Horrible In-Laws!

Discussion in 'All in the Family' started by archenemy, Feb 17, 2017.

  1. archenemy

    archenemy Members

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    I cannot stand pretty much all of my Husbands Family. theyre all horribly rotten to me. they constantly are making rude, snide comments towards me. theyre just awful. i held back screaming curses at them outta respect for my husband. but ive decided No More! Im gonna just start going ballistic on them. that should shut them up, right? Plus they come to my own home and treat me like garbage. they just make me Enraged. Anyone else in similar situation w/ nasty in laws u hate? What did U do? I have to tell them off, its the only way.
     
  2. morrow

    morrow Visitor

    I was in the same position long ago, and yes, one day I spoke out, told them to get the hell out of MY home, that unless they treated me with respect, they were no longer welcome..They left, then I got a phone call, with an apology..Was never the same again..Yes, I felt smug, but never forgotten!
     
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  3. archenemy

    archenemy Members

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    MORROW, Youre Great! Yep i wanna tell these jackasses theyre not even welcome in my home again...They have to take like 8 hr plane ride to get to my home. i wanna tell them to never think about visiting again. i refuse to be tortured anymore by these mean "people". i dont consider them people...
     
  4. morrow

    morrow Visitor

    One thing I never was, was disrespectful to any of them..You can't moan at their disrespect, if you do the same...Think about it!
     
  5. newbie-one

    newbie-one one with the newbiverse

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    I think that's reasonable, given the way that they've behaved.

    What does your husband think?
     
  6. Scratched

    Scratched Members

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    I've had these problems before, they are relationship killers. From now on, I stay away from meeting my date's folks as long as possible.
    Dating her, not them. Her friends, same thing. If problems start from any side, I ask her to call them out on it. If it continues, I leave.
    Life is too short and precious to let high-value dictators bother me.
    That's just how it is.
    One "could" use a machete on their tires when leaving things, and leave it stuck in the last tire. Wear gloves, no prints? haha
    (the offenders' tires, not the date)

    My friend did that to his gf's folks, when he was a teen. She told him how her dad molested her a lot. Yes he went to court for slashing the tires, and got out of it.
    The lady recorder smiled at him as he left...
     
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  7. unfocusedanakin

    unfocusedanakin The Archaic Revival Lifetime Supporter

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    My father's side hated my mother because she was not Catholic. Shortly after they were married my grandparent kept asking when they would have kids (as good Catholics do). My mom told them it was none of their business. My grandfather was enraged. How dare a women or anyone speak to me like that. When I was born they never wanted anything to do with me I guess because they were still mad about this. Before this it was years of mean back handed compliments from the rest of Dad's family to Mom when they dated. I think she made the right decision by standing up to him. I did not miss anything by not knowing them and it saved her years of abuse.
     
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  8. wedgesnobby

    wedgesnobby Members

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  9. la Principessa

    la Principessa Old School HF Member

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    We're not married yet but I'm really starting to not look forward to having my girlfriend's mom as an in law. I've spent enough time with her to realize that she's a textbook narcissist. She only thinks about herself and she's got that old-country mentality that no matter how old her daughter is, she has to obey and placate her on everything. When she voiced her opinion on the election her mom was ready to disown her.

    The thing that really made me lose respect for her is when she told me that years ago her mom had a boyfriend who was a drunk and they got into a fight. This fucking loser sprained my girlfriend's neck and her mom has never apologized for letting it happen, wouldn't let her call the police, and allowed him to stay in the house with them for another month because she "felt bad for him".u

    She never cares how we feel about anything, but if she's uncomfortable then everyone better watch out. She shuns family for disagreeing with her easily. She has no respect or loyalty to anyone but whoever she's dating at the moment. I feel bad but I tried to like her but I just can't respect the person she is. And it hurts my girlfriend because she sees more clearly the real picture of her mom through the way I'm baffled by the way she treats people. She doesn't want to know it but she has to because she's never going to get what she wants from her.

    Her mom doesn't to this day accept that her daughter is gay. She says she's not homophobic and she acts like she likes me but if we even reference a future together she looks like she's disgusted. She will knowingly introduce me as my girlfriend's friend. I mean I could see if we were newly established but this is an almost 4 year long relationship. She let her latest boyfriend move in with her after 2 dates and I'm crazy for talking about kids and marriage with my long term partner? I know she won't accept our marriage and I'm worried it'll become a situation where my girlfriend has to choose between her mom or me. Family is important but her mom doesn't care about her happiness and she'd suffer for it. Her mom is emotionally and mentally abusive.

    Sorry for the long post .Just needed to vent .
     
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  10. Vanilla Gorilla

    Vanilla Gorilla Go Ape

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    Could have sworn you two got married like 6 months ago

    Anyhoo, what do you think is going to happen when you do have kids? Mother/Mother in law stuff gets thrown out the window pretty quickly

    I notice in another thread you said your sister has fucked off somewhere with a guy, away from your mother amongst others

    "Her mom doesn't to this day accept that her daughter is gay" Are you SURE about that, I mean seriously ARE YOU SURE? Because thats not it, its because she knows whats coming, as soon as one of you have kids you both are just simply not going to care as much about her shit. And by the sounds of it, if she is the type thats with a different guy every 6 months, neither you or her daughter are going to want that anywhere near your kids....exactly as happened with every female friend your MIL has known for the last couple decades, as soon as they had kids they disappeared from her life

    Doesnt matter whether you are a girlfriend or boyfriend, you are still the person she knows will eventually take her daughter away from her
     
  11. la Principessa

    la Principessa Old School HF Member

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    Haha no, not married. But I see your point. Once we have kids, we're a family and she's just going to have to deal with it or be out of our lives. She's not often with a new guy, but when she does find one she likes, she lets him take over her life in like two seconds flat.

    I'd be surprised to know that she would even care I'm "taking away" her daughter. She honestly doesn't listen to her talk ever, shows no interest in her or my life, only calls when she needs something. I'm sure she loves her in her own way, but she doesn't seem like she cares about anything but herself.
     
  12. scratcho

    scratcho Lifetime Supporter Lifetime Supporter

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    In your own home? Demand respect or cut ém loose. And tell your husband to GROW A PAIR! This could continue "forever" unless one (or BOTH preferably) of you takes care of it.
     
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  13. TrudginAcrossTheTundra

    TrudginAcrossTheTundra Lifetime Supporter Lifetime Supporter

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    Well, it's your husband's responsibility to set them straight, not yours. Things will surely go awry if you go off on them. Make sure your husband understands how hurt you are. Give him a chance to make it right. If he doesn't, then it's to him you need to make the ultimatum.
     
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  14. PGA

    PGA Senior Member

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    Okay guys, do not go fast to talk about any types of IN-Law !! Just imagine, if at the present time, you are a daughter-in-law some years later you will be mother-in-law. So, if you don't like your daughter-in-law to do the same as you do with your mother-in-law; please be kind to your mother-in-law.
    If we give love to people, we will receive love, but if we give hate definitely we should accept hate. Life is too short, so be kind with your relative.
     
  15. PGA

    PGA Senior Member

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    Every woman as a young mother who has a son brings him up as a young man. This young man, who is your son will be a husband for a woman soon or late, and you will be a mother-in-law. But, still, he is your son no matter how old is he or how old are you. As a matter of fact, you, as a mother-in-law will share your love with your daughter-in-law, as exactly your mother-in-law shared her love with you.
    It is believed that life is like a circle, no matter from which point do you start, you will get the same point. If you cultivate wind, definitely you will harvest the tornado, so, it's better to have a friendly relation with parent-in-low. Yi=ou should be sure in an unfriendly relation with parent-in-law, the only person who suffers a lot is your husband and your kids.
    I hope I could be able to say my idea.
     
  16. TrudginAcrossTheTundra

    TrudginAcrossTheTundra Lifetime Supporter Lifetime Supporter

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    Bien dicho PGA!
    You reap what you sow.
    Karma.
    Yep.
    Love others as you do yourself.
    What goes around comes around.
    El mundo da vuelta.
     
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  17. PGA

    PGA Senior Member

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    There's a proverb, "You get by the same hand, that you give"
     
  18. TrudginAcrossTheTundra

    TrudginAcrossTheTundra Lifetime Supporter Lifetime Supporter

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    Well technically, one normally has two hands so it would be possible to dedicate one to each task.
     
  19. PGA

    PGA Senior Member

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    Hi
    You are right, but it is an ideological meaning. It means the result of the charitable job is positive, and you receive a positive answer (refer to your right hand) not negative answer (refer to receive by your left hand). I hope I could explain it well.
     
  20. TrudginAcrossTheTundra

    TrudginAcrossTheTundra Lifetime Supporter Lifetime Supporter

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    It's a little fuzzy to me yet; these translations of refranes are challenging because it's a concept they refer to which often cannot be expressed in the target language by translation of the words used.

    I'm guessing the concept in that one is "you give some, you take some".
    Although it might be getting at "it is better to give than to receive".
    Eh?
     

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