tough and hard and cold as gravel beneath bare feet this world ~is your love, with which you tell me your lies of truth sweetened with sacharin so boldly you told me such things to melt any womans heart so you say cept mine cause after you my heart no longer made of ice, but a substance like the gravel that peirces and digs into the souls of my feet as I walk home crying over the wreckage I just left but somehow still remains in my heart. to be continued.....
ok guys bear with me, this is the absolutely 1st poem i've written in about 4 years. 1st attempt, anyway, since before i was put on haldol, if any of you know what im talking about... @
I like the opening and the quick setting of the central image to dominate the poem. It's always difficult to extend the metaphor. But we must. Good luck on finishing this one!
you came to me as i was sobbing with trepidation i opened my door what happened what happened? i could smell the sweetness of intoxication on your breath but the bitterness i would endure later. so many questions you asked, laughing as i answered, 'you're feet are so gorgeous' was all you could say?... you really admire them, you're not kidding, but you're forgetting that they belong to me. Me. The Mother of Your Child, but do you care? all you see is my feet, toes painted with red just for you. These same feet, that you hold like gold walked so far for you But it is me, Me, who told them to stop. this one sucks balls. :$ <---not part of the poem
