rubbing some of the almond lotion on it like it was my fucking cock. In the middle of stroking my thumb, she asked me "are you married?" I'm like yeah. She says good, your wife will love this stuff. I'm thinking, not after I tell her this.

So my daughter is pulling my other arm saying "daddy can we go now" and the french chick whips out her nail file. She went from the rough side to the most softest side and then put cuticle oil on me. Of course she rubbed that on like it was a cock also. I'm thinking to myself, if my daughter wasn't here, I'd probably spring a woody. So after looking at my pretty finished nail, I asked how much the package was. She sat down at her register, flung her skirt up showing even more leg and told me $40. The look on my face said oh hell naw, so she said since I was such a charming young man, she'd slice that price in half.

So here I sit with my nail file and lotion feeling all feminine.

 

Dude... I so get you.

 

Ha, I can't believe you purshased that shit! I wouldn't pay $20 for a finger smoke

 

At 26 that would have so worked on me - you do grow out of it though I am not sure if that is a good thing or a bad thing. 6 years ago, she would have had your $40 (Grin)

 

You can actually get your cock smoked for less than $20 (not that I would)

 

I got stopped by one of those people too, selling body lotions and creams, it wasn't quite as sexual as your experince, she noticed I had psoriasis between my fingers and she was like 'try this dead sea salt wash nothings been proven better for helping with psoriasis'
then i found out it was £25 for a jar and she was like 'you've only got one skin'
and I thought 'you silly cow we shed our skin so thats not true, for a start, do you think i'm made of money £25 pounds before xmas'

happyhippy after typing this ive realised how not exciting it is compared to yours but never mind eh
she directed me in washing my hands don't think i was touched once, maybe thats why she didn't get a sale
S

 

That's a cute story, very funny and congrats on you new soft smelling girly hands d:

 

um a wife.... okay you didnt write that

 

okay maybe you did
in that case

i have nothing to say. *cough* liar *cough*

 

well yeah trish i did. i'm not with her for financial gain.

okay. i'm done. don't start. just don't.

 

blah blah. yeah dont start cause im not in the mood at all mike.

 

cute. you just reminded me why i love being single; i don't have to worry about some broad hitting on my man; lol. But hey, she did make a sale off of you, didn't she? And how do you know she didn't jack the price up, then jack it back down to make you think you were getting a deal? (This has been done to me before. )

 

Could be, although I really doubt he cares about that.

 

LMAO...yeah, yeah. The whole men are from mars women are from Venus thing. Yeah, I'm sure it flattered him. Honestly, I might have been flattered too.

 

awww how cute.

 

Ha


So all it takes is some suggestive rubbing to get men to buy products?


Hot description though.

 

Well with me, all it takes is a wink, or a nod, or even just eye contact. I'm such a pushover.

 

Desperate?

 

Starving.

 

D'oh!!! Time to EAT!!!!!!

Later dudes...