women are ambivalent

I have heard women are ambivalent and few know what they want, and even when they do it rarely serves them. Women don't know what they want.... anybody agree with me on this one.

 

no

 

i think it is unfair to categorize women this way. i know plenty of men who don't know what they want...i also know plenty who only want sex..is it fair to say that all men only want sex and nothing more? maybe...who knows? but i don't think anyone truly knows what they want until they have experienced everything, and can form opinions from that. therefore i don't think anyone truly knows what they want...except for love in one form or another

 

Its not a woman thing...its a people thing. Both genders are guilty. Some are and some aren't. Lots of people are like that, manymanymany!

 

This has to do with when a guy wants to approach a girl

 

i dont think women in general are like that at all, but im haveing a problem exactly like that

 

Approach them where, in what social setting? Are these girls to already know socially?

 

We can pretend otherwise if we all like, but there ARE big differences between the sexes.....particularly when it comes to attraction to men....and the sort of men. The crucial difference being women have far less control than they like to imagine.


Men - initially - are drawn by looks. Initially. Logic also enters the male arena, however, and men do find women attractive on levels beyond the physical, although that is the 'hook' that turns a man's head to begin with.

Women throw logic out the window, consistently and frequently, when it comes to attraction to men. Looks are not that important, money isn't that important, what IS important is for a man to stand out who isn't annoying and boring. A man can be kind, considerate, have a great job, be tall and pretty good looking and a woman will mess him around mercilessly if she detects what she considers a 'weakness'. Namely, 9 times out of 10, this means he's 'too' nice. Women consider nice men wusses, but often vehemently deny this fact.... even to themselves. Far more importantly, once a woman considers (dismisses) you as a nice guy, that's it.....game over.....

Women also hate the fact that a lot of 'nice' men know this, they like to call such men 'lovely', 'sweet' and like to give the impression that this man is attractive to them because women like men as 'friends'. They do not like it at all when the occassional 'nice' guy realises he isn't going to get anywhere by buying gifts, dinners, being considerate, kind etc etc......the way men are often brought up to treat women by their Mothers!

Many, many women 'pretend' to find nice men 'attractive'. They don't. Oh, sure, they may have a lot of 'affection' for a good man, but they find a man who doesn't hand control to them (ie 'consideration 'in men's speak), who doesn't hang around them all the time, who has his own life, who isn't needy, and is quite ambivalent and confident and - magic of magical qualitites; COCKY, totally irrisistable.

Now, sadly, for the nice guys...AND many women.....assholes, bastards have these qualities in spades. Indeed, so much so, that women often find themselves hopelessly attracted even though they KNOW the guy is an asshole, and all her friends tell her he's an asshole. Attraction for the vast majority of women is not an option.

I have a very simple test for any nice guys out there who normally treat women with the sort of kind considerate thoughtfulness that Mom would approve of. Try - for a few days - being awkward, blunt, abivalent, selfish, arrogant, and COCKY with some women you know. AT first they will be appalled, and try to convince you to be 'nice' again, but then try it with new women you meet, who never knew you as a nice guy in the first place.

Women are wonderful, often, but they take no prisoners. Some of the cruellest people I have ever come across in my life, bar one, have ALL been women. The gentle sex?

 

nobody knows what they want

 

i know what I want..
some men, children, and animals dont know what they want...

 

I agree with Silver Salamander. Society tries to tell guys to be the nice guy, and then guys assume u get nowhere unless u are a jerk. The thing is dont always give in to what a woman wants. Women will test guys to see if they supplicate, and if they do they are out the door. Women want a guy to call them on there bullshit. Nice guys are too focused on the qualities in the woman, and dont do that. What works is to be a challenge. If a woman likes u a little bit and u don't show so much interest in her, then she has to work harder to get u.

 

I have these Ultimate confidence and audio tapes, as well as a tool to build in a state of ferociousness, thoroughness, clarity and playfullness which is all the 4 best qualities u can have when u are trying to pick up on a woman. If you seem to serious that is a total turn off. You cant try to attract women when u view them as a task, but instead have a playful attitude, and dont even seem like u have to win, make sense SILVER???

 

women want different things just like men want different things...we're not all the same ya know

 

O jeeze!! Thats like saying every guy just goes for the hot looking chick, and is willing to eat a mile of her shit just to see where it comes from! I watch guys put up with crap and act the fool, falling all over themselves for the chick with the right look. So should I say all guys are shallow dumbasses because of this? There is physical clues to whether shes interested or not. Discovery channel had a great piece on it and a play by play showing all a the lil signs.

 

Quite. However, men are simply not good at picking up 'signs' or 'signals', which naturally exasperates women, BUT women never stop to think they could maybe, just maybe, make these signs or signals into plain english. Call it a male flaw, by all means, but men ARE hopeless at picking up 'vibes', 'signs' and 'signals'. Yes, a lot of men ARE shallow clowns who moon over hot looking babes who often have nothing else going for them but their looks.

BUT, I don't know a single man who is attracted to a woman simply because she acts like an asshole or treats him with indifference. Women, though, eat this up when a man behaves this way to them.

Women catergorize men into 2 groups, and 2 groups only; men they will sleep with, ie they are ATTRACTED to, and men they want as friends, ie they are NOT attracted to.

Men can have women as friends, feel attraction to them, would sleep with them if the opportunity arose, consider them as much an equal friend as some of their male buddies, and put themselves on the line for them as much as they would for a lover.

Most women - though I appreciate there do exist the odd exception - consider men 'friends' as very much lesser than a lover, a female friend, a step down, a demotion. 'Let's just be friends' from a woman always creases me up, because women like to believe men are fooled into considering this as equally good a thing as a woman saying 'get your pants off, boy!'

Sadly, a lot of men are fooled by this, usually the nice, wussy ones many women have as friends. These men think that given time, they will show this woman how wonderful they are BY being nice and kind, considerate, buying her gifts, remembering her birthday, being there for her when Mr Asshole has gone out bowling or something else that has her in tears, and that she will suddenly come to her senses and say, 'THAT'S the man for me!, this kind, sweet, nice man I have taken for granted all this time'....but, of course, they never do. But, the nice guys don't know this do they, girls? And you take full advantage of this, don't you girls?

I think, all things considered, men and women are equally flawed....and equally wonderful.

 

I know plenty a guys that go after the bitches! They seem to like the challenge, the trophy. PEOPLE use body language, not just women. There is back and forth subconcious things people do when they are around each other in all situations. I Know of lots of guys that just wanna be friends after they managed to get their conquest or change attention to a bigger better prize. I still would not assume to lump all men in the pile because so many are jackasses. Sorry not fond of gender bashing from either side. By the way, there is a section of people between doormat and jerk/asshole. kind giving peeps that can also assert themselves.

Male friends sometimes do get the shit end of the stick when a woman id in a relationship, I will agree. Usually because the woman gets thrown between a (sometimes suddenly) jealous, insecure boyfriend and her friend and trying to juggle the situation til (hopefully) the bf figures out theres not a threat. I been guilty of that till I realized things weren't gonna change and mutually broke things off. Luckily for me, most times my friends knew what I was going thru in those situations and they were indeed true lifetime friends

But I've never played alla those bs games so maybe I'm cutting too much slack for both genders. I've never had any dalliances that ended up as lets be friends, I've had friends that were very close though when the need or mood stuck us was occationally more depending on BOTH of our relationship situations.

Both genders can be total shits and idiots and clueless about what they want. How it comes out may be a bit different but it still boils down the same. LMAO!! I hear alotta guys complain how they can't find anyone and how lonely they are (talking about my age group) and how they want a quality woman that is intelligent ect., then I watch them chasing down young women my daughters age. Seems to me what they mean is " I want a 40yr old woman in a 20yr old body" Maybe they need to lower their standard a few notches or get a reality check when they look in the mirror.

ok...realized now I'm rambling...only one cuppa coffee, need more. Grateful for my guy in CO. He is an amazing guy and doesn't look like some beauty and doesn't have to for me to appreciate him.

 

I agree with Silver to some point, i don't think you have to be an asshole though, the reason alot of nice guys fuck up is they eat a womans bullshit instead of calling her on it. I have heard women will use excuses/etc..as a test to see if you will let her get away with it then if you do then you are out of there. Women will also purposely not call u when they say they will or when you are going to call them only 25% of the time they will answer, sound like a coincidence?????

Too bad highschool/college doesnt teach you stuff like this about women.

Society teaches u what u probably shouldnt be doing if ya ask me.

 

Guys do the exact same thing! Not female exclusivity.

 

"women don't know what they want" heh... stupid thought. never generalize shit , it sounds like crap

 

Its not generalizing its the truth, most of them don't know what they want, and even if they do it rarely serves them. Women are ambivalent and uncertain, thats why they need a man.