I am going through bad times right now and i don't know which path to take and i am stuck.My boyfriend wants his friend to come live with us since he has no place to live. he had a gambling addiction so his father wants him to move out. I don't agree with my bf and the apartment is so small so the guy will have to sleep on the couch.The bathroom is in the bedroom so he will have to knock everytime he needs to use it.My bf works nightshift so i do not want to be left alone with his friend at night.I don't know him very well and feel uncomfortable living with him. My bf wants us to get a 2 bedroom apartment so he can live with us and we all split the rent.I told my bf i didn't want to live with his friend but he told me i will get use to it since i lost my job he needs a bit more money to pay the credit card... but his friend dosen't have a job either but since his a guy he could probably get a job where my bf is working since they always hire men. I love my bf but the money is not an excuse.the rent where i currently live is $535 per month and my bf makes over 1600 per month but he never checks how much he spends so that is why he is always out of money.He said his friend will probably get a job faster than me since my bf will probably get him the job and the money will save up faster. I could be pregnant right now and this doesn't help.I don't understand my bf at all and he said if i am pregnant we will live with his friend for a year. I told my bf i wanted to leave but he wants me to stay.I still love him so that is why i am staying but his friend is coming over tommorow and i am very miserable. I don't know if i should stay or leave? If i leave i will have to go live at my brothers house and my parents are moving there too.I will probably apply for welfare until i get a job and get a new apartment.I get along well with my family and they understand my situation and think i could find a much better guy.I want to leave but i also want to stay since i have been living 2 years with my bf so i am used to living with him.The hard part is letting him go. Which path should i take? I know you can't tell me what i have to do since we all choose our destiny but what do you feel is better for me I also have this feeling i will meet someone knew but whatever insight you can give me would be very helpful right now!
The path of personal accountability and responsability is always best. Look at the way you worded your question. Seems you are waiting for someone else to support you and possable unborn child. When you lean toward connections and relationships that leave you feeling stuck and powerless you are headed toward trouble and in a downward spiral that will eventually destroy your self esteem and dreams. When someone makes you feel uncomfortable Pay Attention!!! There is a reason. Gamboling will always be his first love. Giving him acess to your bedroom when your bf is working is setting up a problem. Having a bf that does not respect your opinion and your right to say NO is also a red flag. Have you ever defined Your dreams, and why you are here? What are your personal goals for the future? Giving your personal power away serves no one in a positive way. What will you be teaching your unborn child, or future children. Having the feeling you are going to meet someone new also says a lot. The choices you have made so far are not working for your best good or interest. The only one who can help you is you. Life is an opportunty and becomes what you make of it. again the path of personal accountability and responsability are always best.
