Some List about useless stuff that you won't care about

Some guys list of interesting things apparently....(ok i was bored. what else is there to do online?!

"We always hear "the rules" from the female side. Now here are the rules from the male side. These are our rules: -

01. Breasts are for looking at and that is why we do it. Don't try to change that.
​

02. Learn to work the toilet seat. You're a big girl. If it's up, put it down. We need it up, you need it down. You don't hear us complaining about you leaving it down.
​

03. Saturday = sports. It's like the full moon or the changing of the tides. Let it be.
​

04. Shopping is NOT a sport. And no, we are never going to think of it that way.
​

05. Crying is blackmail.
​

06. Ask for what you want. Let us be clear on this one: Subtle hints do not work! Strong hints do not work! Obvious hints do not work! Just say it!
​

07. Yes and No are perfectly acceptable answers to almost every question.
​

08. Come to us with a problem only if you want help solving it. That's what we do. Sympathy is what your girlfriends are for.
​

09. A headache that lasts for 17 months is a problem. See a doctor.
​

10. Anything we said 6 months ago is inadmissible in an argument. In fact, all comments become null and void after 7 days.
​

11. If something we said can be interpreted in two ways, and one of the ways makes you sad or angry, we meant the other one.
​

12. You can either ask us to do something or tell us how you want it done. Not both. If you already know best how to do it, just do it yourself.
​

13. Whenever possible, please say whatever you have to say during commercials.
​

14. Christopher Columbus did not need directions and neither do we.
​

15. ALL men see in only 16 colours, like Windows default settings. Peach, for example, is a fruit, not a colour. Lilac is a flower. We have no idea what mauve is.
​

16. If it itches, it will be scratched. We do that.
​

17. If we ask what is wrong and you say "nothing," we will act like nothing's wrong. We know you are lying, but it is just not worth the hassle.
​

18. If you ask a question you don't want an answer to, expect an answer you don't want to hear.
​

19. When we have to go somewhere, absolutely anything you wear is fine. Really.
​

20. Don't ask us what we're thinking about unless you are prepared to discuss such topics as Sex, Sport, or Cars.
​

21. You have enough clothes.
​

22. You have too many shoes.
​

23. I am in shape. Round is a shape.
​

24. Thank you for reading this; Yes, I know, I have to sleep on the settee tonight, but did you know men really don't mind that, it's like camping. "​

​

​

I am slightly disturbed by this list. I seem to have most of the opinions of the male point of view. hmm. looks like i'm a deviant then! oh dear. what. a. bummer. (that was uhm sarcasm btw)​

​

​

​

 

I have a huge problem with #5. Crying is not blackmail. Crying is an emotion that cannot be contained, it's an emotional release. If I could not cry, I would explode & kill somebody. Believe me, I have tried NOT to cry many many times, it's impossible.

 

I agree. ggrr those generalisating males that wrote the lists...btw....it wasn't me that wrote it. it was a random forward..




darn you forwads"!!!!!! i'll get you yet!!!:$

I enjoy crying, it makes me feel better afterwards

 

01. Breasts are for looking at and that is why we do it. Don't try to change that. Breasts are for breast feed, don't see me staring at your man boobies!

02. Learn to work the toilet seat. You're a big girl. If it's up, put it down. We need it up, you need it down. You don't hear us complaining about you leaving it down. 90% of lung/throat infections are caused by leaving the toilet seat up when you flush, tiny pee and poo particals are propelled off into the air, you think I wanna snog some one with pee particals in their mouth?

03. Saturday = sports. It's like the full moon or the changing of the tides. Let it be. If you wanna watch fit men running around a pitch, that's fine. Just don't expect me to do the same.

04. Shopping is NOT a sport. And no, we are never going to think of it that way. Shopping is an art.

05. Crying is blackmail. doesn't work though, does it.

06. Ask for what you want. Let us be clear on this one: Subtle hints do not work! Strong hints do not work! Obvious hints do not work! Just say it! The idea is you get us the nice birthday present and pretend you thought it up on your own, it's called romance.

07. Yes and No are perfectly acceptable answers to almost every question. circumstance doesn't exist, right?

08. Come to us with a problem only if you want help solving it. That's what we do. Sympathy is what your girlfriends are for. but you always come up with stupid ideas! No I do not want to have it out with my boss, I want to emotionally support my friend not make her feel stupid... maybe if men listened a little more...?

09. A headache that lasts for 17 months is a problem. See a doctor. so is a seriously under sized dick

10. Anything we said 6 months ago is inadmissible in an argument. In fact, all comments become null and void after 7 days. does that enclude declorations of love, presents and the first time you asked me out? Great get out clause!

11. If something we said can be interpreted in two ways, and one of the ways makes you sad or angry, we meant the other one. What if both ways makes me angrey?

12. You can either ask us to do something or tell us how you want it done. Not both. If you already know best how to do it, just do it yourself. We often hope you can work it out for yourself. If god stepped in every time some one did something wrong, they'd never learn. Same principle

13. Whenever possible, please say whatever you have to say during commercials. because the tv is more important that me. I get it. you can get a blow job off the tv tonight then.

14. Christopher Columbus did not need directions and neither do we. Columbus was looking for New Zeeland and got lost.

15. ALL men see in only 16 colours, like Windows default settings. Peach, for example, is a fruit, not a colour. Lilac is a flower. We have no idea what mauve is. that explains alot...

16. If it itches, it will be scratched. We do that. if it itches, get some cream from the doctor.

17. If we ask what is wrong and you say "nothing," we will act like nothing's wrong. We know you are lying, but it is just not worth the hassle. and here we have the route of all marital break downs

18. If you ask a question you don't want an answer to, expect an answer you don't want to hear. what about question 11?

19. When we have to go somewhere, absolutely anything you wear is fine. Really. Even when your rival comes over and compliments us?

20. Don't ask us what we're thinking about unless you are prepared to discuss such topics as Sex, Sport, or Cars. don't ask us what we're doing today unless your prepared to discuss such topics as shopping, politics, or social unjustice

21. You have enough clothes. Yet nothing we ware draws attention away from your fashion disaster

22. You have too many shoes. we buy shoes, you wank. Frankly ours is cleaner

23. I am in shape. Round is a shape. it'll also bring on premature heart failure which men are proen to.

24. Thank you for reading this; Yes, I know, I have to sleep on the settee tonight, but did you know men really don't mind that, it's like camping. " you like the settee? Why didn't you say so, this work mate needs a place to crash, he's five foot six and a body builder, he can have your side of the bed!

Does that make me a feminist, or can I claim PMS? =)

 

I thought Mr Columbus was looking for India...

 

he was looking for a route for trading to rip off the spanish. He still got lost and never made it there

 

An undersized dick that lasts for 17 months? I blame tight pants.

Electrifying!

*Cough*womentouchthemselvestoo*cough*

PMS? Terrorism? A terrorist is easier to negotaite with

 

LOL!!!!!

 

Power_13, women do touch themselves, however, I prepair shoes. All to do with childhood trauma

 

I always said masturbation and stilettos don't mix.

 

hehehe the list may play to stereotypes....but it made me giggle, especialy number 5, although to me crying is beautiful and certainly not blackmail...tehehe

 

*gag*

 

kier, i thought you said that crying was sad and made you cry? nuzzles

 

hahaha, i love you though im being serious, the best night of uni was when i met my friend em and we just spilt out our hearts

and lozi, crying is sad if the person is crying because they're sad, but it's still special

 

Bit of a simplification, don't you think? Would a young girl crying her eyes out after she's just been raped be 'special'? Yeah, tears can be a beautiful thing, but you can't just generalise like that and say crying is 'special'.

Your original post was relating to crying being used as blackmail. Crying is used as blackmail. Not always, but quite often. You can't just deny reality by pretending that everything is fluffy, dude.

 

true, of course, bad analysis on my part...but it is an overflow of emotion i guess?

 

He's only 5 foot six...what a short ass!!.....and a body builder ...Jeez if this is your ideal man to replace us then I am glad I am gonna be on that couch...

 

Absolutely true. Which is why tears can be beautiful and can also be horrific - they reflect a range of emotions.

 

and crying is beautiful....Oh come on fuck that....Stop crying about shit and get out there and do something about it....or get over it..... Life goes on....crying is not gonna help......

*awaits backlash*

 

Five foot six, that's my ideal hight for a girl =) whoops, a very short body builder. Ideally I'd replace all egotistically shallow people with sexy open minded women =P