If Your Married- Can You Still Fall For Someone Else ?

it seems a lot of people get married because they love each other but sooner or later they meet another person and wind up falling for them. even though you are committed in " holy matrimony" can you fall for another person ? or is that it ?

 

Yeah you could.... If you didn't mind getting the crap beat out of you.


Just sayin'

 

yeah, i suppose it's possible. ever since they took the bride and groom lobotomies out of the marriage ceremony anyway.

 

Of course.

It all depends on your level of commitment whether or not you pursue it.

Sometimes there are more important things in life than feelings or lust.

And sometimes not.

 

Even long marriages end, just because there is no love there, doesn't have to be because there is someone else!
But I guess that you could fall for someone else, but maybe if you look elsewhere, it shows something is missing...

 

It happens all the time lol

 

Sure I can fall in love with someone else. I could fall in love with 1000 women at the same time, however that doesn't mean I would break from my commitmet.

 

My husband and I had a pretty good conversation about this recently. We both decided that yes, you can fall in love with or care deeply for someone else while you're married. It's called love without strings.

 

I have thought that most anyone, even if they are married, are going to attracted to people other than their spouse at times.

I've never been married, but I have been in serious relationships.

I have thought that once a person is committed, if they are beginning to dig someone else, they should have already decided to not allow themselves to feel that way about other people.

I have heard that doing this can be difficult at times -- perhaps impossible.

"All in all", I don't know, Ideally I suppose this wouldn't happen. I wouldn't be too hard on myself if I was the person having these feelings about another person.

This is a tough inquiry.

I guess maybe doing some heart-searching. Thinking things such as whether one wants to stay with the person they're married to still?

I would hope the person tempted to cheat would "think long and hard" about the short term and long term before making a decision.

This attraction may be really hot for a short time but is that worth risking what one already has.

Also, although it isn't my first recommendation for a couple I know nothing about, it may come to a place where it may be a good idea to discuss such matters with the person one is married too. Who knows??? Maybe that person can relate?

To add to that last paragraph, maybe a good talk -- if possible -- before actually leaving a marriage, may perhaps save it. ???

???

Maybe some of this can help. 'Hoping go. 'This was a really good topic and I would like to thank you from my selfish side for posting it.

Thank you.

P.S. --- I think it can hurt to hurt someone.

 

Fact is, what you want now is probably going to change in a decade. No matter what you say.

I used to say I'd never enjoy broccoli. I can't wait to eat it now.

I think it's important to find a partner who understands this and understands that, the relationship might have to open up to survive at some point. With sex being so flamboyant these days, I don't think it's realistic to hold a person growing into promiscuity into a monogamous relationship. I think that's cruel, if you cannot communicate with what's happening and what's changing in your life, mind and emotions etc. I think you're already off the tracks and waiting to completely derail.

 

Of course you can (and will).
Being married doesn't somehow keep you from falling for someone else...especially as your marriage matures.
We are human, and only in the most extreme recent history has humanity lived monogamously. It's why that in almost 3 out of 4 marriages - at least one cheats.
It is not that we are terrible creatures...it is that it is unreasonable and unrealistic to believe that we can live 3/4 of our lives having sex/romance with only one person.

 

I think that in a committed relationship, whether married or not, the trick is not so much not 'falling for somebody else,' but more about not allowing yourself to do anything about it.
Easier said than done I know but in a 100% committed relationship, it shouldn't be impossibly difficult.

 

I think a prime aspect of falling for someone else is having the freedom to do something about it, so I would say that no, you can't. You can really like someone/think they're attractive, but you can't engage that person in a way that can make you truly fall in love with them. Unless you equate falling in love to having little crushes on people.

 

It depends on your religion and marriage vows. Christians tend to be 1 on 1.
This causes many problems when the women start using access to sex to control their husbands, then the guys look elsewhere.

Most of my Muslim pals are allowed 3 wives, but not allowed sex outside marriage. They can have sex with their wife whenever they want, she is their property. It makes for stable family relationships with almost no divorce. No love involved, the woman's father sells her to the husband (or as part of a business deal). Generally Muslims believe that women are mentally incapable of making sensible life decisions, so the male head of their family makes all their important decisions for them.
My misses is Buddhist, I promised to provide for her, and she promised to serve me. No sexual promises at all, as long as I feed and house her, I've done my bit. Her promise to serve me has no limits. Not that love was involved in the process, I paid her parents the price they wanted, and that was that.

For most of the world marriage is a business deal.
It's only white folk (and during the last 100 years) that believe in marriage for love, and they're in a very small minority of this world and from what I've seen and experienced, mostly a total failure.

 

We had a non monogamous marriage for 40 years and I once fell deeply in love with my secretary who had a major crush on me. She invited me to dinner and then placed her hand on my crotch and rubbed me while telling me that she reserved a hotel room for us. The first time she orgasmed she yelled out the silliest thing I ever heard during sex. She said, "Now I know why they call you the boss." I had to refrain from laughing. After that she wanted to be with me all the time and would do anything sexually to win me over.

I did leave my wife for one month but then came to my senses. My wife has a girlfriend/lover so she had nothing to complain about other than the me leaving her part. We resolved it quickly and went back to our normal life sharing her girlfriend. After that I only had sex with women I would never see again like when I was away on a business trip. Our girlfriend also saw other men for a few years until she got married and then we all decided to keep sex and love among the four of us to be safe.

My wife always says that if you have sex with enough people you will eventually find someone who you instantly fall in love with. She should know because we fell in love when we first saw each other and were engaged 3 weeks later. We both tend to develop feelings fast for those we have sex with so we always had to be careful when we engaged in any group sex activities.

 

My wife has falling in love several times only once did she think of leaving me for him! When my wife makes love she gives you all she's got that's why they always come back for more! My wife is 53 and the guy was in his 30s so I think that made the division for her all though the guy still wanted her! She fall in love with the guy when she went to California with him for ten days and went as husband and wife! .