Why do so many women get pissed off when...

Discussion in 'Relationships' started by MaximusXXX, Feb 6, 2009.

  1. MaximusXXX

    MaximusXXX Senior Member

    their boyfriend asks them to get STD testing??

    A friend of mine just got dumped by his girlfriend because he kept sticking to his point.

    He is a nice guy, and unlike most men period, including some of my player friends, he's very safe when it comes to having sex.

    Probably because he's only had sex with 3 women, so he's not the fast type.

    My point, he was dating this girl 2 years younger than him for near 2 months, now yes, I do think that's a while too, they saw quite a bit of eachother too, for him, he was ok with it, but the large part was the fact she kept saying she was a virgin. He's 20, she's 18, and I didn't buy it, but I told him there's always the chance.

    So about 3 weeks ago she admitted to him she wasn't a virgin and she thought guys like him, as in nice guys, would prefer virgins.

    I have no clue what context it was brought up in, but anyway, she started out with 1, then like a few days later said it was 2, then bout a week after that said it was 3, but that the 3rd one was a horrible guy that pressured her into doing it.

    So, he was fine with it, a little peeved she kept putting up the number, but that's understandable.

    So they got to the point of arranging a meet, he lives with his parents still, commuting to college, while she 's still with hers. I suggested some hotels, nice ones, so here's the good part:

    He books the hotel for 4 days after I giive him the numbers.

    He goes out and buys condoms and some other accesories for the bedroom.

    Now, 2 days before they're talking about it and she tells him how she hates condoms and will not use one. He goes on and asks her if she uses anything, she doesn't, and that she uses the pullout method, idiot I know, so anyway, he tells her she got lucky and that he will use condoms. They argue for like an hour, supposedly, and she finally agrees to using condoms.

    Now, later that day they're talking on the again, on the phone, and he tells her she should get tested for STDs, he tells her he loves her but that from what she told him he has to be sure and that he'll go and get tested with her the same day. She says she's clean but finally agrees to it.

    He cancels the booking as there's not enough time to get the results.

    The next day he talks to her about when she feels comfortable going in, she tells him later in the week.

    2/3 days later she tells him she isn't comfortable getting tested and that if it's that big a deal to him they should just wait to have sex.

    He asks her when she would be comfortable, she tells him eventually she'll get tested.

    So, fast forward 2 weeks, he's still calling her and keeping up, course she does go cold on him for those 2 weeks because of the testing, etc.

    She sleeps over at his place ( tells her folks she's at her girlfriends ) and things get hot, she does everything to get him to screw her by fondling him and giving him oral but he doesn't have sex with her actually telling her during the cuddle in she needs to get tested.

    She gets pissed off and gives him the back, as in, cold shoulder for the rest of the night.

    2 days later, she asks him why he wants her to get tested so bad, he tells her the obvious reasons, and she tells him she KNOWS she's clean.

    Now I do not know how these convos of theirs went, maybe he's an ass on the phone, but I honestly think he was being fair and calm.

    She finally gives him the ultimate bullshit, " If you love me you should trust me, and we should have sex without a condom ".

    WOW, am I right?

    He tells her she isn't being fair, she tells him he doesn't trust her and that you need trust in a relationship.

    End of convo, my buddy is single.

    So....was this one hell of a crazy bitch or are most women like this???

    In truth I've had some bad looks from gals I told to get tested, but this is unreal, why are so many women angry when their boyfriend tells them to get tested??


    And I also know of girls who hate condoms, they use the pill though, but they don't get any STD protection and also never get tested.

    What is the world coming to???
  2. Allonym

    Allonym cheesecake slut

    i dunno, why do so many guys get pissed off when you ask them to go for an std test? ive had exs get all offended that id ask them to get tested if they wanted to go condomless

    in other news, trust is important, and it sounds like it wasnt in that relationship -aside- from the whole testing issue... she sounds a wee bit crazy from your explanation
  3. MikeE

    MikeE Hip Forums Supporter HipForums Supporter

    Your friend is wise, STD testing for non-exclusive people who don't use condoms is smart.

    However, even wise people can phrase their wisdom clumbsely.
  4. audiovisions

    audiovisions Member

    Looking out for yourself and not wanting to get the gift that keeps on giving is a smart move. The fact that she is uncomfortable about getting tested says a lot, and she obvioulsy already lied so the number could be a lot higher than she says. I would say that he has good reason to keep away. If she doesn't get tested then she has something to hide.

    Also, many people may not know this but if you knowingly give someone an STD without warning them you can be subject to civil penalties. You can sue someone if they give you an STD, and you can prove that they had prior knowledge and you were not forewarned.
  5. sarahrei

    sarahrei ~Lover~

    Man, I would be happy if a guy asked me to get tested.
  6. moon_flower

    moon_flower Banned

    If a guy asked me to get tested, I would. And, it was awesome that he offered to go get tested with her....I don't get what her problem was. You have to give a reason to be trusted before you can just expect it.
  7. Hippie McRaver

    Hippie McRaver Senior Member

    FUCK THAT WHORE (not literally of course)

    I have been in the EXACT same situation, only like a bitch I backed down, so what happened? she got pregnant and I got the clap.

    Stupid whore, going to the abortion clinic isn't fun, neither is taking pills until your dick stops leaking.
  8. MaximusXXX

    MaximusXXX Senior Member

    Ouch, gonorhea is like, THE worst STD....cept for AIDS I suppose.

    Hope you got better, I hear it takes 6 months to get rid of all the effects, for some more.

    Well I'll be sure to have my friend read all the responses, you people have been great.

    And boyfriends who get offended by their girl asking them to get tested are jackasses, cause I would be happy as hell if I were dating a girl and before we got hot she asked me if I had recent test results, SUCH a turn on right? lol

    I had to ask my fiance to get tested a while back and she was ok about it but gave me the cold shoulder 3 weeks after the test results because she had claimed and still claims she only slept with 2 guys before and both were virgins before her.

    I know you can get herpes so fucking easy I get tested every 3 months to be sure.

    HSV-1 of course, not HSV-2 ( genital ), but you can transmit HSV-2 by giving oral with HSV-1.
  9. Jehovah7

    Jehovah7 Member

    If what you said is true then something is up. Your boy is right for wanting to be safe beacause those nasty diseases are scary stuff. Your boy already to a risk with oral. But for her to say no condoms after rejecting to get tested is really slutty. I'm surprised your boy hasn't ran yet. RUN!
  10. Hippie McRaver

    Hippie McRaver Senior Member

    oh yes this was 2 years ago, things are good now
  11. cutelildeadbear

    cutelildeadbear Hip Forums Gym Rat

    wow, i just think it is pretty strange that you are all up in their sex life. sounds like your friend runs his mouth. i mean i completely understand your point and his point, i just feel bad for this girl that everyone is going around talking shit on. personally, i tried to get tested for std's at planned parenthood when i first met my boyfriend (of 8 years now) and they made it hell to go through. they said there was all of this paperwork (even though i was already a patient for 2 years and had been on the pill). the clinic made all of these excuses why they couldn't do this test or that test, etc. eventually, i did go to my regular doctor, and i had no problems there getting a blood test.

    anyway, back to your point, i don't know that it is only females, and i imagine it is the way he presented it to her. i get the impression (at least from your second hand story) that he probably didn't bring it up the best way, and it probably felt threatening to her. she should still want to get tested for herself, that is just non-sense. and to not use condoms again is a really stupid move, but i'm sayin' there is a way to say something like this to someone and a way that will piss them off.

    none of us were there though (were we?) so you are only hearing his side of the story, and i know from experience that there are 2 sides to every story, then there is the truth.
  12. MaximusXXX

    MaximusXXX Senior Member

    Eh, I'm a " big brother " to a few of my friends, because I've known them for a long time and I've been told by most of my friends I handle breakups very well, and I never poke fun at my friends with their relationship problems, so, that has something to do with it, but most guys discuss their sex life with close buddies. But it's not like he told me all the details.

    The story is 2nd hand, but I met and talked with his ex several times and I got a feel of her personality, and he's not the type to try and smear someone so if he's not entirely true he's at least good enough to believe the basics, as in, her not wanting to use a condom, a lot of girls don't, most girls ages 16-20 use the pull out method, and even beyond that, it's more than some know.

    The fact she didn't want to get tested is just half and half, a lot of girls think it's on trust and most people in general are not smart enough to realize some STDs you don't feel.

    Not like he called her names.
  13. raz5

    raz5 زینب

    my ex and i were on a break and before we got back together i asked him to get tested and he got pissed off, if he asked me i'd be like sure
  14. Allonym

    Allonym cheesecake slut

    i gotta say, i really dont understand the whole being-offended-by-testing thing... its like, 'oh noes, you want to be responsible about sex and your body?! what a turn off!"
  15. rollingalong

    rollingalong Banned

    dude..tell him to forget her...and give her my number
  16. KatieMarrie

    KatieMarrie Member

    Your buddy is single. . . Good for him. . . No one needs crazy shit like that.
  17. lucyinthesky16

    lucyinthesky16 pirate wench

    wow. Well, when i first had sex w/o a condom, i insisted that we both had tests, even though he was the only one i had had sex with. (i was going on birth control, and it was a part of the process.)
    I wouldn't get mad if i started dating again (now single) and the new guy asked me to get tested. BUT i would *expect* him to get tested as well. it's a give take situation. But i could see why some girls don't want to get them. 1)they're afraid that they actually might have something (but it's better to catch it early!) or 2) IT'S FUCKING PAINFUL AND HUMILIATING! (at least for me it was!) but neither of those should deter them from keeping themselves and their partners safe!
  18. missie

    missie Member

    I would totally want a man to get tested before we got together – and would definitely understand if he requested it from me too, no matter what I claim. I think that’s only smart and fair.

    I don’t think it’s cool that she tried to seduce your friend knowing that the test was important to him. If she doesn’t have anything then there shouldn’t be any issues getting tested - even if you are or ‘claim’ to be a virgin... it’s about establishing trust before taking that next step towards intimacy.

    I hate it when people do that guilt thing “don’t you love me ? don’t you trust me ?” aaaarrhhhhh !!! you want love – you want trust – EARN IT !!

    MaximusXXXmost guys discuss their sex life with close buddies” - :leaving:
    lol I don’t know if I’d be comfortable with that. Having another man know me intimately without being intimate, know what I mean ? :p :eek:
  19. Tisha Mc

    Tisha Mc Banned

    I would not be offended if someone asked me to get tested. It's about being responsible. And if I asked someone to get tested before we slept together and they refused, there would be no sex.
  20. MaximusXXX

    MaximusXXX Senior Member

    My buddy is back on the dating scene, been seeing a girl for just over a week now and they're getting close to that stage, he told her about what happened to his last girlfriend and the girl he's dating now laughed and said she was a retard. lol.

    I am really happy for him and hope he gets laid soon.

    LOL, notice CLOSE friends, as in, you've known them for a long time. Most of my long term guy friends are not furious homophobes, hell I owe a lot of what I do in the bedroom to my long discussions while wasted with my poker buddies.

    Tis true. :p

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