Seriously..

My husband just blew up the bathroom...I went in there unknowingly to put my face on, and was greeted with a stinky slap instead! I started dry heaving and actually threw up in my mouth!

I don't know WHAT he ate, but it was probably something I fed him.

Share your stinky partner poop stories here....so we can all have a chuckle.

 

i don't have a partner. my stinky poop stories are mostly my own. that, or strangers in the public restroom; those are the worst.

 

When I bought my house now I made sure the toilet was not in the bathroom. I hate toilets in bathrooms. It's just so wrong and intrusive feeling.

I also have working plumbing in my garage to escape to when people are around.

 

Hahahahahaha!!!

I do that shit all the time! I don't think I make anyone puke though.

 

I usually mask the toilet air with a mason jar after doing my business to release in any funny situations.
There's usually a jar or two in my grab that I can open it anywhere, anytime.

My favourite pranks are before meetings, I get a fake plastic shit I put near the boss's chair, then release the jars right before the meeting

 

Not really my "partners" but back in middle school me and two buddies had a class together and the teacher was a huge dick head to everyone all year long. Anyways, sometime during the last week of school we filled a bag with dog shit and left it on his desk with a note saying 'For all the shit you gave us this year, we're giving some of it back.'

 

This is an excellent idea! What oils do you keep in the spray bottle? I'm going to try this...

 

Stinky bathrooms can be pretty funny, and are usually tolerable for me. I really surprised myself, however, when I threw up in my mouth today. I've always had a big gag reflex, can't clean up after a dog without gagging, ect, but I never actually vomit...

 

So you actually catch the poo smell in jars and use it to expel stench and humor, as you so please?

 

I'm totally a wuss about cleaning up vomit, nasty dog shit, etc. I have no explanation for it. One time, we came home from vacation and my wife left the lid off of her chicken feed while we were gone. It rained and it was rotted and just disgusting. I went and cleaned it all out and puked two or three times. She was in the house laughing her ass off. They aren't even my damn birds! I told her I'm never doing that shit again.

 

I tolerate it if something needs to be cleaned, but 9 times out of 10 I will be gagging away the whole time. I have a very sensitive sense of smell (which I've heard is typical for people with ADD), so it tends to make cleaning up things extra gross.

Do you and your wife still have chickens? Do you have any other animals?

 

Yup. Still have them but we are down to only two of them. One of them seems to have taken a liking to me. She will come hang out by me all the time. One time, I sat down on the deck and she jumped on my knee. It's like....dude...we're not that good of friends!

I don't mind them much though. They help the yard and garden and we get eggs. They also shit all over but chicken shit doesn't bother me at all. Runny dog shit from a big dog? Can't do it.

The only other animal we have is a tiny dog....like really tiny. Our last big dog died last year and we've decided we won't get another big dog.

 

Same response as the first poster of your thread.

Though, I chuckled not at the poopy side of your story, but the fact that you said, "..it was probably something I fed him." I know you actually meant something you cooked for him, but I imagined you actually feeding him like a baby.

 

I love little dogs. I want one so badly. I love big dogs too, actually, but I don't want a big dog because I don't want to have to clean up after a big dog.

What kind of dog is your tiny one? Do you have any pics you can post? What is its name?

That is pretty cool that the chicken took a liking to you. You should try and give her a snuggle sometime. Snuggling with animals is one of the best things in the world, to me. It doesn't top snuggling with my husband (nothing does), but it is definitely up there.

 

Okay, great! I'm definitely going to try this....

 

That dog snuggles her whole life away....whether you want to or not. She's small, fast and sneaky. She can be curled up next to you or on your lap at the exact moment your ass touches the couch cushion! Not kidding. You can see a pic of her if you click my username and go to my photo gallery. Her name is Lucifer.

 

Okay, how frikin cute is she? My goodness....does she sleep on the bed with you and your wife?

 

Yup. Every night. It's amazing that she hasn't been suffocated yet. She has it down to a science though. She will be sleeping with her back pressed against my back, I'll roll over and she somehow instinctively moves and ends up in exactly the same position...only pressed against my chest.