When the Opportunity Arises

Are you selective to a particular friend/partner, or are you one of the guys who goes out looking for anyone he could get off with? If I couldnt feel totally at ease with a friend, I couldn't be comfortable enough to really enjoy the opportunity.

 

I just don't feel safe going out and hooking up with the first guy (or gal) that catches my eye. If I don't know and trust someone, I can't feel comfortable allowing myself to be vulnerable around them.

 

If I meet guys online I will chat with them and exchange pics. Do my best to try to get a feel for what they are like. Meet in public after a bit of vetting, which usually, if they agree and show up, tells me that they are worth my time. 9 times out of 10 we go to the next step.

I do a lot of traveling and for some reason I’m pretty good at spotting guys that are willing at hotel bars. Strike up conversations and get a feel for them. Take them to my room and get down to business. Mostly married guys but it’s all good.

 

Back in the day I rarely turned down a guy in need of a good blowjob. Met many married men at the gym either wanting mutual oral or just wanting a warm mouth. These days I stick with my man and his wife along with a few male friends we have.

 

My FB has brought a few guys around for blowjobs and such, but I haven't gone out looking, don't know that I would be comfortable with that.

A while back I was wearing a rock band t shirt and met a guy who also liked that band. Turned out that he was desperate for a blow job, that went well.

 

I've done the cruising spot blowjob thing a few times, glory hole blowjob thing a few times. Otherwise, I host. Facetime or similar. No drinking or drugs or weirdos. Quiet clean, discrete, blowjob only. I've skipped over people, but mostly have had good luck.

 

It’s definitely preferable for me to have a friend that I gain a level of comfort with. Familiarity adds so much for both of us. We get to know what the other likes and dislikes. I’ve done this both ways and the one and done encounters aren’t nearly as rewarding.

 

Anyone who isn't my idea of an asshole is good for me. I learned to be opportunistic because you never knew where your next dick would come from or who it could come from. I trust my instincts, too, so if they tell me that this guy is bad news, he gets turned down, no questions asked. Having a FWB is nice and convenient but "settling" for one dick wasn't my idea of fun.

 

In my first 20 years of cocksucking, I just went for the easiest route to satisfy my gay lust after building it up with gay porn and fantasies once or twice a week, heading out to one of the bookstore arcades, porn theatres, back rooms of gay night clubs, or mostly bathhouses and gay sex clubs in whatever city I was living in or near. 200++ cocks later I went apeshit on a young twink's ass in a bathhouse 10 years ago and finally lost my gay virginity, as a top, which was the greatest sexual experience of my life and changed everything. I stopped all anonymous stuff, and just went on gay apps and hookup sites to vet the guys that I would get together with in each other's homes. The intimacy in those encounters are just much better, and it remains my favourite thing to do for casual sex. But it's also very frustrating with lots of no-shows, liars and straight guys that only want their cocks sucked. In 10 years I've only been back to a bathhouse twice, and that's only within the last 18 months, because I put the home encounters on temporary hiatus in 2022 while I try to get rid of this extra Covid weight, unsuccessfully so far (I'm not that much overweight, but I'm still self-conscious about it and don't feel attractive, which affects my performance with a guy).

But ultimately I've always wanted a FWB to get together with on a weekly basis, really like each other, do lots of friendship stuff together, and fuck like rabbits. I just haven't had any luck in finding such a guy, at least not yet in the approximately 15 in-home get-togethers so far in this decade since losing my gay virginity (there was a 3-year relationship in there with a woman whom I remained monogamous to, though she didn't, and that ended just before Covid hit). In the New Year I plan to get back to my swimming pool laps and ramp up those get together's and see whether my odds improve. I'm definitely tired of the one night stands, and especially the suck/fuck-and-go encounters. I want more intimacy and closeness with a guy.

And now in the last 18 months, I've developed romantic feelings for two different guys (unrequited), a first for me. So I am actually open to even falling in love and having a boyfriend finally, and so I've been getting together with a large gay social group at bars and restaurants for chitchat once or twice a week and connecting more on nonsexual levels, with the hope of meeting at least a FWB, if not a boyfriend. But the vast majority of the guys in this gay group (I've probably met 50 guys so far) are in gay partner or marriage relationships. But I still believe it's the best way of at least dating guys (real dating, not hookups--though of course dating with sex) and perhaps finding a boyfriend. But I'm still going the route of the hookup apps and sites in the New Year for more intimate, non-anonymous casual sex, with the intention of finding a regular fuck buddy. But to tell you the truth, it's just becoming too much effort to continue to experience all the few hits and many misses with these methods of expressing my ever growing gay side. I am so ready to settle down with one gay FWB fuck buddy or a boyfriend. I have zero interest in having sex or romance with a woman again, though I still find them attractive and develop desire for them. Instead, I realize that all along I've been mostly gay, and it's time to live that truth.

 

Best part of FWB is never having to wait. My last FWB would come over at the drop of a hat, and there were times we sucked each other dry every day for a week.

I get you on opportunity. I'm a little more active than normal and decided I'm no longer going to go without and to let myself have what I want, but within reason.

 

I'd never say that having an FWB is a "bad" thing but schedule conflicts can come into play, which is understandable... but opportunity can come along while waiting for an FWB to be available, right? I'd not be of a mind to let an opportunity pass me by in favor of an FWB's dick and no matter how good it is or to let opportunity go by the wayside holding out while looking for an FWB.

Good dick is always where you can find it. I agree with you: Why deprive yourself when you don't have to? Still gotta be smart and reasonable about things.

 

I have to be totally comfortable and on friendly level with anyone I share my cock with. I can trust them a little more to be clean and careful with hygeine.

 

Sounds just right.

Someone I can be comfortable with for hooking up and trying new things safely and and discretely

 

Just no friends around here who share my interest in sex with men. So I'll have to find them elsewhere. As soon as I know I'll have to travel alone, I start looking on forums like silverdaddies. I do want time to exchange some emails, ask and answer questions. If that works out well, exchange photos. Finally meet in a coffee shop or so and then, if we both agree, go to his or my hotel. Never 100% guarantee, but my experience is that after a few emails you start to get a pretty good idea of the other. If there's even the beginning of doubt, I don't go.

And it's soooo exciting to meet someone the first time and have sex.

 

Totally agree. Being comfortable with the person allows me to be more relaxed to enjoy it more.

 

Well you definitely gave the best course. Take your time, talk/chat, meet to feel them out, then proceed from there.

 

I live in a rural area where opportunity doesn't come along often.
I watch for ads on doublelist and have an ad up.
If someone responds and our schedules line up, then we're hooking up.
The odd time I get a bad feeling and abandon the situation. Most times guys just ghost me before arranging a meet up.
Met up with a guy the other day. I had a meeting in a town a couple hours from home, I had put an ad up in that area a few days before, planned to go over and blow him right after my meeting.
My meeting was with all women, and I was so turned on talking to them, knowing I was going to be sucking a dick right after.
Met at his place. I think he was older than he said... he answered the door with no pants on. I played and sucked him and let him suck me, but he never really got hard and was pretty small (3") he didn't seem nervous and did cum eventually.
It was an opportunity, they're not all great, but I don't regret it.

 

It's a shame he lied about his age. If you are going to get intimate with someone you want to start on some level of trust.

I haven't sucked any dick yet but if someone lied on their profile I wouldn't want to reward it

 

A lot of guys tell little white lies like being younger or older than advertised and I don't find that to be a deal breaker as long as there are no big lies being told. I learned a long time ago to never believe anything a guy is going to tell me and to find his truths for myself.

 

I remember a guy telling me through emails his cock was 8" so I arranged a meeting so I could suck him off. I arrive and he drops his pants, and he was barely 4" and already hard. I said, "That is not 8" dude!"...I said, you think the truth wasn't going to be exposed? I walked away.