So my ex is really pissing me off. I don't know why I dated her but I guess I sorta felt sorry for her plus she was a friend. I mean, she was pretty, but not my type, gotta connect on personality too. But I could tell she liked me and I played hard to get until she asked me...well, I couldn't work up the balls to reject her so I said yes to see where things would go. things got a little better. when i kissed her I gave her goosebumps and she felt so happy..but something was wrong on my side. I was still thinkin of an ex...so when we had sex, it was okay, but not as special to me as it was to her. she saw it as a healing process 'cos she had been raped in the past. But me, i just couldn't get the ex who had broken my heart outta my mind. well, after a while, things ended between me and this girl. I could have dumped her but I waited for things to get to a mutual point to not break her heart. well, she is being mean and a real bitch, so I almost want to admit to her that sex was indeed, meaningless...but I am a caring person...so who knows...its been a confusing time, geting my heart broken than sorta just falling into a rebound relationship when I should have been single.
I am not sure what it says about you that you entertain the thought of hurting her more by telling her that all along, you didn't feel anything for her when you had sex with her. Whatever it is that it says about you, it's not good. All around, it sounds like you manipulated her and didn't play anything straight with her. You dated her despite not wanting to; you dated her out of pity; you had sex with her despite knowing you didn't care for her; you led her on the entire way. You should consider yourself lucky that she doesn't know how much you were fucking with her; she might be even more mean and bitchy if she knew what kind of asshole you had been to her all along... -Jeffrey
Don't tell her hon... if she's been raped, she's gone through enough shit for a lifetime. Just avoid her if she's being mean and bitchy to her, dont' get back at her by throwing any ounce of self-esteem and self-respect she may have gained back out the window. That's just cruel and uncalled for. Avoidance technique with ex's you don't particularly like anymore works best.
Wow Jeff, you really have it out for me! Whats your problem? Maybe I worded it a little wrong. I said we were friends to begin with...we were flirting...I was unsure of what to do but I wanted to see where things would go...whats wrong with that? I gave her a chance! Things worked for a while but sometimes people mistake feelings for one person when its for another. At the time, I thought they were feelings for her but later realized the feelings were for my ex. Even so, things were cool for a while after breakup. Maybe pity was the wrong word too, give me a break, this shit keeps me up into the night, I was tired...But I was interested to see where things would go...Most people here on campus and back home understood where I am coming from, although they had more to go on...Key word MORE. they saw the relationship. Than she started acting like a bitch, stealing my stuff especially... But I don't always know how to act and I certiannly don't need assholes 13 years older (but certiannly not 13 years wiser) telling me that I am an asshole when I am trying to figure out what to do. You came here with NO advice like the others did. I see you only came here to attack me in a sensitive post I made, not so peaceful I would say. A 15 year old can give me advice, maybe you should aspire to act in his manner, it'd be an upgrade for sure.
I think Jeff was totally right. So I guess I'm a asshole who's only 2 years older than you. But really... you made a mistake and could have hurt someone really badly. Let her be bitchy and follow ihmurria's advice of avoidance. That's the best way to avoid conflict an unnecessary pain, after all. Good luck with getting the ex off your mind also. That's never fun and it take A LOT of time in some cases.
Seems as though you did a tad better than breaking even w/this Thread. Not too shabby for these Forums...*c*
I dunno man...I've been raped in the past and I would agree, relationships can be really helpful as parts of the healing process......I think you should wait alittle while until you guys can be friends again...then maybe you can break it to her easy. I don't blame you....It's rough getting over ex's without finding comforts in rebound relationships....... Personally, if I were her, I would be intensely pissed if you told me......but I'm not her and I completley understand where you're coming from. Like I said, maybe you should wait awhile.... For you, I hope that you can get over your ex, and that this type of thing never happens again. But in the mean time, everyone makes mistakes, and it seems like both of you were vulnerable when you decided to get together. I simpathize with you both.....forgive yourself first, if you indeed do feel remorse, and then let her know later on. REMEMBER!! My advice is no gospel to live by...just my opinion. Things happen, and you have to live with the way things are and come to peace with yourself and your past mistakes or experiences......hell.....how can you be a hippie without that eh? Best Wishes dude, really
