Post all your dumbass friends' stupid stoner stories. Anything they did that made you go "what the fuck....?" is probably acceptable, But you should probably check with Skip cuz I have no idea what the fuck is going on here anymore.
A friend was stoned off his ass and decided he should hit the bong..... anally. He put it on the table, turned around, pulled down his pants, and stuck his anus over the bong. I was just sitting there in awe, I didn't know what the fuck he was doing. I wanted to smack him, but considering it was just a cheap acryllic I just gave him the bong. He'll never live that one down, though. Another time we were listening to some rather loud music, and had it paused to go get something to drink. We came back and forgot we were listening to anything, so we started watching TV. I rememberd, and without telling my friend I turned it back on, causing him to shit his pants in a stoned stupor and throw his drink. That guy must have some sort of anal fixation or something, it seems all the stories with him involve his ass.
no one would put their anal opening on the mouth of a bong--that's retarded; i don't care how high you are. surely he knew that he couldn't breathe in through his asshole??
haha this one young chick that goes to my school ...shes one of those preppy's you know? ...well shes all goody good but im a known stoner round my school..im the class clown and shit..everyone knows me as being like a stoner and a clown...but she came up to me one day and was like "hey would you get me high if i gave you 5 bucks?" and i was like..."wait...you mean i get to smoke it with you and i get paid? hell yea ill get you high"....so she came over the next day and we pulled up a couple chairs in my garage...and i got my bong out..and shes like..."how do you use that? ive only smoked joints before... and a bowl once.." i was like..."so youve smoked out of a bowl?" and she said yea...so i took out my old bowl (R.I.P. Captain)...and i packed it and i took a hit first(even though shes payin its still my bud lol)...and then she went to smoke it..and didnt hold the carb...she started coughing...and i was like "you get a hit?" and i laughed at it...and she goes yeaaaaa...and i just rolled my eyes...she blew out a measley amount of smoke...then the next time she 'took a hit' she coughed when the bowl was still in her mouth...blew the weed everywheree...at this point i was just pissed off cuz it was getting pathetic that she didnt know how to use it and coughed it everywhere...so i picked up the bud...and put it in a little baggie and handed it to her and was like "alright have fun gettin high"...lol booted her ass right out the door i know that aint THAT stupid of a story...but it just reminded me of how stupid it was for her to say she knows how to use a bowl...and shes kind of a bitch..but hey ...i got 5 bucks!
One time, while my mom was in chicago, my dad went to RI for the day... I had like 5 friends over, and another kid who was smoking us up untill we got our quarter. After smoking a bong load, this kid blows into the bong soaking everything inside. That part isnt THAT stupid, but theres more: later, most of my friends had left cause my dad was getting home soon. two were left crashed on the couches in my living room. one of them goes to the bathroom and throws up, this sound causes my friend brian to get naseaus (spelling?). He goes to the bathroom and throws up in the sink, thinking hes throwing up in the toilet. He left without alerting me that he hadnt cleaned the throwup out of the sink. Later my dad get home, goes to the bathroom, and goes "Beetle, get in here". I go in and see the sink is FILLED with diluted puke. "We're you drinking?" "no....uh...Brian...ate alot of food....threw up...." probably the worst excuse ever.
thats a good story lol..like the bongwater part..my friend did that when he was drunk thinking it was a bowl and he could blow the weed out...lol...water went all over his carpet so i laughed...but that story reminded me of last month my WHOLE family went to wisconson to see my g-parents...and i didnt go...so i had like at least 16 people over in one day...all just to smoke...i had a h/o....and my friend brice had like a quarter of nugs...it was good...so i had my bong my bowl and nate had his bowl and papers and we were all just smokin and passing(there were like 6 of us at this time) and then my friend jared lol...well lets just say he rolled up the joint...a fatty...and set it on my dads work bench..and we kept smoking (savin the joint for later) and well we went inside and watched tv and raided the kitchen for munchies...like 3 hours later everyone left...except me and nate who were still glued to the tv after smoking about a quarter total in a sitting between us 6 that were there...well after everyone had left...me and nate were only on a slight buzz...i had some bud left but i still needed it to last me...and nate was like did we ever smoke that joint that j-rod rolled? and i was like uh...no? and hes looked at me and just had the biggest grin...we walked out to the garage hoping it was there..and SHA-BAM...we look down and its right there...(imagine a light shining down on a nice fat joint lol thats how it felt) so we sat down and this is like a 3g joint..quite a few papers...and we smoked it from end to end and packed the roach into the bowl...it was great..cuz it was brices weed that he rolled up in to that...THANK YOU BRICE!!! hahaha
Dude, yeah. I was like, walking home with my friends after getting high and my friend really had the munchies. So she crosses the street trying to get food and all of a sudden, out of nowhere, this huge, silver minivan comes out of nowhere and it almost wipes her out! So the only sober kid saw this and he flipped out and pulled her out of the street and onto the sidewalk and she almost fell over. Yeah, that kid was so angry after that.. cause she almost died. I guess we all learnt a lesson that day: Running into on-coming traffic is counter productive.
One of my buddies always has a cigarette tucked behind his ear. One night we were going to a concert and had gotten ripped in his truck before we got there. Well we get out and start walking and I'm like what's that smell? He was so high that he had put his LIT cigarette behind his ear and his hair was singeing!
