Sur le souvenir d'une mémoire à long terme

Short-term memory is the capacity to recall a small amount of information from a recent time period. Long-term memory is the capacity to recall memories from a longer time ago. People can sometimes experience issues with their short-term or long-term memory.

I recall events and feelings from my 20s and 30s with a stronger sense of connectedness and sensory awareness than I do with events of the recent past. I believe that one of the reasons for this is the fact that back then I used to keep a journal of the events of my life. When I was living on the edge and I didn't know where my next meal or rent money would come from, I become more sensitive about things that were occurring in my life. I will demonstrate this with a copy of a journal entry:

"Friday, 28 VII 1989
"Got a call from Dale. Richard hung himself. 'Richard, how could have have been so stupid?' 'Is he really dead?' These were the thoughts that went through my mind.
"I met him in the winter of 1986. I had left the Wonderful World and began to smoke again."

"Here is a reprint of my entry from 04 XI 1986:

"To say that I am disappointed in that 'cute' guy who snorts coke, drinks Bacardi, and is as unemployed as I am would be an understatement. I can only blame myself for having put too much faith in him and expecting him to show good judgement."

"06 XI 1986:

"There is nothing wrong with my leaving someone who is drunk."

Back to Friday, 28 VII 1989

"My journals remain a treasure. these two quotes come directly from the books. As I re-read them, I find I had encounters with men I don't remember.
"Richard is now quite dead. AUTO ASPHYXIA."

I remember the call from the roommate/lover (with whom I'm guessing there was no sex going on). I heard the details of how his body was found on the floor, naked, with a neck tie wrapped around his throat and the end of the tie attached to the door knob. He had a cat in his room that was crying. And his car was in the car port. And the roommate/lover heard calls coming in but never bothered to see if he was in the house or not.

The reference to the "Wonderful World" was a job that I had worked at on Russian Hill in San Francisco. We had a bookkeeper, the anorexic hillbilly, who thought she had a flair for writing. She actually wrote a welcome letter to a new client (along with her billing) in which the salutation was "Welcome to the Wonderful World of P*n*s and Partners!" Wonderful world!!? Ha! I used to call it the merry-go-round of horrors.

But I did remember Richard's alcoholism (he kept rum and cola under his bed). He was not the first love interest of mine that had wet brain. I wish I knew how to detect it early on and how to run away quickly from it. I remember that he was a good kisser and was totally into orally satisfying my needs. Such skill can have me overlook some of the more obvious defects of character.

But short term? I couldn't tell you how much money is in the bank or when the last time was that I lit candles on Friday night.

172,75 cm
84,2 kg

For some reason, I always think heights and weights in metric sound more valid than the inches and pound metrics. (Unless, of course, you measure weight in stones).