i m 22, from a country in Aisa where gay, bi things are really a big problem. I've lived a confusing life for years, trying to cheat myself, cheat others. I dont think i could tell my parents someday about my sexual orientation. Luckily, I have a very good friend, i told him my secret. He used to be a man who hated those gay things. Being my friend for a long time,after knowing my secret, he understands and cheers me up. He s straight, anyway.He suggested me to have sex with some girls to find out the real me, because i'm still very confused. I still hope that i was a straight man coz gaylife at my place is so damn hard.I wish i could live a normal gaylife, being myself, but those days still seem to be so far away. I think about the gay/straight questions all day, day by day...I am so tired of myself.. I 've never had sex before..I just wanna ask if there are any gay men here, who have had sex with women, how did u feel??!! Did u get an erection? I intend to have sex with a girl, but i am so afraid that my penis will not listen to me, he may not get an erection when i try to have sex with a girl. I hope to get some reply from any of you. Hope you can understand my English, its not good now, i am still working on it. My MSN address: wadaler@hotmail.com. I'd love to talk to anyone of you to get some more precious experiences.
Greetings wadaler, Your English is quite good. I used to teach English as a second language, so I know how difficult English can be for people. I haven't had sex with women because I never had any desire to have sex with women. I don't think you should have sex with a woman just to make yourself straight. It won't work. Some gay men have sex with women and even marry them, and it often causes lots of pain and problems for both the man and the woman. You probably already know the real you already. It would be a better idea to meet gay men in your own country.
Hello Wadaler, The experiences that we choose to have in our lives can have as much influence and impact upon us as we allow them to. Like Sage Dreamer, I too have never had sex with a woman. My need to conform has never been synchronous or in harmony with those who live around me either. Of course, I am 46 in 2005. When I was 22 it was 1981 and I was in Europe for a year, studying German, travelling and learning how to hold onto what little money I ever had in my wallet. It is impossible for someone else to tell you how to live, whom to befriend, with whom you should or should not have sex. I also don't think that someone from the other side of the planet could give you totally helpful advice because your culture, social pressures and day-to-day existence might be totally different from what goes on here. I work in an office in which the majority of the employees are gay. In other parts of America that is very unusual. Whatever your choice, I wish you good luck and happiness on the road of life.
I can't really help you if you're asking for advice from gay males. But, I can tell you that, as a transgender who is bisexual, giving sex from the male's role is very undesirable when it comes to women. But, that is mostly because I don't identify as a male; I don't like being reminded of the biological mix-up either.
Im in South Korea teaching, in Asia its almost impossible to get support when you come out, and there is an incredible amount of pressure from society to get married here. OP we sont know your family life, so we cant give you advice on what to do, what you have to do is build a circle of friends, friends will get you through any tough time you have with you family if you decide to come out. Also check out this website www.utopia-asia.com it will give you some info and support groups in your country, where-ever that may be. Good luck
Thank you very much for replying me. The most difficult problem I had to face was to accept myself as a gay, I think i've done with it. I feel much less presure on me now. Im a gay!!! I wanna shout it out loud. The only reason that keeps me from doing it is my mother, i dont want to hurt her. I know she would never stand that. At my place, there is no gay groups or community as far as i know. This forum has been a the place where i can be myself totally. I still have a problem communicating with people, esp with men. I dont feel comfortable while talking to them, esp when i find that the one i m talking to is very attractive and mature. Do you guys have the same problem? How do u solve that? I m trying to find someone to be with. I think a serious relationship could solve my "communication problem", dont u think? Once again, thank you for replying me!! Happy being a member of this forum!!
