[I'm new here by the way] Man, I just hate the way I feel. And the funny part is, I'm not a generally sad/anxious/depressed person the begin with. So here's my position here. I love meeting new people, I'm open to new experiences, and I'm generally a pretty chill guy. But for some reason, whenever it comes to somebody being angry with me, or belittling me/making comments about me, I get really nervous. I mean, the whole nine yards - sometimes I get red in the face, I can't keep eye contact anymore, my heart races... oh, and now a new one - my bro got angry with me earlier today and I actually felt TEARS well up in my eyes. I almost cried over a stupid argument, out of the fact that I hate it when people release any kind of negative energy toward me. I don't know what any of this means, but I feel so pathetic. I feel like a little kid or something, I'll have a normal conversation with somebody and the minute they have any kind of unfriendliness toward me [sometimes even just in their voice], I feel like I'm going to die [or in today's case, just start crying in front of them]. Wow, I'm even crying right now. Maybe I am just really pathetic I mean, am I just caring too much about what people think of me? Normally people have good reasons for these problems they have, but nothing really traumatic has ever happened to me. As a matter of fact, I love my life, myself, my family, my friends.... but what the fuck is wrong with me?
It takes a man to cry. When someone ask you why you're crying, you tell them its because you're man enough to cry. You got to learn to take criticism. Nobody likes it, but it will be heaped upon you by the bucketful in the years ahead. Learn to have faith in yourself. That will become your deflector shield. x
It's not like I generally cry when this sort of thing happens, it's just that it's built up to this point where I feel completely cornered or something. And the funniest part of all of this is that this never used to be an issue at all - I would just be a prick back to whoever it was that made me feel this way. But for some reason I just can't hide it anymore and it's starting to show more and more. Man, it definitely sucks though. I'll tell you that much
You're more of a man to cry about how you feel than to show aggression back. Being sensitive of your emotions and knowing how you feel is really important and many people ignore it and suppress it. I'm glad that you've recognized it so you can start to deal with it. There are some anxiety disorders that do that. I, myself have suffered from that (in combination with serious depression). Counseling can be really effective if you've got the right counselor. Regardless of whatever disorder or no disorder, or whatever it's a really good idea. There are social worker counselors and psychologist counselors. They're both very helpful but take a different approaches to do it. Look into it. Another option is medication. I take medication which helps keep me stable so I can be more functional. It's not a crutch and I don't rely on it; it can keep you stabilized so that you're in control of your emotions yourself. I highly recommend both options and you need to look into both and decide what you need to do. You're not alone, man. Feel free to PM me anytime you want... Good luck!
Yeah man, I guess recognizing it is the first step. Somehow just admitting it to myself has made a pretty good difference already. I've been realizing more and more that my weak point is caring way too much about what others think of me - in the way that I want everybody to like me, and if they don't I start to feel uncomfortable. I guess the best thing to do is just accept either case and just be honest about shit. You can't have everybody on your side, right? The only problem I have with medication is the fact that it's definitely not right for me - I've never had a shot, never taken ANY kind of medicine [apart from aspirin in very small doses] and I usually go the natural way. However, I'm a bit of a caffeine-aholic, so that's probably not the best thing for me either . In either case, you're right about that controlling emotions thing. I guess my big lesson through all of this is to not try to control somebody else's perception of me, but rather just let it go and fuck what they think.
Your post really sadend me, I was going to post to it earlier but I had to run. Listen you're not pathitec, try to erase that thought, that idea from your mind. It is okay to cry and sometimes it is good for you. It cleanses your soul. I don't know you or whats going on in your life but I think maybe when you know your confronted by someone (your brother for example) and your upset with whats going on, walk away go to you room or some where you feel safe and just sit down with your self and feel what you are feeling. If you sad then be in that feeling for a moment. etc. The worst thing you can do to your self is to bottle it all up inside you. I wish you the best of luck. And don't forget to smile peace.
your not alone...like that dude said above me, it takes a man to cry. still, im pretty sure this happens to everyone. look for evidence of this in other people, youll see everyones like you/ no one wants negative energy projected towards them
Definitely never be afraid of yourself or what others think of you - let out your emotions gradually so that they don't build up. Remember to release these emotions when they're prevalent - don't wait. Just do it now
