Would You Sign This Pre-Booty Call Agreement???

Booty call contract

The Pre-Booty Call Agreement

This pre-booty call Agreement (hereinafter referred to as "The Agreement") is entered into on this ___day of ______________, 20 __, by ____________________, (hereinafter referred to as the "Participant") between ____________________, (hereinafter referred to as the "Holder of 'The Agreement'") and ____________________ (Participant). This Agreement shall cover the following rules and principles for the Participant: 1. No sleeping over!! Unless it is very good and we need to repeat it in the morning. 2. No meeting in public except for dinner or drinks before the events of the evening. 3. No calls before 9 pm. We don't have anything to talk about. 4. None of that "lovemaking" stuff, only mind-blowing sex allowed. 5. No emotional discussions!! i.e. where are we heading with this? Do you love me? The answer is "no", so don't even ask. 6. No plans made in advance. That is why you are called "the backup." Unless you are from out-of-town, then it's only a one-time advanced arrangement. 7. All gifts accepted- money is always good. 8. No baby talk- however, dirty talk is encouraged. 9. No asking for comparisons with former lovers it's really none of your damn business. 10. No calling each other friends with privileges. We are not friends, just sex buddies. 11. Calling out the wrong name during sex is OK. Don't be offended, you mean no less to me than you did before. 12. No extra clothing!! I don't want your ass leaving anything behind when you leave. 13. No falling asleep right after sex!! It's over so get your ass up and go home. 14. Don't be offended if I don't ask if you enjoyed it. I don't care!! 15. You cannot borrow my car for any reason. 16. If anyone of the opposite sex asks who you are, the standard response will be "My roommates girlfriend/boyfriend." 17. Doggie style preferred. Just hit it hard and right or get the Hell out! (Reason: The less eye contact the better. I don't want to look at you.) 18. We are to hook up absolutely whenever the mood strikes me, so stop calling! 19. Bring your own drink-I am not your liquor store. 20. No phone use, please! I don't want anyone calling back looking for your ass. *Extra tip for successful booty calls: The holder of the Agreement may only alter the aforementioned rules. If the other party attempts to change or alter any terms of the Agreement, it will automatically become null and void. The Participant will then be removed from the "Possible Future Relationship List" and given minimal Booty Call privileges, and cut off from any communications unless first initiated by the holder of this Agreement. If further violations of the Agreement occur the Participant will be deleted from phone memory, email list, and blocked from all communications until the Participant's silly ass understands the rules.

Participant:

Signature: ____________________

Date: ____________________

Holder of the "Agreement":

Signature: ____________________

Date: ____________________

 

Hell no! I require much more then just a booty call....I have a vibrator. Why would I need a "booty call" ? I need dinner, flowers, romance, committment the whole nine yards....

 

haha. yeah. it woulda been nice to have this when i was single. there were some times when i didn't want a cuddle, i just wanted some sex, then i wanted to leave. no harm done, no emotional connection. just some relief.

 

I don't operate this way. Either I'm in a relationship with the guy and I want the whole thing or when I get lonely I find a guy friend that I know and trust and have some fun. If a guy handed that to me and didn't tell me he was joking, I'd be highly offended. I personally find that rather derogatory and disrespectful. After all, we are human beings.

 

Pretty funny, I hope no one takes this serious, even though it does talk about attitudes that people have... but come on, with all the really cruel acts people commit in the world, using a person purely for sex and treating them mean isn't nothing to wince at when we got people torturing, murdering, raping, abusing, etc. etc.

 

I don't just have sex to have sex. That was described so cold like. That would be like having sex with a robot that looked and felt human. I couldn't get myself around that. I have sex because I connect with a person and either want them in a sexual manner or want them as a partner. Either way there is still some amount of love in the act even if I'm not in love.

Sex should always have some amount of caring behind it. We all deserve at least that.

 

I have no problems with booty calls, but I don't like a lot of the details/rules listed in this thinger. Plus, signing a contract for sex? As if that'd happen when it's just casual booty calls

 

well, now, let's not assume this is from a man to a woman, either. i was pretty cut and dried about my sex.

 

Sorry, but I wouldn't eve read all that!

 

I agree with this statement. (except, I don't have a vibrator... sigh)
Call me old fashioned....

 

where do I sign lol.

 

where do i sign lol.

 

Where's the rest of it?

The "if you gets pregnant, I don't wanna know about it, it's your responsibility and there will be no child support expected or abortions paid for"

and

"both parties warrant that they are free of disease"

By the way "the holder of this agrees to change the rules at any time" - Nope, that nullifies any contract.

 

Man, a casual booty call has to be brought into ink and paper? Crap...not so casual anymore, eh? Oh well, what am I worried about? Booty calls have never been my thing anywho. Very amusing, though.

 

Well, considering she's asking for "gifts" especially money, it seems to me to be a prostitution agreement.

 

I would, i especially like that part about ALWAYS using protection. Be smart and strap it up people!


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Did you write that up yourself?!?! Someone has far too much time on their hands for sure...