Would you stick by your bf if he was going to prison?

I've known my gf since we were kids at school and we have been a couple since we were 17 - am 23 now. Things have always been good with us. We had started to talk about tracelling a bit, then getting married and having a family and everything was good.

A few months ago I got myself into trouble and now am looking at 2-3 years in prison. I wish I could turn back theclock but I can't. I've been in a small bit of trouble before but nothing major and not been in prison before. I was in the Army for 4 years so she is used to me being away for abit but I know this is different.

She is not happy with me and I know why. Things have changed beween us and I am worried that she might bot stick by me. I keep on saying we'll get hrew this but don't know what she'll do. I would hate it if we split up over this as we have always been there for each other.

Any advise on what I can do to make her see how much I love her and that I will sort myself out? Do you think you would stay with your BF if he was in this situation?

 

Hi Paul, welcome to the Hipforums. Sorry about your predicament. 2 or 3 years seems like a lot to young people, but it can be tolerable. She should be able to see you, and if you get married for conjugal visits, not sure otherwise.

 

Fuck, no.

Then again, I'll never have a bf.

I might stick by my gf, though. Depends on how hot she is.

 

ESTP, Donald J. Trump’s MBTI type, lives entirely in the present and
does not consider the future implications of his careless behavior

Veterans + Criminality = Veteranality

“Justice-involved veterans display unique characteristics that make them distinct from other justice-involved adults. Most notably, justice-involved veterans have served in the military and might have experienced combat. Sufficient evidence suggests that veterans are uniquely at risk for arrest and justice system involvement because they have different mental health needs than non-veteran populations (Blodgett et al., 2015). Veterans also face high risk of substance abuse, and can have difficulty adjusting to post-employment civilian life (Canada & Albright, 2014). Finally, statistics show that justice-involved veterans display higher rates of certain types of violent offenses compared to non-veterans, including sexual offenses and intimate partner violence…” (Source: DOI 10.1016/j.avb.2022.101721)

Why does it matter now how much you love her? You simply have no alternative to her now, and you want to sweeten your time in prison with her, so you want her to act against her interests and be emotionally available for someone who is absent.

Loving someone means putting their interests first, no matter what that means for you. In this case, it means advising her to find a new boyfriend who is not as selfish as you are, and who doesn't shine through physical unavailability (4 + 2-3 years). Advise her to find a more intelligent, less impulsive and more forward-looking boyfriend: if you commit crimes, you must not get caught. Prisons are collection points for losers. Unfortunately, women are not impressed by losers, no matter how persistent their vows of love are (→ hypergamy).

So you want to persuade her with promises about your future behaviour to renounce her present enjoyment of life. Who would fall for something like that?

This gives some hope that she knows what is good for her. When you are released from prison, you are free to present yourself to her again as an attractive candidate. In the meantime, however, you should leave her alone and not abuse her as a mother service provider or pen pal.

 

Depends on what lock up for

 

I think if you really love your partner,you should always stick with them no matter what.......

 

Precisely

 

You may be lucky, provided that that she was going to prison for arson.
The only problem could be if she had cooled down a bit before they let her out.

 

Here in the UK, it would probably be for parking on a yellow line.