I havent seen a gay friend of ours in a couple of years. Back then his partner ended up in jail and one night I stopped by his house and we ended up having a serious makeout session. Good god could he kiss. It was too brief as I had to get back home. The other day we ran into him at an event for a mutual friend. Damn he looked and smelled good. His hug was intense. Another hug as we parted ways and I wanted him. He said he was no longer on social media and his BF was in jail again, but he said "you have my number"! WTF do I do? I don't want to scare him off and I also don't want to lose an opportunity to reconnect with this sexy man. I love women, but this guy is different. I'm pretty sure my wife senses my desires for him. I don't think she'd be happy if we hooked up. Why should she care as we haven't had sex in 4 years? Do I text him? What would I say? He's all I have been thinking about. Suggestions?
Nothing has happened yet, he's just a freind. Now it sounds to me that you have fantasies about hooking up with a guy. It might not lead to anything but you obviously get along well. You have made out with him before, you seem attracted to him. I'm only attracted to the sexual experimentation side but haven't tried. Many will say don't cheat on your wife and others may think life is short and it's something you want to do. If he can be discrete and no one is hurt then it's your life. Have a beer, if the conversation heads toward hooking up make it clear it's gotta be discreet and it's not exclusive. You just want to hook up with him because you think he is hot.
well if he's all you are thinking of then I reckon you should contact him. As to your wife ..well it would be best if you get her acquiescence but if the desire for him, or a guy generally is there then you should not live a lie either. You met him two years ago presumably without your wife knowing so it's not that you are not prepared to cheat on her but more worried she finds out. Your profile says you are 60...our sexuality can be fluid and often can change as we get older so maybe you should talk with your wife. Simon
Yes, discussing it with your wife is recommended for sure but it's not always easy for a man to talk to his wife about having fantasies of being with another man. I wasn't able to do so in my first marriage and ended up discretely hooking up with other men. Yeah, I have some regrets about doing so but being the marriage was ending I'm also glad I did because it opened an entirely different chapter in my life. It's a tough choice to make for sure and one that only you can make. Good Luck
Thanks for your responses. I met this man through my wife. They've been friends for years. NO WAY I could talk to my wife about this. She'd be out the door in 60 seconds and ruin me.
I read over your initial post again and I think this man wants to get closer to you. If you're unable to talk this over with your wife (I fully understand why) then perhaps discuss it with him. Find out his intentions and is he ok with proceeding into something with you and keeping it from your wife.
I don’t see any problem if it’s going to be a fwb arrangement on the dl. Especially if your wife has cut you off 4 years ago.
I think that might be a common response. Unfortunately not everyone is open to new things. Probably less that are open to sharing but apparently it does happen. Sounds a physical attraction , I don't think you are trying to marry him. It's your call if you can hookup with no regrets , you might only do it once andaybe she would rather not know than uproot everything because you tried sex with a guy. You made out with him previously, I'm sure you can open the conversation with him, he's kept that part quiet for years.
