on going fight w/ my bf, what's ur opinion?

well, you can say anyhting you want. I think you're just bitching to bitch about something and I don't give a fuck,

If you're too petty that you need to combine my problem with hers, than I don't need to waste my time agruing the point with someone who just wants to whine about something.

 

she's posted elsewhere recently about how he is controlling and stuff, so i don't think the relationship has been 'fine' for months. i think it is her withdrawing from critisism, because she wanted 'aww sweetie' pity and didn't really get it. i remember doing this when i was with my ex. its scary to face reality. i pretty much agree with heady moe. and all i can say is i hope some of this sinks in before it is too late.

 

NOW HERE'S SOMEONE WHO ACTUALLY GETS IT.
YOU PEOPLE REALLY DO NEED TO LEARN HOW TO GET OFF YOUR FUCKING PEDISTALS. GROW THE FUCK UP!
I WASN NOT IN ANY WAY LOOKING FOR PITTY SO INSTEAD OF THINKING THAT YOU'RE MAKING YOURSELF LOOK ALL GOOD BY TELLING ME TO LEAVE MY BOYFRIEND, WHY DON'T YOU JUST LAY THE FUCK OFF!?
I'VE BEEN IN FUCKING ABUSIVE RELATIONSHIPS IN THE PAST, I KNOW WHAT TO FUCKING LOOK FOR. AND THEY'VE ALL BEEN A HELL OF A LOT WORSE THAN THIS!
AND FOR YOUR LOVELY LITTLE INFORMATION, I DON'T NEED ANYONE TO FUCK ME TO MAKE ME FEEL PRETTY. I'M NOT SOME LITTLE SLUT THAT NEEDS TO BE SATISFIED. I KNOW YOU MIGHT NOT UNDERSTAND THIS, BUT I DON'T NEED THAT TO MAKE ME FEEL GOOD ABOUT MYSELF.

 

wa, wa, wa. Keep crying. and keep your whiny PM's to yourself. They waste space and my time.

I suggest not caring so much about someone's opinion that you don't even know. You post a problem, you'll get all kinds of responses. Even ones you really don't want to hear. That's life.

If you can't respect my opinion, if you don't want to hear opinions that you might not agree with, don't cry about your problems then. Don't post them. Plain and simple.

Edit: thank you Jamaica. I'm glad someone sees the truth in what I say.I don't sugar coat things, not when there's been so much evidence of him abusing her mentally, and emotionally. Too bad the one who counts is drowning in denial.

 

yawn...whatever you say....you're starting to bore me now.
You don't have an opinion. You just down-grade everyone else to make yourself feel better.

 

yeah, facing reality can be scary. but like humandraydel said, people change. I was his first really serious girlfriend. We had 3 months of a rough patch. Now for the last year and a half, they've been better.
And no, I was NOT looking for sympathy.
Therapy or something like that is the best way to go. You try to make something better. If nothing else works from there, THEN you go. So I'm supposed to run away whenever something goes bad? I've stopped doing that a long time ago.
I know that I can be stubborn and a bitch, and it's not just his "manipulation" that makes me think that. I know i am. My friends, family, and everyone who I've ever known has said that. Now, they can't all be in some weird abusive conspiracy against me, can they? No.
That guy gets up to go to work every morning without a complaint while I sit at home. When I ask him if he wants me to get a job, he says that i can if I want, but his reason for getting up in the morning is me and our baby. He tells me how much he loves being able to support us. That's not manipulation. He's giving me the freedom to choose to do whatever I want to.
I made a mistake even re-hashing that old fight between us. It gets brought up maybe once every 3 months, if that. I've got a ridiculous jealousy problem as it is. That's why all my other bf's have left. Maybe I was just over-exaggerating. That's what I've done before, and even my old friends said that i was being ridiculous.
I'm NOT making any of this up, if that's what you're thinking. Some people think that just because I'm "defending" him by seeing my own faults, that it's another "abuse" technique. He's had a lot to put up with from me. I know that he's never cheated on me. And he's done nothing but support me in any decision that I've made. He didn't make me dump my old friends, that was my decision. My old best friend (the gay one) has deveolped a bad drug problem, and didn't want to have anything to do with me because I wanted him to stop using. If you don't believe me, look into my old posts, I've talked about him.
Yeah, we have our problems, but what couple doesn't? Every couple that I know is the same as us, wether they be the same age or my parents or whatever.
I was just upset with him when I posted that, and I shouldn't have. Everyone gets carried away when they're mad.

 

'everythings been fine for the last year and a half" then why the fuck were you posting a month ago about how trapped you were and how all he did was this and that blablabla.

no not everyone gets carried away when they are mad. some of us can still maintain rationality and objectivity. our stories don't change 180 degrees like yours seem to do. i've seen three posts now from you whining about this guy and how bad it is and you now have just COMPLETELY contradicted them. wtf is that?? i think you are the one who needs to grow up little girl.

 

have you ever heard or realizing that you were wrong?
no, that post about being "trapped" was not about him. It was about me wanting to move and he wanting to stay at his job. THAT WAS IT. And I have come to realize that I was wrong.
Yeah, I made him look bad in my post. I made a mistake. Pretty much everything that I post about him is when I'm mad at him. Why do you think that I'm posting? I wanted to go and blow off some steam. I just wasn't seeing his side.
This whole post wasn't even about leaving him. It was about who was right in that argument. He said that guys were siding with him in that there was nothing wrong, and I even had my old BOSS tell me that I was wrong when I asked him. If I wanted an opinion on leaving him, then I would have asked for it.
Look, I tried to explain this to you in a civil manner, so if you can't take that, that's your own problem.

 

Alright, here. How about you read up on the symptoms of abusive relationships. Then make your best friend or whoever knows your relationship next best (not your partner) read up on those symptoms too, and get their opinion. Just say something like "people heard about a fraction of our relationship and thought it was abusive, what's your take?" Obviously none of us here knows every detail of your relationship, but a lot of people on the forums seem to have gone through abusive relationships in the past, which is why they're being so vehement about it. THEY ARE TRYING TO PROTECT YOU, it may not be the best method of doing so, but that's the intent behind their posts. Not to attack you, to try and prevent any damage to you and your child from this relationship.

 

I've had really abusive relationships in the past. I know how they go. And I've gotten out of them.
I have done what you said and I've talked to family about this, and a side from them saying he can be a bit controlling sometimes, they've also stressed that he's also a good man....I wish I could only PROOVE that in some other way than to say SORRY I WAS WRONG. That's just the way he is. All the men I've grown up around have been the exact same way as him, with the exception of my dad, who I don't talk to anymore. The rest of those men are great guys. And everyone loves cody.
I understand what most of these people are saying, and I know that they're just trying to offer advice. However, when I offer another perspective to the story, saying that maybe I'm jumping to conclusions, I get attcked. If you ask me, that's the smart thing to do. I don't always have to be right, but I guess I know that some of the people on here think otherwise about themselves.

 

He doesn't hit me. I hit him more than he has even thought about hitting me, and I just do it playfully.
Yeah, we yell, I'm used to it. I'm the friggin queen of yelling. Always have been. That's just me.
We both have some growing up to do. And we both know that.
He doesn't treat me like shit, I just stupidly made it out that way one night when I posted this and was mad at him.

 

lol, and he ain't no stud. He's a good looking guy.....but lol, he's almost the definition of a gaming nerd. No offence to you guys out there who are or anything.

 

it's nice to finally see someone who sees it from my point of view.
He's great, doesn't hit, works hard, and he doesn't even like to yell. It's me who yells (bad habbit from growing up in a very loud family). We just argue a lot. Usually about doing to dishes, supper, laundry....typical things. I may feel unappreciated at times, and that seems to be when I come on here and rant about him, but what women had the perfect man who works, cooks, cleans, and such? NONE! lol
I'll just learn to stay away from this site when I'm mad.