I have recently gone through this strange transformation, i have gone from like, loving, caring and honest girl, to lying, bitch and selfish girl. I DONT KNOW WHY! I HATE IT I HATE IT I HATE IT! I lie to my parents ALL the time and these little white lies have become a habit, its terrible. I have also become very self centered. At first I thought it was just my behavior, but then i realized it was my thoughts as well. I am so confused, Im never happy or sad, I'm just, BLAH. I tell my bf i dont know whats wrong with me but he only backfires with "its just who you really are" but i dont know...why...is this really who i am or could their be some underlying issues causing all this negativity and bitchyness (other than PMS...)
I don't know if this will help.. but have you tried getting into meditation? I used to get like how you described, but doing meditation and yoga just calmed me down and made me see myself different. That's all i can suggest for now. x
You said it. "Habit". Try excercising your WILL and see if you don't feel better knowing that you are in control of you, and not your habits being in control of you. If you hate how you are acting, then that means you do have a conscience that works, and that means THAT a caring person is who you really are, not just some hateful bitch. Otherwise you WOLDN'T care... You just need some self discipline. If it turns out that you have NO control over your "self" then there are probably some underlying issues you might want to look into.
I think some of those things can be a sign of depression. When I was really depressed I was very bitchy, aggitated and irritable all the time...
Yeah, I agree with LuckyStripe. I'm going through depression right now and I'm bitchy and mean a lot... and I'm also very caring and kind, too. I get mood swings, lol. You're probably just going through a rough time. I feel you, though. Light up a joint, that should help for a little while. Peace.
Also, just the fact that you CARE about the changes in your behavior mean that you still have some good in you!
very true that you care if ur noticing... i think some of the things ur describing sound like your doing things you know you shouldn't be doing. are you hiding things from the folks do u love this bf of urs sometimes when i feel this way it seems like i'm taking a step back to get a running start
yeah, I hide alot of things from my parents, I've told them alot of the major things, like the drugs I've tried, bigger things like that, but i lie about where I'm going or who I'm with because they really hate my hanging out with my boyfriend at his house, so I lie to go there...yeah, i love my boyfriend, sometimes he has a hard time understanding though...I know hell eventually get it, I just hate feeling nothing, I feel like theres times I've actually tried to feel sad, just so I could feel SOMETHING
I bet you will feel better if you stop living the lie. It is such a relif to not have to lie about where your going and who ur gonna be with. I guess It's something you do when ur younger. I did it as well. bear thru these years and i'm sure things will look up.
i just recently went through a whole phase for a few years of lies, things i shouldnt have been doing, things i had done , back when i was doing harder ummmm "things" and.....what i did was i wrote all the lies down, all the things i did wrong down, all the things i wanted to not do anymore down, gave it to my parents. they flipped , but....we're groovy now. best thing is to tell the truth all the time no matter what, theres some books out there one specifically called "living mindfully" by thich nhat hanh . that book helped me so much, Breathe in, think to yourself "strong" Breathe out, Think "Mountain, so on, flower(in) , fresh(out) It helps, you think do the right thing, Yes its meditation, but it becomes a habit, it can be done everyday of your life!, I was in your position, this helped me! You'll be great
yeah, I've told my parents all the drugs I've done, they know i'm having sex, all that junk you really DONT want parents to know, and suprisingly, they didnt freak at all. But they HATE my boyfriend and hate me going to his house, so i lie about that, i cant just be like "mom, dad, im going,and you cant stop me" because then I lose the car keys, and any possibilty of going over there ever. It sucks, I WANT TO BE HONEST, it would make my life 10 times better, I'm just hoping in 6 months when I go to college things will get better (whichi i think they should, i hope..atleast i wont have to lie about stupid stuff like that.)
when i was 17 i used to date a guy that my parents didn't like. so i'd lie about it all the time..for the same reasons as you...well, turns out they were right...and ever since that relationship ended, my relationship w/ the folks flourished.
yeah, when we broke up for a month or so, my parents were so happy, but I wasn't, because, obviously, it broke my heart. It sucked when we got back together, my parents went back to nazi strict and no trust...i really just have hope for college, maybe things will get better when i dont have to report back to them ALL the time
