My biggest problem: I'm paranoid. Very paranoid! And you know what else is wrong with me? - I'm spiteful (well, it depends, actually) - I'm touchy - I'm stubborn - I worry too much all the time about stuff that doesn't matter or I worry for other people (not about them, but I worry instead of them) - I'm empathic and when someone who I love feels bad, I feel bad, only 2 times worse, in short, I dependant and hyper-sensitive - I get tired of stuff very easily and I have a nostalgia problem too... which is kinda contradictory, isn't it? It it isn't... I don't know. And what's wrong with you?
hey at least your open about it. were all paranoid self-conscious deluded crazies in this world if you ask me.
Once I went to a friend's house out in the middle of nowhere to get high in his basement: there was me, my boyfriend (Nick), my sister Marie who came for winter break and my friend - well he's not a friend anymore but that's another story - Jay. I smoked some weed, and drank some rum w/ coke. At first, I was having a good time, laughing and all. But then Jay put on some really aggressive music, some stupid punk band singing - screaming - words like "PAY THE FUCKING RENT PAY THE FUCKING RENT" and "LET ME PUT MY DICK IN YOU" and worse stuff, real bad. So I started to get really paranoid. I asked him to turn off the music. But it got worse after that. I started to realize I was in a basement, that there were no neighbors... that there were towels over the windows (why??), that Jay had a psycho face... I started to breathe real fast, Jay asked very calmly - too calmly - if he could do something to help me, if I wanted coffee, I said yes. He went upstairs to make some. The noise - the coffee maker - seemed like a chainsaw motor to me. I told Nick and Marie that I wanted to leave, go to the hospital (!), that Jay was gonna kill us all... when he came back downstairs, with the coffee, I looked at him real scared... he goes: "hey... it's okay, Laety, it's just me, Jason!" and I screamed like crazy, yelled I needed to call the cops!! I felt like I was in a horror movie, seriously. Plus it was an old house and it was cracking so much, and stoned it seemed like an earthquake was going on... I called Jay a psycho, asked him a million questions about his life, totally FREAKED OUT it was INSANE. In the end, he took us home, he was really pissed, obviously... lol I was really embarassed the next day. I kept calling him and wrote him a letter and all, I guess alcohol + pot + agressive music isn't at all for me! But don't worry, I'm a pretty normal girl in my normal state
its so funny but every big thing ive been paranoid about i ended up right-since i was a kid. but i get paranoid about the stuppiedest things when im high and ill like obsess over the littlest things
Nick just reminded me of another problem I have: my head's in the clouds too much! Like I sometimes don't even hear it when people talk to me... I dream a lot... or worry a lot, depending on my mood of the day - cause I can turn into a completely different person when I'm in a bad mood...
