Has the lack of sex at home driven you towards your Bi Curiosities

No sex at home for over 17 years has made me more curious about the bi lifestyle. Giving and receiving….. and no she doesn’t know and never will

 

Definitely a struggle. So many things in life change. Your health, family issues and just life. Things get out of balance and ultimately your life and your sex life gets impacted. Trying to make sense of it is difficult. I would rather be with my wife and having normal sexual relations. I also equate that feeling of love and connection of what makes sex special. I am not looking for that from someone else.

However I still have the need for sexual release and I got tired of masturbating being my only release.

So I started exploring. Didn’t want another women and the drama etc…

 

For me, I always preferred women, in every way.
It was hard finding quality women with a high enough sex drive to match mine. I was a late bloomer with women, misunderstanding near blatant flirting signals as teasing. Not realizing women were sexual beings that could pursue, just as well as be pursued?
I think I considered guys just out of logic, and a stronger desire to have sex? But I was rarely into stereo typical gay guys, mainly just interested in bi guys. And was interested in group sex that brought it about.
I kept an open mind to combinations and activities with other men. But bi guys were rare to find. The one co-worker who was openly bi,seemed a bit hipoyish for me to relate to, it ask questions, and I noticed the others kept him at a slight distance. I didn't pursue it more out of stigma, fear of what the woman will think, or the other guy will think?
Being shunned by 60% of women if they learn I liked playing with other guys? Family, friends, and workplace discrimination, if not blatant and severe, they would take a step back from you on interactions, closeness and friendship as I observed of the coworker?
I know those things kept me quiet about it, even to a bisexual girlfriend who told me her coworker pegged her husband and my GF thought it sounded fun! I wasn't and still am not into the reality of penetration with the real thing,but open to try pegging it prostrate play, and be a top?
So, if I had an attractive, fit woman with sexual energy & drive, I wouldn't give bi sex much thought. But the interest & fantasy of it, it watching bi porn wouldn't go away. I just wouldn't have much time or energy for it?

 

It

Since it had become an open part of our marraige along with many other things, Bi Sex was a very interesting experience/experiences. Its easier for me to meet and cheat with another older woman, then to meet another horny old guy, but thats off the table.
My wife is all for it, another guy that is, but we don't have the occasion to meet others like we used to. Not too many prospects at the senior center. If we do go to a public place, like a mall or the market, it leaves you wondering if the other is thinking the same thing. For now its just my wife, me and a few dildos. Boating season is approaching, which brings a lot more interaction with other horny old sea captains. Who knows, maybe the other guys are in the same boat and their wives are very accepting of their needs. Too bad there isn't a disrete type of sign or something , short of a Bat Signal.

 

Some kind of a signal would be great, make life alot easier for everyone.

 

I had never thought about same sex until my late 30s. Yes it was a time that the wife was not really into sex. I still had my needs or wants. It started with me going to adult arcades to watch straight porn. Never went into the one w a glory hole. But guys would know on my door. Took awhile then I finally let a guy in. After he sucked be off and took my load, I got out and ran as fast as I could. ashamed of what I let happen. Well curiosity got me started exploring more and more. Fast forward many years. I ended up really liking the same sex encounters. Met one certain guy that I had a long time fuck bud scenario with. Explored about all 2 men could with each other. Now realizing I’m bi and very possibly gay. Closeted and doing this all behind my wife’s back. Eventually getting bought by my wife and hitting rock bottom of wtf. 2 years w no same sex encounters. Do I miss it yes some days I do.

 

Don't over think it. Its only sex and it's done.You just want great orgasm, or do you crave other men and their cock? If you have a family life, other then sex? Separate the two and enjoy both without letting it get in the way

 

I used to go to adult arcades and bookstores (those were the days) but for a long time I would only look at straight porn. Didn’t want anyone to think I was even slightly gay. I finally decided to try m2m sex. Once I sucked my first cock, I was hooked. But now there are no adult arcades or bookstores anywhere near me. I’m on a bunch of gay/bi hookup sites but it’s hard to meet up with other married guys. No one can host and outside hookups are kind of risky. But I keep trying.

 

Your explorations sound very similar to mine. I still love fucking woman but yea a cock gives me a total different pleasure

 

i love fucking women and eating pussy but I also love having my lips around a nice cock and receiving a nice load of cum

 

I have had my best luck when I have been out of town traveling to meet other married guys.

Have had good luck with Squirt and sometimes with Doublelist.

 

I've commented on this subject a number of times throughout this forum and the lack of sex or infrequency of sex from the wife has led many married men to seek out alternatives. Many guys have affairs with other women which I did myself but there was too much drama for me as she made hints of wanting more than sex which I was not interested in myself. The sex at home would run in spurts, sometimes many months of no sex where I was left with masturbation. I enjoy masturbation but it's not as satisfying as a warm, wet mouth is.

One afternoon while at a local park a gay man offered me a blowjob, so I took him up on his offer. We walked into the tree line, I dropped my pants and he proceeded to give me the best blowjob to date, repeatedly deep throating my 8" and swallowed my load after 10 minutes of sucking on me. He became my alternative twice a week afterwork for several months until he too wanted more so I had to break it off with him as well.

Fast forward about a year. I'd always been fascinated with big cocks, and now found myself wondering what it would be like to actually suck on one. I came across the personal section of Craig's List to find many married guys in my area seeking out blow jobs and/or mutual suck buds. I hit the jack pot. To speed things up here I quickly found out how much I enjoyed sucking cock and was doing so 2-3 times a week as my oral skills got better and better over time.

He I am almost 30 years later and in my second marriage that has experienced a fizzled sex life, but I've had a suck-bud for over 13 years now that my wife has always been aware of, encourages my oral relationship with him and is pretty much my regular thing for sexual release now and I'm perfectly fine with just having oral sex with him and occasionally with his wife too. Yes, my wife is fully aware that I am fucking her too. My wife and I love each other dearly and she does not want me to not be sexually satisfied even though she has lost her sexual desires.

 

Magic! I could never bring that subject up with mine. I am still holding hope her desire comes back, but not holding my breath. Happy for you! I think we all struggle separating love, sex and our relationships. Glad you have found what works for you and can be open it about it.

 

Seems like the same theme that lead us to the same journey. Damn menopause was the breaking point. Even though I always had a fascination with woman’s under garments and not recoiling when there would be naked men around. But during the years of marriage don’t think I spent 2% of my time on alternative sexual desires. Now it’s just the opposite 98%. Haha.

 

I’d guess it’s definitely for some and not for others. For me, I had bicurious leanings way before I got married but I think if I had sex with my wife regularly those bi cravings would be pretty low. I’ve had one cock in my mouth and I did enjoy it and still enjoy fantasies of it but that’s been almost 4 years ago and I haven’t done anything again.
I don’t think I ever expected sex to be such a tough thing in life. I was naive I guess and thought married couples had sex. My parents did a lot so that’s what I thought was normal. Turns out there’s usually a difference in sex drives between most couples. Even ones that have sex some want it more or less. I may or may not pursue sex with men again but I’m pretty certain it will be somewhat later in life. When my kids are grown and my wife is definitely done with sex is when I’d likely find a regular guy for sex.

 

The lack of sex or should I say dry spells at times pushed me to have sex with men back when I was single in my dating phase.

so while I was getting laid by women I would not think about men. But the times I didn’t have a girl, I was all over it having sex with men. I had a regular lay that understood me when I needed to get dicked down. Don’t regret it one bit! The best sex I ever had was with this guy. He just made me feel like I could get loose, and that sexually I could totally be myself. I felt so free spiritually and sexually. As much fun and as awesome it is to have sex with girls, with this guy it felt like an adventure. To date no girl has ever made me feel like this. I will still choose a woman for a sexual relationship but I would never say no to sex with a man.

 

When you have no other options, its a very unique and pleasurable experience.

 

The same scenario for me as everyone else.
Wife and I had a couple over for dinner and drinks one evening and we all got drunk and the other woman ended up giving me a BJ and my wife did the same for the other guy. We ended up meeting and doing the same more times when one evening the girls passed out and the other guy approached me. We're now doing more by ourselves and it's going to continue to progress as neither of us are getting enough at home. We're now getting into more sexual activities and I'm looking forward to continuing down this road.