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after the show in Monterey

Discussion in 'Poetry' started by sky, Jun 14, 2004.

  1. sky

    sky Member

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    As we drove that night from Monterey, I laid refining my eyes to a symphony of cloud sized tree tops. Breathing green overtures from motion turning, as it did inside me. From lovely drink, post-gig houseboat sweets, toasts to secret surf spots, & everything born from stars. I'm happy this way. In clear skies. Not burning from the sun inside. Celebrating moments with total strangers. Appreciating the force concieved tonight, as we were killing time.
     
    sky, Jun 14, 2004
    #1
  3. Fierce_Flawless

    Fierce_Flawless Hip Forums Supporter HipForums Supporter

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    time: we're constantly killing it and yet it never dies. :D
     
    Fierce_Flawless, Jun 14, 2004
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  5. EdgeUcatE

    EdgeUcatE Member

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    I liked that, such a nice feeling, u have a great way with describing a scene and mood blended together to give this raw feeling to the reader, well done

    I like the way u describe the bad feelings, and marking a change in the poems mood and tensions, nice work, I would like to see some longer stuff from u. peace
     
    EdgeUcatE, Jun 14, 2004
    #3
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