neither one of us is very experienced, but she is still a virgin. every time we try and have sex it hurts her too much to even get it in half way. i guess she is just super sensitive. we've tried many things including lube, but it just doesnt help enough. i'm worried that its going to hurt her every time, and by the look on her face i cant possibly keep pushing when i can see how badly it hurts her. shes been almost in tears before. we are in love and both want this badly, but its just NOT working. any advice would be appreciated.
You say you've tried lube, but I would certainly recommend trying it again. Make sure she's full aroused and relaxed. Don't rush things, take your time and make it less of a goal and more of an experience. Finger her until you suspect you could attempt penetration. Then, go for it. Understand that if she's a virgin, there's a good chance that no matter what, it's going to hurt. The breaking of the hymen can be incredibly painful for some and completely unnoticed by others. Help her to understand that it's a one kind of pain that doesn't last long. Another option would be to slowly desensitize her with lots of fingering and partial penetrations over a period of time. It will take time, though, and patience. But, that truly is unnecessary in most cases. However, if she's in a ridiculous amount of pain, it could be a sign of a health concern or infection. I'd recommend her seeing a gynocologist if it's that extreme.
thanks for the reply. i know that shes totally healthy, its not an infection or anything like that, i think its more a matter of geometry. shes a lot shorter than i am. im afraid that its always going to hurt, because i was under the impression that the first time only hurts because of the hymen being broken. we arent even getting that far. she jokes that it feels like im stabbing her, if thats any indication. we go reaally slow and get right to a certain point where it would really take some pushing to get past. sigh... we cant be the only couple whos ever had this problem.. can we??
me too, but obviously i forgot most of it.. stupid math and stuff. i guess i'll check back later tonight or tomorrow for any advice. i'm sure someone on here can help!! i'm not gonna get discouraged. i will try that fingering idea, thanks again.
.... its cos shes nervous... so if you try... dont make a big deal out of it if it doesnt go to plan, because she'll probably be embarrassed about it and really cautious the next time you try to have sex. I'm sure she wants to please you as much as you do her
Sounds like your girl just isn't relaxed enough. Work on the foreplay side of things, tease the fuck outta her and then she'll be begging for it.
I am reeealy sensitive down there too. Lubrication helps alot... make sure u have enough...also, make sure she is horny enough. make sure she is relaxed. it also might help if she is on top the first time... I still start out on top because then i am in control and know if it hurts me.. so personally I think it is better for the girl to start out on top..
Well, basically, it's gonna hurt no matter what. The first full time's gonna be excruciating the way you describe her. It's sweet that you want to make it as painless as possible, but keep in mind it'll take a few tries before it doesn't hurt anymore. Like everyone else has said, make sure she's relaxed (as one can be, losing your virginity's nervewracking), ready (use a lot of foreplay), and try lube.
her height has nothing to do with it. if you have a large penis, that'll make a difference, but a woman's height, weight, hips etc--none of those have anything to do with the dimensions of her vagina. that's just every woman's secret
I've been married for 2 1/2 years and we still cannot get it in....dont feel bad....and yes I have lots of patience. SH'e 26 BTW. She wont go to the Gyno cause she's scared. That person that said to just ram it home....you're an ass. And buddy, good luck trying to convince her to let you do that. It will look like she got raped cause she will tense up really bad. And if you do ram her and it doesn't work, you'll wish you never did it cause she will be in extreme pain!!
im an ass? I was simplying saying that if it never happens most likely the hymen just needs to be broke, and how else can you do it then push it in further you my friend, are the ass
sounds like she's just too worried and not relaxed enough. i doubt it's 'geometry'. take it slowly, it may be easier if she has a few drinks... never let her feel like 'the time has come and it is now'... and use lots of lube all the time.
