Wait, your parents were 70 when they had you? I thought my parents were old. They had me last and both were way over the age.
All my words are lit, even your letters are strange... How you gonna sing the ABC song when they have you pronouncing Z like that? 'Zed'?
I sound like a dork. This video is from five years ago and was posted to this forum in 2012. Damn, I was scrawny then. Pretty sure I don't sound any different today. https://www.youtube.com/watch?v=9co5kftb83k
Been screwing around with this for a few minutes before seeing this: "No microphone detected! Please check you have a microphone and it is installed and connected properly." I guess my work computer doesn't have a built in microphone. I'll have to do it from my laptop later.
North Americans curiously pronounce scones (skawns) as sko nes - like the Scottish Stone of Scone. I'm converting them one by one but have only managed about 16 people in 20 years. It's just not going viral - I've gradually accepted 'biscuits' as wee buns, but I can't call Rich Tea biscuits or Digestives, cookies - or anything by Peak Freen etc
They are definitely pronounced scons. Not scones. And they are to be had with cream and jam, not gravy. Cookies are crumbly with chocolate chips, everything else is a biscuit. I really want to dunk some rich tea now.
Must be nice to be able to browse Hip from a work computer. If I did that at my job they'd show me the door.
https://www.nku.edu/~ocallaghant/LingVariation/AccentParagraph.htm Here are some sample paragraphs that apparent contain "key accent words"