Why do (some) Guys do that?

Ok this is what I would like to know...... why is it that some guys think thats it is ok to hit a women ....( who is agressing them ) and some guys are strickly in the I would rather die catagory, does it have to do with your mothers or fathers or is it just something your born with....



and here is why I ask......

This beautiful women is my sister in-law, Dana and she is one of the most easy going people... fun, funny, nice... she would do anything for anyone...


and this is what happened..... Dana and I had gone down to the local bars and then to a friends apartment after. at some point that evening we had met this guy and he seemed real cool to me.. he came from the area that I was raised and he had a daughter.. we talked for awhile and then he and his friend walked us to her car.. aparently I had too much to drink and this guy was helping me and getting a little too close while he was doing it. Dana told him that I was married and I started to walk away.. not thinking that any thing was going to happen, and when I turned around and came back (from 25 feet or so thru this parking lot) the cops were already there and Dana was holding her face... apperently the cops had been driving by and they saw Dana getting kicked by this guy... when they pulled up he ran and later turned himself in to a different cop... stating that he had just slapped her because she was pushing him....... Dana does admit to pushing him... alot , but still did that give him the right to hit her , and does that really look like an open hand slap....

 

i cant read past that picture. itll make me sick and wanna bash someone.

ive been pissed enuf lately and arrrrr

 

Zero tolerance, what happened to her is a disgrace. More than this though, it makes guys like those who would never do such a thing feel real shame in being men (But not as individuals). Personally I know it's a cliche but I really honestly and truly believe it begins with parenting.

Ben

 

ok ok, now I am not ok with beating. HOWEVER women should not think they will not be treated roughly if they pick a fight with a man. I am not going to say she deserved it because there is a difference between pushing and balling up a fist and slugging. For every action there is a reaction.
THIS IN NO WAY CONSTITUTES ME ENCOURAGING DOMESTIC VIOLENCE.

 

and yeah, girls can and do inflict abuse too...

but no a push and a punch are NOT equal

 

however if I told the same story where I pushed a guy a lot and got a shiner from an obviously bigger and stronger man, I would probably be told I shoulda known better.

 

true- there is a bit of a double standard but typically i still think it's wrong to put your hands on someone smaller or weaker then you.

wrestling and boxing wise too.

 

Oh.. so I was thinking too... some of our friends are steaming and are talking like they want to beat his ass.... I think this is a normal feeling but it wouldn't help how do I explain that to a bunch of pisssed off guys .. and I've tried a few times but I get told to mind my business

 

I just think if your not willing to take a beating, dont pick a physical fight. she was defending her sister in-law's um, well her sister in-law. admirable, and its a damn shame that what happened, happened. I personally find it sadder that simply because she was drunk a stranger thought it was ok to to try and take advantage of her.

 

okay heres an update they just released the guy and called to let us know..... I hope I can keep the guys calm....

 

well, I got females friends that men have ...hit. we did the same thing. my opinion on this subject definitely varies on whom was victimized. my sister or my daughter in that situation, I will spend the rest of my life in prison..but thats just male thinking for you. we are far from perfect creatures.

 

thanks for that crummyrummy I have been feeling like a huge ass and I think I should definetly not ever let myself get that drunk again!!!!

 

you are lucky, you had a friend with you, who was willing to take a punch to defend your honor. That, is a friend. next time she moves, help her.

 

I am against all violence. Against women or men for any reason. What he did is completely unjustified in any way shape or form. As she had probably been drinking a little you can't blame her for not possesing the common sense at the time not to push around a drunk guy a lot bigger than her. And I would have forgiven him a little for the sam e reason except that later he said he'd slapped her, which judging by the picture is completely dishonest. It definitely starts when you are being raised. If you are brought up in a violently competitive lifestyle, you will probably end up being pro-violence. I'm pretty skeptical that would have much to do with this situation though, seeing as he was probably a little drunk. I've kinda been jumping to some conclusions here, so please tell me if some of my assumptions prove to be false. Arrrrghh! I just looked at my post and now I definitely have to edit it. It looks too cheery and matter-of-fact. I'm really sorry about what happened to Dana. It's just so sad when things like that happen. And then you think about what's going on in Iraq...IT MAKES ME F-ING MAD!!!!!!!There we go...I think I've vented enough frustration.

 

you are entitled to your opinions feelings and beliefs. I am not a devout pacifist so you and me will disagree often, but I admire people that can actually hold true to a pacifist constitution.

 

well that could be I don't know much about the guy but if I let myself prejudge him for being big and fit.. (plenty of muscles) then maybe I could make the assumtion that he was brought up to be competitive and maybe also that he was tought that women don't have much importance.. that does seem to happen alot here in the midwest in the usa not that I'm an expert

 

Very true

 

men are taught they need to score or they are less than men. I bet he would have bragged about raping you but will not brag about hitting a girl.

 

my father has always tried teaching me about war and the nessesity of it but I continue to disagree... I don't think that violence solves any thing except that feeling of frusteration and anger ( and I didn't mean just war I am against all violence )

 

I dunno what happened, and I'm definatly not sticking up for guy.

I wouldn't let a girls cousin shove me around just because she was unavilable though.

I'm not saying thats what happened or anything. Guy sounds like an asshole, and I certainly wouldn't punch a woman in the face.