What's bothering me these days.

Discussion in 'Relationships' started by wawoo, Aug 17, 2013.

  1. wawoo

    wawoo Member

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    I met a girl 3 weeks ago. The first date went well, we hugged at the end of the date. The second date we went to see a movie and had dinner together in a decent place. Everything was quite pleasant. We did not kiss till then. I know I need to do something on the third date, so I took her to a beautiful place. After some pleasant chatting, we kissed, we held hands while walking around. I thought everything was going the right direction.

    Then the forth date, she went away with her family at a vacation place. Instead of coming back to our city to have our 4th date, she asked me to drove down there. Which I was surprised. I mean, it's too soon to meet the family right? But I really like her, so I agreed. that's where thing went south. After I arrived, she just acted completely different. She felt stiff when I held her hands, she was not relaxed to be near me, and avoided direct eye contact with me. I understand her family is around, it could be a little awkward. But they were not in the same room as we were. In the evening, I had some good talk with her brothers and they all like me. But still, I have showed my affection side and got no response from her. We slept in the separate room that night. (It was cold and could not sleep well). Next morning, after everyone left the house, she walked in and saw me awfully quiet. and asked what's bothering me? I told her I was confused. She told me that my "attention" made her uncomfortable. But I was merely picking up what was left from the third date. I told her, I like her and asked whether she has feeling for me. She said, she's not as affectionate as me. The situation felt like we were not on the same page here. Then I asked, "I could have slow down if you told me this. It's okay if we are not on the same page here. I understand, having your family here made things a little awkward. But what worries me is, are we on the same book here?"
    So she asked me to give her some time to think about it. And that's where we left it hanging.

    It's a little upsetting, we both thought things should go more smoothly after the third date. I have no idea what's going to happen next. Believe or not, at the end, we hugged and had a little quick kiss on the lips. I just can't believe I drove 4 hours within a day but shit still happened to me.

    Thank you very much for reading my post, i just have to get it off my chest.
     
  2. calgirl

    calgirl Senior Member

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    It kind of makes sense. Some dont like pda. But underneath they have affection. Another thing, its too soon to know these things about each other yet so just be glad there are learning moments and no deal breakers yet.
     
  3. wawoo

    wawoo Member

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    I thought when a girl says "I need time to think about it" is a polite way to tell you we are done. She did ask me "whether this is a sign that we are not good for each other". i said, "i can not answer that question for you. i could only be honest to myself about my feelings. i could hold my horse but you need to be honest to yourself as well". What confuses me is, if you don't have feelings for me why tell everyone in you family about me and let them meet me?
     

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