I've always found sex toys for men disappointing. What I find most erotic is my mate's orgasm, so my preference would be any of her preferred 'power tools'; with or without me.
If I had to choose something, I guess it would be one of those mouth toys. I've used a few but I have to be real horny and lacking a real mouth for me to enjoy it. Sure, it always feels good to have something wrapped around your shaft but it's just not a great substitute for an experienced mouth and a nice woman. The Aneros feels good up there but I just can't get off using it alone. I can stroke myself off with it in there but it doesn't really give me a better orgasm. I've had a professional prostate massage that gave an awesome orgasm...maybe the best I've ever had...but she used her finger and she was far from a toy.
It depends what he’s likes and what you’re both comfortable with. A Fleshlight is good as you can use it with him or he can use it solo. Does he like butt play? Do you like anal? We both do, and starting smaller toys we worked our way up to each of us giving each other our asses. I love how sexy my wife looks when she walks into the bedroom wearing her strap on. Not some ass buster. Maybe one that is a good solid 6”. You can always go up there. Good luck
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