when to talk about 'feelings'

I have come to the conclusion that I have feelings for my friend. I met her through another friend and I've been chilling with the both of them for about 6 months. I don't want to ruin my friendship with these two girls because they are the best friends i've ever had. Is it worth it to confess my feelings for this girl? I don't even know if she likes me or not, and I'm horrible at telling if someone likes me or not if they don't talk to me about it. I'm not so scared of rejection, i'm afraid to damage my friendship with both of my friends. I really don't know what to do!

 

Dial her digits, ask to hang out just you and her and see where it goes! I'm not too qualified to give advice on this matter because when this happened to me I just went for the kiss at uni while we were alone and got shot down :-(. Fortunately it was just the surprise factor and we have now been together for 8 months but thats only because she liked me too and not because of my approach. I guess it's the same every time, it all comes down to if she's feeling the same way or not. How you go about it doesn't matter unless you come across as a needy freak.

 

if u want to be more than just friends with her, then tell her how u feel, ask her out, don't wait until she meets a guy who won't hesitate to ask her out immediately. What's worse : not knowing what could happen between u two, feeling a lot of regret cuz u never tried asking her out and she's with someone else now, or taking the (small) risk of losing her friendship?
Think about it : maybe she has feelings for u too and she's too shy to admit it or maybe she thinks u'll reject her.

 

i agree with Crayola. when i was younger i had the feeling of regret for not trying... very bad feeling.
ask her out, try flirting with her first . good luck

 

I flirt with this girl everyday. I tell her I love her, I give her drugs haha. I mean, there is more to the story. I have never felt like this about anyone. I've been with a lot of people and this is a different feeling. When I met her and really before I knew her well I thought to myself 'wow, she is hands down the most beautiful girl I have ever met'. I really mean that too. She just keeps getting more and more beautiful.

I agree with Crayola too pipgirl, I don't want to regret not trying. But like I said before this girl and her friend are the only friends I have and I'd rather die than lose their friendship or make things weird between us. I guess my problem is that I don't know how she feels about me other than our friendship.

 

^ Do it or don't man... I say grow a pair (You seem like less of a bitch than some of the guys who post on here) and ask her out! Or do what I did and try and kiss her . It rarely happens but I want to hear the end of this story, good luck son!!

 

haha thanks endnow. you right tho. I mean, i've been in relationships from the 8th grade until my sophomore year in college. I just graduated college and I'm 22. I feel as though just kissing her would be awkward. I like holding hands as a first step haha. I'll let you guys know what happens if anything happens.

The best thing about my feelings is that I know it's true love. I know I will love this girl regardless of how she feels about me. To me, that is the definition of love.

 

If you love her so much, don't you think it would suck to see her with some other dude who wasn't so hesitant? And won't it suck all the more when she comes crying to you with the problems she's having with him cause he's an asshole?

Make preserving the friendship priority #1 and you can't really go wrong, IMO.

 

if you love her, the sight of her with another will hurt you.
when i didn't try and i regretted it, it was my best friend too. he then moved on. i couldn't stand seeing him with another girl, so i kind of separated myself from our group.. so i didn't try AND i lost his friendship too... (i'm telling you this because you said you didn't want to make things weird or lose her friendship)
good luck and all the best

 

Only one way to find out. And telling her how you feel doesn't necessary mean the friendship is over if she doesn't feel the same way.

 

:iagree:

 

This is always a tough time when you feel like there is much at stake. For most it's about rejection. In your case it's sounds more like a fear of loss. Loss isn't as risky of a scenario because it's within the one with stronger feeling's control to get the friendship back comfortable again. How you go about expressing your feelings is quite crucial. A request for a date is very telling. If she says "yes" you have her answer. She is interested. Building on that is the next step and again, quite crucial. Charm, confidence, smart dresser, good manners....all will often win a girl over.

 

I really appreciate everyone's advice! I went ahead and told my friend how I feel about her. I stressed the importance of not changing our friendship because it is way to important to me to ruin or anything. She said she is into someone else, and i'm ok with that. My feelings will remain the same regardless of how she feels. When in doubt, honesty is really the best way to go.

 

i'm glad you told her. at least you know how she feels, right? she can always change her mind later, you never know .
and and you seem to have told her in a really cool way, so you won't ruin your friendship .
all the best