What's The Strangest Shit You've Had In Your Pockets?

I once found an 800 year old lead Papal Bull seal in my jacket pocket. I don't even know where the fuck I got it, dunno where it is, either. It disappeared along with my cufflinks and television remote about 7 years ago. Maybe the ghost of Pope Gregory IX came back for it?


What's the strangest sh*t you've ever found in your pockets?

 

I found an Egyptian Ring and a Machete in an old Air raid shelter when i was a Kid I had that Ring for Years !
Dont know What Happened to it But I dont Have it now
They Took the Machete off me for cutting a kids head that hurt my Brother

 

I tend to not put shit in my pockets... It gets my keys slimy.

 

Bottle cap? I dunno, normally of it's something cool or important I won't put it in my pocket.

 

chicken balls

 

Melted cherry flavored chapstick.

 

Not exactly my pockets, but I reached into an old backpack without looking once and put my whole hand through a rotted piece of fruit. Actually, I couldn't even tell what it was at first, since the room was dark and the thing was decayed beyond recognition. The smell was so sickly sweet, and the texture was mealy and slimy and awful. Admittedly, I don't even know if it was a fruit. I just hope so.

 

mushrooms..
caterpillars..

 

When I was a kid my mother was doing the wash. As she was emptying my pants pockets she pulled out a bird skeleton that I had found.


After awhile she picked herself up off the floor.... Poor Mom.

 

an alarm clock, and tyre weights, a full size diesel locomotive break handle, a 'holey' stone (a stone with a hole in it formed by nature, said to show you truth if you look through it), a gold nugget i panned myself, various small live creatures, small toys and models of various kinds, a lazer pointer, a jack knife with fork and spoon blades, and another with a bunch of different wrenches and screw drivers, odd keys that went to strange things, transit tokens from places i've never been, photographs of alien life forms, a number of very small scientific instruments, a flint and steel eternal match, a snake bite kit, a tyre and tent patching kit, chocklet malt flavored food tablets, one of those little survival kits consisting of three bullion cubes, three water proof matches, a paper clip, a stick of chewing gum, a small tube of disinfectant and a band-aid, a spray bottle of unguintene, that looked like a little fire extinguisher, 'chinese' finger traps, alagator clips, low voltage jumper wires with alagator clips on the ends of them, forcepts, exacto knife, balls of various kind of threads and strings, white boards, i.c.'s and microcontrollers, r.f. gate key, possibly more then one unidentifyable alien artifact, found in the woods or lying disgarded on a road or sidewalk, lots of nuts, bolts and assorted, sometimes cryptic hardware, a very small slide rule, felt pens and notebooks, those little screw drivers with the pen clips on them, non-metalic tuning wands, a wooden flute and a tin whistle, a charged capacitor and a mouse trap, dust masks, little jars of paint and paint brushes, a professional grade world war two era lensatic compas, pretty colored rocks i had no idea what they were, a malachite cat, an instamatic camera, film cassettes for it, 35mm camera and film for it, digital camera with spare batteries and ram cards for it, beef jerky back when you could afford it and the salt wouldn't kill me, blood pressure pills now that it would, i don't know, i can't really think of anything that would be particularly unusual. although i think pretty much anything that would fit in a pocket has probably ridden around in one of mine at some time or another in my life.

 

A flat-fish!

 

a snake

 

polyurethane black pigment

 

another pocket. who decided that jeans need a pocket within a pocket? seems excessive.

 

People used to have things called pocket watches... I know, it's before your time.

 

hell, wristwatches are almost before my time...



alright, i concede that there may have been a purpose at one point. i don't see why they're still bothering to put a pocket watch pocket in modern pants though. "because that's how we've always done it" is literally my least favorite excuse for doing anything.

 

Yeah... But that's the reason.

 

I can carry a 12 pack of beer in my army jacket...three in both of the hip pockets and three in both of the breast pockets. I used to wear it when we went camping/hiking during cooler weather. I still wear that jacket too; I've had it for 29 years.

 

back when i lived in the freshman dorm (no alcohol allowed), i was able to hide an entire case on my person. i don't remember exactly how, but there was something like 5 or 6 hidden in each pant leg, 3 in each arm, a few in pockets, and a few just somehow strapped onto my torso.

 

Poor Mom indeed. While doing the same thing many years earlier she found a flattened frog in my pocket.