I just found out that my dad and mom both cheat on eachother. this makes me so sad and disappointed in both of them. I dont think i can look at them the same. i had one view of them, now i feel that they are both dirty. i have never cheated and that is part of my values. i dont know what ot think. has anyone had to deal with this???
i dont know if my ex girlfriends parents cheated on each other but they waited until their kids were all grown up before divorcing even though it was painfully obvious that they could hardly stand each other and made a great effort to avoid each other. that was in 8th grade. 8 years later they are now divorced and their kids are off to college. I don't agree with it. I think the responsible thing to do is: A) go to some counseling and really try to work it out. B) if you find you don't love each other after help communicating and working on making things better then just divorce.
My parents are getting a divorce right now to because my mom cheated on my dad but when i was younger like 15 or 16 i caught my dad cheating on my mom and wow I didnt know what to do or think and i never told anyone except my sister because we knew our something was up between our parents they always fought and they cant stand to be around each other LIke Yogi was saying bout his g/f 's parents but my parents tried all the counseling crap and nothing worked but Yeah its a weird feeling and I look at my parents differnt because of it because You dont know how they really are if they cheat on each other do u know what i mean?
sometimes i wonder if my pops is cheating on my mom. she gained weight because of my bro and i and never managed to get rid of it. theyve been having serious problems lately..they tried counseling once, i dont think my dads up for it again...he doesnt seem like he wants to do anything but wallow in self pity..i dunno..i think its disgusting to cheat
My father cheated on my mother for a year before he finally admitted to her what he was doing. It devasted our entire family and nothing is the same anymore. He left for a while, then came back, and things were alright for a little...but emotions were just swept under the rug...and now things are just as shitty as they were. There's no love...they're both miserable...it all just sucks. Fucking cheating...I hate it!
There comes a point in our lives when we realize that our parents are human too. They aren't perfect. They have thoughts, ideas, needs, wants, desires, feelings, and faults, just like everyone else. Welcome to adulthood.
Ya, My mom and dad where married for 25 years!!!!! My skank of a mom cheated on my dad and then asked for a divorce. She had been cheating on him for 3 years!!!! My dad gave her the world and more but she still cheated with some asshole!!!! Oh well, I guess you have to go where ever make you happy. Needless to say I barley ever talk to my mom but talk to my dad every day.
if you consider cheating an adult thing to do, fine. but cheating destroys families. breaks people, damages the only people who would stand by your side in the most shittiest of times, and i dont look at my parents the same. i am married and could never hurt my husband in that way. he is my life, and i have given him everything my life, my soul, everything that makes me, me and my parents didn't think of eachother and throwing it all away to get off. if you cant be satisfied with sex in your relationship you are a failure. i see my parents as failures and what really sucks is that my dad was an asshole to me growing up. i cant even be around him......so fuck you....its not about being perfect...its about respect and thinking outside of yourself.....which not that many people can do....people who cheat are pigs in my eyes.....
I think he/shes talking about the realization that people have that their parents are people who have problems too.
You misunderstand me. I didn't say that cheating was an adult thing to do, I said "welcome to adulthood" meaning "welcome to the realization that parents are human beings". Children tend to put their parents on a pedestal. Idolizing them and not seeing their faults. Of course, the parents allow this, by not showing their faults to their children. But, for MOST people... There comes a time in our lives when we realize that our parents aren't the pure, god-like creatures that we have held them to be. Your parents are HUMAN BEINGS. They have faults. They aren't perfect. Was that "fuck you" directed at me??? Because if it was, I think it was grossly uncalled for. Thanks lizardman for knowing how to read.
Well, when my parents were married, to my knowledge, my mother never cheated on my father. I can recall arguments between the two of them, and my father accusing her of cheating, even apprehended while my mother was expecting my little sister, that she wasn't his (she is) My father was a very insecure person, and my mother, well, she didn't always make the best choices and lied to him about places she was at times and who she was with. But she says that she never cheated on my father, and I believe her. She isn't one of those people that can keep secrets at all, and eventually, she always spills it all out to me. We have always been more like friends than mother and daughter, which wasn't always the best thing. If she were to one day tell me that when my parents were married that she had cheated on my father, I could never look at her the same. Ever. My dad? I have never once worried about him doing that. He's one of the most loyal and honest people you'd ever want to meet, and would never cheat one someone. That's just not him. Anyway, when my parents divorced, my mother became involved in various relationships involving married men. Supposedly these men were either seperated or in the process of divorcing (haha, yeah, sure) but it really made me look at her in a different light. Not that I didn't still love her, but it hurt to see her being like that. I even told her that she was a home-wrecker, that she was only a mistress to these men. It didn't seem to phase her much. Oh, she cried, and gave me every excuse imaginable as to why she was doing what she did, the promises that had been made, but it literally made me sick. Then, while with some of these men, she cheated on them. There was always as an excuse as to why she did it, but to me, I never accepted any of them. Some of these men cheated on her. Many, many times, and she still put up with it. It has been a crazy roller coaster ride, and it still hurts to see that the woman I saw while growing up is not the woman she is now. Was she always that person, and was I simply blinded with innocence as a child? People change, yes, but I was always having proper morals pounded into my skull, yet I turn around and my mother is doing everything that she told me not to. {{{HUGS}}}
I am very sorry. I am just having a hard time dealing with this. I dont know how to react or think about this. I'm mad, but I'm not, and I am sicked, and i dont know how to put it......
Thank you for your apology. I appreciate that. I understand that this must be a great shock to you and I see that it is hard to deal with. You have other reasons for disliking your dad, and I'm sorry for that. But try to remember that your mom is still your mom. She still loves you and cares about you. And I'm sure she would never do anything to intentionally hurt you. With time, the pain will subside. Just try to keep an open mind and wish happiness for your folks. They raised you the best they could and your own strong sense of morals can speak for that. They deserve to be happy, even if it isn't with each other. And their actions with other partners does not reflect on their feelings for you. They got you raised and married, now it's their turn to focus on themselves. Drastic family changes are always difficult to deal with. But being open-minded and forgiving about what they are doing will only make things much easier for you.
People are animals and we have to control our urges b/c society has made it wrong for us to be with more than just one person. When it is really in our nature to A) if you're a man, spread your seeds as many and as far as you can spread them, as to keep your bloodlines going, and b) as a woman find someone to make us feel safe and protected and whatever it is we need as a woman. I think it varies. So its actually really common for people to cheat, I think many more than are caught or acknowledge it. I am sorry for you, but as you grow up and learn things about life, you realize it's not necessarily what people taught you it is.
Have they both discussed it and agreed to having an open relationship? If so I see no problem with it... it might be hard for you to accept because they're your parents, but they have sexual urges too. I can see why you'd be upset if they didn't discuss it however.
No, they are still married. My dad has too much pride to talk about problems. And they dont even know I found out. And no it is not an open marriage. If they found out that the other was doing this, they both would flip out. They both cheat but dont want the other one to find out.
