Wierdest reasons for not coming into work.

i broke my leg falling out of bed

 

Theres giant snow creatures surrounding my cabin, I ain't goin out there....:-0

 

''im busy at the farm, terry''.

 

ive fallen and I cant get up

 

i got arrested early hours for downloading torrents full of promo-release movies

 

Im busy using up my neighbors wireless router bandwidth

 

too busy losing my virginity

 

too busy losing my religion

 

Excuse me while I kiss the sky

 

hendrix is back from the dead and he's doing a one nighter in a small working man's club with tinted windows in town. if it means getting fired, then so be it.

 

I got a fishhook in my eye

 

i've god an unhappy canadian on my door step and he's charging a toll to get out the house.

 

The dog ate my penis.

 

my clock is broke

 

i swallowed my phone in my sleep.

 

im trying to pop a knuckle

 

i can't find my pants

 

ate too much garlic bread

 

i am constipated.

 

my goldfish is sick and doesnt want to be alone