what do you mamas think of my situation?

alright, so me and my boyfriend have been going out for about.... 9 and a half months... we have sex maybe... once a month or so, and its always with a condom. im so freakin' paranoid about getting pregnant though, so we usually only do anal sex, and he always pulls out. but i am not against the idea of vagina sex though, im so paranoid though.

i know i SHOULD go be on birth control, but im just nervous about it. i dont want it to show up on my parents' health insurance... could i just go to like an adolecent center? because we have both that, and a women's center in my town. which birth control method is the most reliable? do i have to take it at the EXACT same time everyday? During the school year, that wont be hard, because i'll be up at the same time everyday (early). but weekends, i like to sleep in, so i wont be up to take my pill. so will i have to set an alarm or something to take it at the same time as the weekdays?

i get so worried all the time around my period because im so paranoid, and it sucks! so i figure if i go on birth control, i can stop worrying. but, if im on birth control, do we have to use a condom?

bleh, i dont really know what im trying to say here... i just kinda want your guys' opinons. im pretty sure all of this has been said before.... but i wanted to make a new thread...

thanks so much... i'm just kinda overwhelmed.

 

First off, useing a condom and birth control is best. It makes the contraseptives more effective in a sense.

And if you dont use a condom and he "pulls out" before he cums....Honey that's a load of shit.

 

Sweetie, Go on the pill. Still use a condom though. Im the same way. Im always nervous around the time of my period even though I use both a condom and the pill. But. An go to a Clinic. There has to be some form of Planned Parenthood near you. If you go the a clinic they will bill you on a sliding scale (dont use your parents insurance) if you make almost nothing you pay almost nothing. My annual costs me 90 bucks and the pills are about 10 a month so its really inexpensive. But get on the pill.

 

i don`t know your age ..but how come you have already anal-sex but don`t know if you have to use a condom if you`re on the pil?
if you have the age to have sex it`s about time you ask your parents for a docters-consult
i don`t think your parents wants to see you pregnant

i`m not trying to be a nasty mum here but i have 2 daughters so i know what i`m talking about
i had my first daugther when i was 17
i serieusly don`t want that for them
(excuse my bad englisch)

 

Firstly anal sex has NO chance of pregnancy as the tube leads to a diferent area as you know, so pulling out them you dont have to worry about.


and now comes my rant on america!!

WHY DONT THEY TEACH YOU THIS STUFF!!?!?!? birth control and contraception is some of THE most importante things young people should learn about. i learnt it at 15!! and that was a bit too late for me. If you KNOW about contraception and choose to ignore what you know (the misstake i made) thats one thing but if you dont know all together thats a different house on a hill!!

There are MANY forms of contraception, many different types of pill. The ydont need to be taken EXACTLY the same time every day but your supposed to take it around the same time, maybe half hour or hours leniance. That might vary with differnet pills. now IF the pill is working (aka your taking it properly) there shouldnt b any chance of you getting pregnant as it ALTERS your natural homonal balence, Preventing you from ovulating untill you do on the 7 days of pills which alow you to ovulate (+ have your period)

you can also get a three months worth injection which means you dont need to take a pill daily.

the coil is medically inserted but again its a longer lasting contraception.

do me a favour and look up contraception on line.

Condoms are the only thing which prevents STD's however they aren't 100% fool proof. Ive have a few of them break on me in the past and they make me sore down there after.


tell me something what kind of sex ed do you guys get over there in school?

 

Yes you still have to use a condom. ALWAYS USE A CONDOM!!! So many people have STDs these days, it is scary. HPV, herpes, AIDS!!! If you don't know all the facts about sex, you shouldn't be doing it!!!

 

Maybe is you are so paranoid and dont know enough about birthcontrol...this may be a subtle hint that you are not ready to be having an active sexual relationship...

 

okey dokey fleesy got it totally right, there is sooo many threads about contracption and im sorry but they are mainly american girls like 15 + in england we get taught loads from where u put it - to how to put a condom on. but peacelovebarefoot use a condom, and its fair enough if u wanna have anal sex but its not always good for u but go and get on the pill or the injection, if u think u cant find anyone go to ur favourite teacher at school, maybe a nurse there, anyone as i dont know the rules and things for insurance, of course you could try talking to ur mum or dad, they might be happier as u are talking to them, but it depends on ur age, good luck xxx

 

i said i ALWAYS use a condom. i just wasnt sure if i had to use one while on the pill because the pill prevents pregnancies, so why would i need TWO forms of contraception? and yes, i know that the condom can prevent STDs. we both got tested a couple of months ago, and we both came up clean.

Fleassy, i will describe the sex ed class i had at 14. we would enter the classroom, the teacher (the football coach) would shout "sit down and shut up!", so we would. we would pull out our books, and do the questions at the end of each chapter, and turn them in. we watched a video of a woman giving birth. no discussions, no hands on activities, no demonstrations on how to put on a condom, nothing. it really sucked, and i learned basically nothing.

i know this. i am just so paranoid that i make him pull out, so i can be SURE. yeah, im a loser.

well, my boyfriend and i have been discussing birth control and all of that for a while, and i think we are going to go to the adolencent center, and see what they have to say.

im going to look in the coil thing, although it seems kinda scary. does anyone know where i can find some information on this? maybe print it out and bring it with me? how long does it last? months? a year? or years?

thanks so much ladies. im really glad hipforums has a forum that can give such support.

 

"Because abstinance is the only way"

Guy: "My girlfriend and I practice abstinance, and we're happy"

 

Because we have this unfortunate plague of ignorant conservative "christians" (who act nothing like what I've heard this Christ character was like), who think that educating children will just give them ideas they shouldn't be having. They're so bloody brilliant, they think that cutting off federal funding for programs like Planned Parenthood (because they provide abortions, albeit nowhere near as many abortions as contraceptives), expecting that to actually reduce the demand for abortions... Or maybe they (being such good "christians") feel that any woman willing to have an abortions should die a nasty death from a back-alley abortion..... Or maybe they feel that any woman willing to have premarital sex deserves such a fate... God forbid they allow Planned Parenthood to help to prevent those unwanted pregnancies in the first place!

(sorry for the rant!)

As for the original poster, since you've replied that you've decided to go to a clinic, I don't have much to offer. The doc (or nurse) there will have tons of info -- this is their specialty, as opposed to a general practitioner who may not be as up-to-date on all of the options. The most important thing is to discuss all of your concerns -- timing of the pill (I've heard it can be anytime within a 3 hour window, but I'm not certain), side effects of different options, etc. They will have heard anything you can think of to ask, and a lot worse, so don't be shy!

 

I know you said you always use a condom, but I think it would be a good idea to keep using it even if you are on another method. You're still in school (HS or college?) and things happen. You just can't be too careful.

 

Okay, to the original poster:

Going to a planned parenthood clinic or an adolescent center is a very good idea. They will have tons of information on everything from Birth control to venereal diseases. However, I also have to agree with some of what was said above. If you're not totally educated on the issues surrounding sexual activity, are you mature and responsible enough to be engaging in it? I was well-versed in all of the information surrounding sexual activity and I STILL abstained until I was 18. I wanted to be fully ready for that responsibility.
You might also want to research the pros and cons of anal sex. I'm sure there are negatives to that situation as well as the fact that it's probably not all that enjoyable for a female. In a sexual relationship, you should be enjoying yourselves equally. Are you?

As far as what Fleassy asked:

Dawn_Sky said it best. Our country has been over-run with puritanical and over-zealous bigots that believe that their way is the right and only way to do things. Sex is not to be discussed in school, on any level. In my elementary school, when we got the "You're becoming a woman" talk, girls only saw the girl video and guys only saw the guy video. You're not supposed to know what's going to happen to the other sex.
Our society and government has decided that it's the parent's responsibility to discuss these rather important, life-altering experiences with children. However, at the same time, they're regulating every other aspect of parenting. Most parents aren't well enough equipped with sexual knowledge to educate their children. How can the uneducated teach? Not possible.

My sexual-education happened when I was 15 and consisted of a teacher standing at the front of the classroom explaining to us that bad things happen can happen when you have sex and so you shouldn't do it until you're married. She was legally bound not to discuss condoms or birth control with us. That would be advocating sexual activity.

This is actually my biggest issue with the United States. We've been in the midst of a sexual revolution since the turn of the LAST century. However, our government is still practising the antiquated and puritanical laws that were in position in the late 1800s. We're lucky to have gotten so far as to have planned parenthood clinics.

I actually am involved with a group that is trying to preserve what rights we have and fighting for more...VOX...or the voices of planned parenthood....

Everyone should google it and get involved. This is ridiculous.

 

wow i never knew the states where that bad for sex education, here we had hours and hours of it, even maybe to much, it didnt help alot of people who i went to school with though cause some of them has kids and std's. i thought america would be better for sex education than england ohh well

 

We had health class, but I actually learned more in my Biology class. At least he had us reveiw forms of birth control. So far, from school, I have learned all the diseases you can get from sex, kissing and holding hands, how abstinence is the best form of birth control, and I think we *may* have covered condoms, but not how you put them on. Everything I have learned has come from Sex Ed sites. My friend, who goes to a Catholic school, knows nothing.

 

My sex ed consisted of listening to the radio show Loveline. Seriously. We had abstinence teaching which consisted of a teacher filling up a plastic baggy with olive oil and tossing it around class while it leaked all over the place, saying that it showed the effectiveness of a condom. If I hadn't listened to Loveline, I would never have thought to go online and look stuff up.