the repercussions of not having a father?

Because if I had a dad I wouldn't be in the situation I've been in for 10 years. Therefore I would have missed the 10 years of experience that made me into the person I am now. Idk how you didnt get that the first time..?

I'm also not sure how calling myself a sociopath rules the fact out. Would you care to explain your theory? Did you ever think that I'm just smart enough to admit what I am? Seeing as you don't know a thing about me or my personality, I just don't see how you would possibly know.

I'm reading your response while writing mine and idk why I am replying to you. It doesn't make sense to try and explain myself to your ignorance. Oh well, at least it kept me busy for a while.

 

My father died when I was almost 5 yrs old...in August and my birthday is in October.

My mother never remarried, nor dated.

My uncles on my father's side were only seen at church or at "family" gatherings once a year, and fewer than than that as the years passed. The uncles on my mothers side would visit once or twice a year for a week when I was growing up, if you want to call that a father figure...but it wasn't.

I grew up with very low self-esteem even though (looking back) there was nothing wrong with my looks nor was I allowed less than a B on a report card...except I talked too much and occasionally/rarely got a C in conduct. My mother would flip out so I was no stranger to begging a teacher. lol I graduated Magna Cum Laude from college with a BS.

I had self-esteem problems until the last (perhaps) 10 years, even though I somehow knew in my heart I wasn't as I saw myself even years ago. My mother showed surprising insight that my lack of self-esteem in growing up and even way into adult-hood stemmed from my lack of a father.

I'm sorry to say, but I think sociopathology is something you practically are born with. I seriously doubt your being without a father contributes to being a sociopath. It just made it easier to "break rules" if there were no strong female role models.

Perhaps I should also relate that my mother was/is a very strong individual and was able to serve, in many ways, as both mother and father.

I had a wonderful great-uncle that taught me about being a kind but serious farmer, but he really wasn't in any way a father figure.

 

I'm sorry, you're absolutely right. I was born a sociopath because I had the mental capacity to understand the dynamics of such a characteristic before I knew how to control my bladder.

I apologize for my mistake

 

Do homosexual parents disenfranchise kids by depriving them of either the father or mother role model our species possibly evolved to require for proper development?

 

I wasn't going to type this story out but I guess I will. I'll try to keep it short.

I didn't see my dad from the time I was about 6 or 7 until I was almost 15. It wasn't my dads fault. My mom took me and my brother and kept us away from him (different states) for her own selfish reasons. We grew up poor and moving all the time. We knew she loved us but she was unstable, abusive and she told us things like "If your dad loved you and wanted to be around, he would be". She tried to completely put it on him. She tried to make her own children feel unwanted by their father for her own "gain". But she didn't count on one thing....my memory. I remembered him very well. I remembered that he was one of the most kind, loving people I had ever known and there was no way any of those claims were true. He absolutely wanted us with him. I used to quietly tell this to my little brother. I told him it was why we moved a lot....because dad is getting close to finding us. I promised him many times that I would find our dad some day and things would be different after that.

One day I was snooping around and I came across a few letters from my dad which I obviously never had been shown. It confirmed to me that he had been trying to contact us and had kept having to track us down. Now I knew where he was. The cat was out of the bag. Without telling my brother immediately, I was able to contact my dad. After that my brother and I secretly called him collect once or twice a week for a couple of months. I expected that my mom would lose her shit if she found out so it was usually from a pay phone or a friends house. Then one day, inexplicably, she confronted me about it out of the blue. I was so shocked that I couldn't think of anything to say besides the truth. In a very unexpected move, my mom suggested that we go visit him. It was supposed to be for a weekend. She drove us there. It was decided that we could stay with him for a couple of weeks....which turned into the rest of the summer. I knew then that I would never return to her and I didn't. I lived with my dad after that. I was very angry with my mom for a long time.

Did it affect me? Absolutely but this post is already too long. I came out luckier than some. I always knew what the truth was and had hope to carry me through the tough times.

 

There is no EXACT way that each person reacts to not having one or the other of his/her parents. Generalizations are useful, but some people just say fuck it--that's the way it is, while others brood about this for years. I suppose it would be the former that don't become one of the previous statistics. Thicker shell.

 

I'm a man and I grew up without my biological father.

I had a great step-dad from age 8-12 and my mother dated a decent boyfriend from when I was 14-18, although I didn't like him much and he didn't have much influence.

I have never had drug issues and only drank for roughly a year in college. Was a smoker from age 20-23 but quit successfuly cold turkey.

I suppose my sports obsession and extremely social akwardness until my early 20s may have been a result of not having a father around long, but overall my mother was a phenominal parent.

LeBron James turned out pretty good.

 

Yeah, somehow he made it to 6' 8" without a father, lol

 

I know plenty of tall dudes who suck at basketball. Being 6"1 and having played in college, I can tell you 6"8 doesn't guarantee NBA stardom. Could have easily turned to crack.

My point was he had a super mom and often times one super parent makes up for not having a second.

 

I get your point, just not into celebrity worship.

 

What happens to that child mentally and emotionally if they had a father...?

 

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I didn't have a father figure and I really don't care.

 

If you realize that there is a problem, its better to immediately turn to a psychologist.

 

If there isn't a father.. then surely it's down to the mother?

Father's get killed..die! It's down to the mother surely?

What about people with no mother?

During ww1 the amount of father's killed was massive.. those families survived because of the mother's.

 

A father just makes a baby with your mother. None of that means anything.

But a father figure I do believe is important. Little girls need to know the male perspective and little boys need to learn how to be men.

While I currently have no plans for having children--and that window is getting smaller by the day--my GF and I have talked about it, in a purely hypothetical sense, and decided that if we had a child, my GFs brother-in-law would not only be uncle and godfather, but would be the definitive male role model in our child's life.

That being said, I had a very strained relationship with my father and I haven't spoken to him in years. But he was there for my formative years, and for that I am grateful.

 

And who would father your and your gf's baby?

 

Even though I had a father, he was a hardcore alcoholic, drank from his late 30's until his early 80's when he was finally institutionalized until he died at 87. I've has never ever close to him. All through my youth and into my 20's I lacked confidence and direction something a father is responsible to instill. Thankfully my mother was always there for me and I've always and will remain a clean and sober person.

 

I think it mostly depends on your mental stability in the first place. My father leaving was devastating for my sister. She turned into a hot mess with daddy issues. I'm not saying I'm perfect, but I'm grateful I had one strong parent who did a mother and a father's job.

I'm sure lots of conservatives would say I'm gay because my daddy left and I was surrounded by women and became some depraved deviant.

My father was a loser who never made any effort after the divorce. We kept the same phone number for 15 years, he knew our address, but he never called or came around. Ran into him on the bus once three years after he left. He didn't even recognize me. And of course in court he'd cry and say my mom was keeping him from us, which was a lie. He's a pathological liar who's to this day paying back child support to my mom (I'm the younger child and I'm now 26). My thinking was, why would I mourn not having someone around who doesn't give a shit? Good riddance.

 

That sounds unlikely, he was hardcore alcoholic, but made it to 87???...and didn't start until late 30s???

Sounds like you have been swayed by a 3rd party opinion