You put on reading glasses before you roll a joint You get the munchies for a bottle of Ensure You’re going bald so you adopt a Ben Franklin hairstyle You’ve switched from acid to antacid You sit around and tell youngsters what the price of a lid was back in the day The cops pull you over and you think they’re going to search you and your car for dope, but they just tell you your turn signal has been blinking for the past 2 miles Skinny dipping? Uh...no thanks, I’ll just sit and watch
i feel old when one of my favorite bands comes to town and I could care less because the old geezers on stage do not resemble the rockers that i saw when i was in high school.....took my kid to a rock show and found myself asking ''where is the parent's quiet room''?
When you watch the footage of Arlo Guthrie from Woodstock and you have to explain to the kids that "Rappin' with the Fuzz" didn't mean he was sitting in with a hip hop group. Stay Brown, Rev J
One of my best friends does this. He rolls the best joints, too! And at least once or twice when we're listening to music he has a "Man, when I saw them in concert back in the day.." story.
When you are around a group of ppl and nobody is talking to eachother because everyone is to busy with their cellphones texting other ppl.
Don't have anything to comment but have to say that I haven't laughed so much for ages - thanks guys!
(1)...When The Highlighted Date On Your Calender Used To Denote The Date Of Your Favourite Bands Rock Concert.......But Now It Denotes The Date For Your Next Prostate Check-Up...*true story*.... (2)...When You Decide That It's Finally Time To Dread All That Long Hair, But 19 Months Later You Discover The Dreads On The Top Are More Akin To Dreadlets... *true story*.... (3)...When You Walk Into Your Favourite Chinese Take-Out And Find All The Seats In The Waiting Lounge Are Taken By Teenagers, Then One Stands Up And Offers You His Seat...*true story*.... (4)...When You Used To Boast To Your Mates You Could Piss Over The Wall In The Towns Public Toilet, But Nowdays It Just Dribbles Down Your Balls...*true story*.... Tears Glen.
(1)...When You Used To Get Totally Drunk Off Your Head And Fall Asleep For 12 Hours But Now You Have Nothing More Than A Glass *or two* Before Bed, And You Have To Get Up To Piss Every Three Hours...*true story*.... (2)...When You Could Go To A Pool Party, Get Naked, Get Drunk, Then 12 Hours Later Wake Up Naked On A Tiled Concrete Floor, Yawn, Fart, Stand Up And Start Partying All Over Again. But Now If The Electric Blanket Isn't On The Exact Setting, Your Sciatic Nerve Lets You Know It Hates You, And You End Up Cancelling The Rest Of Your Day, And Drinking Wine To Ease The Pain...*true story*.... (3)...When You Used To Have Sex Umpteen Times A Day, And With Multiple Peeps But Nowdays One Of The Side Effects Of Your Blood Pressure Med's Is Erectile Disfunction...*not quite a true story*.... (4)...You Used To Always Have The Latest " Sony Walkman", " Sony Discman", As The Electronic Device That Gave You The Most Audio Pleasure In Your Day, But Nowdays The Only Piece Of Electronics You Really Listen To Is The "Ready For Operation" Beep, Followed By The "Countdown" Beeps On Your Brand New "Omron" Blood Pressure Tester...*semi-true story*.... Cheers Glen.
hahaha! keep them coming guys! laughing so hard that I can't speak and tears are running down my face! Thanks!
I came across this this morning and got a kick out of it, thought I'd share it with you good folks. OLD” IS WHEN….. Your sweetie says, “Let’s go upstairs and make love,” and your answer is, “Choose one, I can’t do both!” “OLD” IS WHEN.. Your friends compliment you on your new alligator shoes and you’re barefooted. “OLD” IS WHEN… A sexy babe catches your eye and your pacemaker opens the garage door. “OLD” IS WHEN…. Going bra-less pulls all the wrinkles out of your face. “OLD” IS WHEN….. You don’t care where your spouse goes, just as long as you don’t have to go along. “OLD” IS WHEN….. You are cautioned to slow down by…. The doctor instead of by the police. “OLD” IS WHEN…. “Getting a little action” means you don’t need to take any fiber today. “OLD” IS WHEN….. “Getting lucky” means you manage to find your car in the parking lot. “OLD” IS WHEN….. An “all-nighter” means not having to get up to pee.
I go to dr to have blood drawn and after 2 or 3 tries i wanna slap the nurse, snatch the needle out of their hand and just do it myself.