When did your "desires" begin to shift more towards males?

papa:

Well said; I am in total agreement.

You are so very right; the "sex" part is easy; the "relationship" aspect indeed requires much work,honesty, and dedication (and not every man is interested in "relationships"), but, as you correctly stated, a "relationship" can come about when you least expect it.

Certainly glad you are one of the LUCKY ones, my friend!

 

If nothing else, being dissed for this got me to understand that gay folks weren't really all that different from everyone else in that they wanted the same things as everyone else does: Love, sex, and a relationship. They, too, are living in a world where men usually want sex but can (or will) find that some gay men are "just like women" in that if you want to have sex with them, you must commit to a relationship first. I would say that gay men got some "bad press" because of the gay men running around having sex and even when I was a young cocksucker I knew that most people, including men, knew that if you wanted a good blow job, get a gay dude to do it,

Well, until they found out that gay men aren't the only men who can and want to suck cock and fuck. With or without a relationship of any kind. Suck and fuck buddies are welcome. Relationships are optional and depending upon current social conditions.

 

KD23:

Having a steady "FWB" can either stay pretty platonic, despite the sex being passionate and hot, OR, it can become a quite complex issue, if one man desires an emotional relationshop as well as a sexual one, while the other only wants the sex, bit nothing more.

Can feelings get gurt?

Can there be a falling out?

Most certainly.

Of course, having a realistic outlook (as well as a mature one) when getting into a "FWB" thing would be an asset, IMHO.........

 

.....in reality, ANY relationship that involves ANY sort of sex can be as simple or as complex as you want....the thing is, how does the other (s) involved feel?

Then again, sometimes, things can start out pretty "pedestrian", but can also quickly escalate into a sutuation where a level head takes a back seat to pure lust.

Again, it all depends on those involved.............

 

My "desires" and curiosities shifted after my divorce. After my divorce I started watching a lot more porn. After watching straight porn of straight sex it got "monotonous". So I started watching close up videos of handjobs and blowjobs. While watching these types of videos I started noticing that I was paying more attention to the cocks. At first I was just mesmerized by watching the balls "dance" and the cock jerk and convulse as the guy was cumming. From there I graduated to watching close up videos of guys masturbating.While watching these videos I realized that I was admiring the shapes and sizes of certain cocks. The I noticed that I was getting aroused looking at and seeing those certain cocks cum. After a while I became aware that subconsciously I was thinking about what it would be like to stroke and even suck those beautiful cocks. Unfortunately, I haven't found the right man as an FWB, but I'm not gonna give up looking!!!

 

I think, that, "shifting desires"-wise, you have quite a bit of company, especially with guys (divorced or otherwise) finding the straight porn they had been watching getting a bit stale.

Sure hope you find a "steady" "FWB" soon!

 

I always figured a MFM 3some would be the idea situation for this to happen. I always equate you "backseat to pure lust" as a "in the heat of the moment" type of thing. Under the right circumstances and right situation I could see a MFM 3some turning into a MMF 3some. You've got 3 sweaty, horny bodies rolling around together, licking , kissing and sucking anything and everything. Who's to say that it would be wrong for one or both of the guys to start sucking each other. Perfect opportunity for a nice oral "daisy chain" !!!!

 

If you are ever lucky enough to be the "middleman"in a MMM 3some, just be prepared to have your mind BLOWN (from what I've seen and read on the 'net!).......first class
"male bonding" all the way, my friend!

 

@GG57: I'm thinking that an FWB cannot be a platonic kind of thing because, um, what's the benefit other than just being good friends? I don't think that I've ever heard of a platonic sexual relationship; any platonic friendship that I've had (with women) have not been sexual, but it wanted to go their and... we didn't want to ruin the friendship.

A couple of platonic relationships did go sexual, didn't ruin the friendship but it was no longer platonic; really hard to go from not having sex to having mad crazy sex to going back to not having sex... and I wasn't going to tell her no.

My male friends were either of the no-sex type or the "we're gonna be howling at the moon when we make each other cum" type. My boyfriend was my boyfriend and in every way that meant. Most of the guys I had sex with was casual and with a lot of guys coming back for more, not like a suck/fuck buddy but dude got horny and came looking for me or ran into me, I ain't doing nothing and, sure, I'm up for some cock sucking.

No biggie because we've done it before. An FWB? I can't say that I ever thought of it like that other than it being a matter of convenience and not a "I want you as my one and only male lover!" which I'm not really opposed to but it limits me to sex with one guy and he's likely to be unhappy with me because I'm not of a mind to be monogamous about it - there are too many other cocks out there to be had to be stuck with just one and then not being able to get it when I need it and other dramatic shit that can be prone to happen.

What to do if he gets deep into his feelings? Would cross that bridge if I had to but that would infer that I selected a single guy as a single source of cock... and I don't know why I'd do that. What does this mean to the guy whose desires are shifting more toward males?

Not a damned thing. This is me, my experiences, my thoughts, feelings, and beliefs about it. If homey wants to come by and we get into it, fine (unless I have something important to do) but if we just hang and play video games, I'm good with that, too. If I get some dick from the guy around the corner, I don't want to hear any shit from my "FWB" about giving it up to someone else and more so when I made it clear that I'm not going to be monogamous but, sure, if you ask me who else I've been sucking, I'll tell you.

And if it makes you unhappy, well, remember: You wanted it like this, and I told you my side of things. If you're looking for that single source of cock, go for it and may Lady Luck be with you but I would never turn down the NSA casual offer unless I had a damned good reason to. Why?

Because it's cock. I've sucked cock all across the country in my travels and in a couple of foreign countries because it's cock and very experience is different and exciting. Again, this is me - you have to decide what you're going to do with a guy and what it's going to take for him to get you naked and in bed.

 

KD23:

One of your most in-depth and INTRIGUING responses ever; man, oh, man, you sure got your act together!

Talk about seeing it all and doing it all; dang, NO GRASS ever grew under YOUR feet, my friend!

Again,"tell it like it is", brother!

 

Guys dealing with this change have a lot to think about. It's me telling it like it is and how it can be and even what it's like for me. My now-late son-in-law and I had a nice FWB thing going after I introduced him to the joys of sucking cock and he fucked it up by (a) calling me at 3 in the morning and talking about he couldn't sleep and (b) telling me - not asking me - to come suck his dick and then (c) he got pissed because I ripped him a new one for (d) waking me up and (e) making demands and (f) I ended what was a damned good thing. The next FWB situation was much better and extremely pleasant for the both of us. But when that went away - and I knew it would - I was right back in "the market" looking for more cock to suck.

For me, this is as normal as breathing is. I've had decades to put it all together for myself and my motto has been, "If you're going to do it, then do it."

 

KD23:

I can only guess ar how many "quirky" characters you've encountered throughout the years that, clearly, have not the slightest idea as to just how demanding, needy, and annoying they really are, when it comes to their sexual needs being met, regardless of the inconvenience it might pose to the other involved individual.

Regarding this, I am sure you have more stories than Charles Dickens....(!!)

 

I think it was maybe 10 demanding pains in my ass (and not the good kind). I learned, early on, to become a good judge of character and to watch and listen and the majority of the quirky motherfuckers will reveal themselves so when they hit on me or try to seduce me, I can say no - and be able to back it up.

I told one guy, "You'll have to beat my ass to get my ass..." and he thought he could. Found out otherwise. A few guys who literally wanted me to beat them up and "rape" them. Being "stalked" by a few gay men because they loved being with me and being in bed with me and they wanted more than I was willing or able to give them... and they got salty and I was all kinds of rotten lying motherfuckers; one called me a son of a whore and I beat him pretty badly because no one talks about my mother like that. No. One.

Guys dressing up like women and... they shouldn't have. The guy who answered his door wearing a diaper; I turned around, got back in my car, and went home. The near perfect guy who ruined a good thing when he asked if I'd be offended if he wanted me to piss on him. No, I wasn't offended, but I wasn't doing that - that's what toilets are for. Lots of guys who didn't understand that when I say no, I mean no.

 

KD23:

Obviously, there are those men who, for whatever their "needs", REFUSE to take "NO!" for an answer (I mean, come on, how many ways can you say "NO"?)

Yeah,"fetishes" that are toilet-related (and other totally freaked-out stuff) TOTALLY gross me out; but, as you and I BOTH know, as the old saying goes, "it takes all kinds"...........

 

The nice thing about things M2M is that there's something for everyone, from plain vanilla to "who the fuck does shit like that?" A guy asks, "What have you done?" and I say to him, "The question you should be asking is what haven't I done." There are things I will not do, things that I've done, didn't like it, won't ever do it again. But remember that I grew up in the era where the watchword of the day was, "Try it - you might like it!" and I tried a lot of things before realizing that the thing I love the most is giving and getting head. The thing I dislike the most? Having to explain to someone - and someone who sucks dick - why I suck dick.

 

KD23:

When it comes to generosity, you'll always hear the time-honored:

"......it's better to GIVE then RECEIVE....."

Well, unless you are a total "top", it would seem that it's just as much GIVING as it is RECEIVING.....(!!)

 

Top or bottom?

NO MASCULINTY IS LOST when a "masculine" man bottoms for another; hell, it's all part of the "baby, let your freak flag fly!" game....forget the screwed-up stereotypes and stigmas.....go forth and ENJOY!

 

But is it really? I know and learned that there's really no such thing as "being equal" when it comes to having sex since you have preferences and other things to conform to in order for a partner to have a good sexual experience. Okay. I love to give head. I could spend all day sucking cock and eating pussy but here's the rub: I love having my dick sucked, too. I had my share of sex with guys who (a) didn't suck dick and (b) wasn't into being fucked and while they enjoyed having me sucking their dick and getting them off and/or them loading my rectum up with cum and leaving me hanging and like pleasuring them was the only thing that was supposed to happen and I was to only get "satisfaction" from them busting a nut in me.

Oh, hell, no. Once I got wise to this, I shut it all down. If you don't suck dick, don't bother to ask me to suck you off; if you want to fuck me, you'd better be ready to have me in your ass as well. Otherwise, no deal. Indeed, the whole top and bottom thing had seemed to get locked into specific behaviors, i.e., tops did this, bottoms did that and versatile guys only had a choice to either top or bottom and... what the fuck kind of bullshit is this? I had sucked this guy off, swallowed his cum, and laid back so he could get to work on me. He says, "I don't do that!" and I shredded his ass for a good long moment until I realized that by complaining to him, I... sounded like some females who wound up asking guys, "What about me?"

I thought it was bad enough to have women demanding to get eaten - and thoroughly so - but they wasn't going to suck dick and, okay, sweetie, you don't suck dick, I'm not eating that pussy and since you like having that done - and I like doing it - we both lose. Always in mind was the fact that if a woman wouldn't do it, a guy would so if girlfriend wasn't going to suck my dick, all I had to do was step outside and run into a guy who is (a) looking to get sucked off and (b) willing to suck somebody off in return. It's not about fairness so much, not like it was when I was young and us horny dudes felt and believed that if you sucked me off, I sucked you off. If you fucked me, I fucked you. And if you weren't down with this, you couldn't hang out with us. Into the teen and adult years and you find out that the game is played differently and that if you don't adjust and adapt, well, your sex with guys experience might suffer but if the guys wanting to have sex with you have their likes and dislikes and are of a mind to enforce them, well, if that's how the game is played now...

...I do not believe that it's better to give than to receive, not when I want to give and receive. Running into guys who gave me magnificent head and left me drained but seriously horny to suck them off and they say, "Oh, you don't need to do that!" or "I don't like having my dick sucked!" and, okay, I love to suck cock and you're telling me that I can't suck you off? My pleasure is incomplete and my investigation into this insanity revealed some stuff that, in truth, made sense and with the main thing being that if the other guy cums, he's out of the game and may not be able to finish or get back in. I understand this but if you suck me off, dude, it's your turn... because I'm a cocksucker, too.

It made me wonder what happens if two tops or two bottoms were to try to get together and using the information gained from both tops and bottoms over a period of a couple of years, I came to the unseemly conclusion that if both stayed strictly true to their roles, nothing was going to happen between them unless one guy decided to take one for the team (and something else I don't believe in). Being versatile, I can top and bottom but I realized that I'm neither a top or a bottom and there's a distinction here that when I first saw it, had me rolling my eyes because it didn't make sense and more so when sex, supposedly, is to be mutually satisfying.

But if you're a top who doesn't suck cock, well don't ask me to suck your dick. Why? Again, it's simple: I'm a cocksucker and I get a lot of pleasure from sucking cock, but I also love to be sucked and finished, too. Now, if I have to comply with your requirements, what makes you think that you can ignore mine and like they don't matter? I often put my protege on blast because he talks to me like I'm a bottom and how he's going to love having me suck him off before he recovers so he can fuck me and his whole demeanor change when I say, "Is that before or after I dump some cum down your throat and fill your ass up with more cum?"

Because homey don't play that shit. Been there. Done that. If you want what you want, then I want what I want, too. In my sexual world, it is not better to give than receive - it's better to give and receive; otherwise, we're not likely to be having sex. If I choose not to suck you, that's one thing and, yeah, sometimes, I get like that but not very often. I can very much appreciate a damned good blowjob, but I can give one, too, and to hear, "It's better to give than to receive and I don't like having my cock sucked..." kinda pisses me off and I feel... neglected. On the whole, it doesn't feel right that you get to suck me off and... I can't suck you off. Why?

Because first and foremost, I'm a cocksucker and if you are, well, now, we're going to have a good time. But if you're one of those "tops" who wants to be sucked off but doesn't suck cock? Don't waste your time or mine because if you think that I'm a bottom and supposed to operate under those "rules," you got the wrong guy. Go away and find someone who will okay with you not sucking their dick.

So, for the guys who are feeling their desires starting to shift, once more, the above is me; it's the things I learned from 60 years of having sex with guys. I hated having to "play the game" and it's bad enough that you gotta play it with women, too, and you "new guys" will have to decide how you're going to "play the game" and with the understanding that there will be guys who are not going to want to do things the way you want to do them - and then decide what, if anything, you're going to do.

Or not do.

 

I've always said that it takes some very manly guts to (a) suck a man's cock and (b) take it in the ass...