yesterday was the worst day of my life(hope you dont mind this posted in this forum)

Yesterday I had the worst day of my life.I had to be at the hospital short stay check-in at 9:30 for my d&c. I was so damned scared because normally I dont believe in this whole thing. And I have never had anesteasia b4. Anyways, so they get me prepped by 10:30 and i had to sit around and wait for surgery at noon. It was an AGONIZING hour and a half. I didn't want my child to leave my womb until she felt ready. But no, my doctor insisted I have it sucked and scraped out. Another shitty part that i didn't like at all was the fact that they wouldn't give me her remains to do what i felt necessary doing. It didn't seem fair. I HATE the idea of my baby being thrown into the hospital biohazard bag and shipped off with peoples arms and legs and aborted children, who all deserve proper burials as well.
Hubby and I were distraught that we couldn't bury our child properly.
The doctor saw me for like 15 seconds an hour before surgery and made it very well known that my procedure better not take more then 30 minutes because she had better things to do in labor and delivery, which made me feel horrible. I felt like I should apologize that she lost mney on me because I didn't really need my child delivered.
The nurses were great to me though, bringing me any food and drink I wanted.
When I got home not a single member of my family called me or anything. I had to call them, and at least my little sister drove over to spend time with me.
I feel horrible. I am all hopped up on hydrocodone and on bed rest for 3 days. I have gained bacjk 10 pounds of the weight i lost before hand, and for nothing
And so I sit here crying and hoping nobody thingks im a weirdo because all i wanted is to at least of had the chance to say goodbye to my child
Thanks for listening everyone


****UPDATE***
We now know why I keep having miscarriages.
I have a bloodclotting disorder that causes a blodclot to form in the placents which cuts off the nutrient supply to the baby. so starting in novemeber i have to be on a regimin of baby aspirin, Vitamin B12 and Vitamin B6 to be able to ever carry a healthy baby.

 

Lots of *hugs* for you and dh. So sorry that the dr. and your family aren't more sympathetic. I can't believe they wouldn't let you bury your child.

 

I can't believe either that they treated you like that. *hugs*

 

I'm so sorry! I think it's time to find a new doctor, your wishes should have been respected.

 

eh i know oit seems like i should find a new doctor but my sister works in the medical profession and says these doctors gossip about their patients and such. so if i switch doctors, whichever new doctor i get will tell the doctor i already have that i switched and why and everything else, and thats when you start getting crappy service...it seems unfair

 

that's shitty. they should have granted you what you wanted. do you have a city near you because they may have better services and they may not communicate to doctors outside of the city.

 

this entire country is founded on healthcare providers who care more about their paycheck then the patient they are helping....so no id say there isn't

 

Is it possible to find a more naturopathic physician. I have a pretty good health plan that covers naturopaths as PHPs. They are more emotionally involved with patients, more natural in their approach, and not really in it for the money.

IMHO, midwifes and naturopaths are almost always better than OBGYNs and MDs.

 

only problem there is my insurance wont cover them

 

I'm really sorry that you had to go through that, have a big hug from me.

When I miscarried, they let me chose whether to let the remains go naturally or to have a D&C, I chose the first option, which beleive me, was no walk in the park either.

The trouble is , when they do the D&C there is nothing of the foetus left, I think they only allow burial with a foetus of a certain gestational age.
My thoughts are with you.

 

how is there nothing of the fetus left???

 

no, i knew better after last time to buy anything
i guess I will just have to do something else, I am just not sure what

 

what about a healing ceremony for the spirit. To release him/her to heal and come back healthy. Buy him/her a special candle and pray/meditate by the candle each day until it is gone.

 

awww i already do that almost every day
You read my mind eryn

 

Im so sorry. I cant believe they wouldnt let you have your child to bury. I see a midwife and shes great. I hope that you can find someone better.

 

****UPDATE***
We now know why I keep having miscarriages.
I have a bloodclotting disorder that causes a blodclot to form in the placents which cuts off the nutrient supply to the baby. so starting in novemeber i have to be on a regimin of baby aspirin, Vitamin B12 and Vitamin B6 to be able to ever carry a healthy baby.

 

so this is good news right!? I really hope everything goes well now that they know how to help you.

 

Oh that's so great that you know what's wrong- and even better, it can be fixed! *hugs* Plus, vitamin B-12 makes you happy!! Taking all those vitamins sucks but it's totally worth it! Are you also taking a multivitamin? That might be wise too just for overall health. I know vitamins are expensive (I'm on 7 because of my disease/allergies) but it's a much healthier and less invasive way of getting yourself better than medical procedures and medication!

 

Yeah, i'm glad its fixable I've been taking multi-vitamins for years and i rarely get sick and when i do its only like 3 days...anyway, I wish you all the best

xoxo