Wife cheated, need input

The other day my wife, "friend" and I were hanging out at my place. I had to leave for a few minutes and I guess I came back a little sooner than they thought because I caught her blowing him. The other part of this story is that his fiance and my wife are also friends. She told me that nothing like this has ever happened before and that it was just a moment of weakness and I do believe her because she had never given me any indication that she has cheated before so we are going to work this out. The problem is that his fiance wants all of us to meet up and try to work it out among the four of us so we can get back to where we were before. I realize it would never be the same, but I still don't know what to do. Should I forgive so I can move on and start healing myself? Any input is greatly appreciated.

 

Dump that hoe.

He's not your friend, and she doesn't sound like your wife.

 

A moment of weakness that came about in only a few minutes? I do not buy it.

 

i don't think i'd be strong enough to forgive her. but i REALLY don't think i'd be strong enough to forgive my "friend."

if you are committed to trying to forgive her, that's as far as i'd try to go...

 

ya right...he'd be knocked out on the floor and the wife woild be out the door seconds later...there is no excuse or moment of weakness bullshit that can be believed

she ruined your marriage and now you need to walk away

personally i would fuck the fiancee of the dude and every girlfriend of your wifes that i coyuld manage

 

such a weakling if you keep this woman around lol dump her arse ASAP!

 

RUN AWAY NOW! You left for a few moments came back and she was blowing him >:O, wtf she was thinking about fucking him long before you had to leave. No excuses, and this dude has a fiance - if you get hurt again by this woman you have no room to complain in the future you've been shown a burning red flag. Honestly I think you should convey this very fact to all of them when you meet up, and bounce.

Wow that hurt my heart just reading that shit man, ouch...good luck to you.

 

If you only left for a "few moments" and they got busy, I'll bet it ain't the first time she's had a "moment of weakness" with this guy.

 

From the point of view of someone who has cheated.....there is no "moment of weakness" involved......cheating is very much a premeditated act...you don't suddenly find yourself commiting a sexual act by accident. They would have thought about it and discussed it previously....and you leaving the room bought them a moment of opportunity. I doubt this was the first incident. Its up to you whether you can forgive her and trust her again...personaly I think she owes you more of an explanation and the truth might be nice.

 

make orgie.

it concept free-love
is good.

 

She probably just tripped and fell into his lap with her mouth open.

Accidents happen. Nothing to worry about.

 

Women like this do not deserve a second chance or any kind of forgiveness.

 

I never felt like cheating is a reason to dump someone and admire that you are being forgiving. Still trust has been betrayed. I would meet with the other couple, take the guy aside and say, "If you don' t tell your girlfriend then I will. Would you consider having an open relationship? When I caught a lover cheating I told him that it was time to have an open relationship so I could cheat too. He did not like that and cleaned up his act for a while. He did cheat again but by then I was ready to leave him for other reasons. He was a control freak. That relationship only lasted a few years.

 

No offence but in regards to your opening remark, you don't make a good case for NOT dumping her (the cheater).

 

There is a reason why you want to work it out, remember that. Whether you need to work it out with your friend right now I don't think is a priority.
Look to people you can trust to give you advice not some random faceless people on the internet that have nothing to lose

 

It is your life dude and your choice! Personally I would never be able to trust someone again who did that to me know matter what the explanation. From the sounds of it she did not give you much of one anyways. For me without trust there is nothing so it would be over. Your buddy is not a buddy either, because no real friend would do that to someone. That is a friendship that would have ended with a good solid beating. If they want forgiveness tell them they can both sit back and watch as his fiance blows you. Honestly a moment of weakness that ends up with a cock in your mouth? She just sits around all day thinking of blowing guys? You don't think you deserve better then this? I would do her no favours, because she does not deserve them.

 

The relationships that last always need work. If you dump everyone the minute they step on your toes you will spend a lifetime alone. There is usually some point in a relationship someone gets tempted to cheat. Whether or not they are honest about it. I could have cheated on my husband but I chose not to and told him when I felt tempted we worked it out. He was not upset with me. He was glad that I was honest about how I felt.

Real relationships take work, communication, and patience. That is what the whole, "for better or worse" thing comes in, for marriage. I personally do not stay in relationships long. I did make an effort with my ex husband, until he got mean to the kids. So yeah, I do not think cheating is a horrible unforgivable thing. I do not need to possess or to be possessed. People who get upset about cheating act like they own their lover. To me that is sick.

 

Send her a videotape of you fucking another woman.

 

Whoa, stepping on someones toes and putting your genitals on someones face are two totally different things, not even in the same ball park. You don't need a feeling of possession to not want your partner to cheat, it's flat out trustworthiness because after all in a marriage you're business partners - it's gotta be working for both of you. Communication has to be valued and if someone is cheating they are putting less value in the relationship than you are, and if effort is not 50/50 it's not a relationship I want to be in.

Not only that but if someone is cheating their needs aren't being met, it goes beyond just the romantic victims needs - it's about mutual happiness. So TO ME, I don't want someone to have "faith" or "believe" in me, I want it to be what the evidence shows - what my actions in the relationship are to met those mutual means. Hard work is indeed needed but some is restraint.

 

Stepping on toes is one thing but I think a line has to be drawn somewhere and cheating on you with a friend is well over that line. But again it's a personal decision, I know that I wouldn't be able to get over it and it would be a taint on the relationship from then on for me. However if someone else is different and they can and do make it work then I say more power to them.