This is my first post but it is something I have been struggling with understanding about myself. As a child, I was always considered "daddy's girl" because of how much attention he gave me. The trouble began when I hit puberty. I hate to admit but around the age of 11, I caught my dad looking at me inappropriately (at my chest especially) but I thought nothing of it, maybe I was in denial that he was actually doing so. I felt uncomfortable nonetheless, not only because my dad was looking at me there, but because as a growing 11 year old, I was already ashamed of my body's changes, especially my budding breasts that seemed to always stick out. One moment that always seems to resurface in memories I think traumatizes me to this day. At the same age of 11, I was in hurry to go out and my dad insisted on helping me put on a jacket before I went out in the cold and as he was zipping it up, he paused, rubbed one of my budding nipples over my shirt and referred to it as my "titty." This moment lasted for several minutes and I didn't recoil because of the shock I was in. I didn't want to believe my dad was doing something wrong, and would not let go of the thought that my dad still saw me as a kid (which I was wrong, he knew I was growing.) I felt humiliated, and still do, after that moment, especially that he referred to my breast as a "titty." That was the only inappropriate incident in which that occurred and since then I unconsciously recoil when my dad touches me at all. I never spoke of it because i refuse to believe i was molested. But was I? Even if it was my breast? Or am I disgusted at my dad's choice or words when it came to something I was already ashamed of?
Wow!!, Thats a tough one. I dont want to say what I really think because if you have a good relationship with your pa, I'd hate to interrupt that. Honestly, I think that was highy innapropiate. I'd have a tremendous issue with any friends of mine, had I known they had done something like that. In fact, my friendship would likely cease at that point. Good luck with this and I hope you can move past this and pick up a nice life with your father.
it WAS "molested for real," it just wasn't as severe as many victims suffer. i hurt for you. good luck.
that IS molested for real. it is definately wrong what he did. i was in the same situation, not knowing if what happened to me was really inappropriate, or if i was blowing things out of proportion. but if it made you uncomfortable or humiliated you then you have to decide if your relationship with your dad is really worth covering up the disgust that i'm sure you are feeling. um, i don't think i phrased that last sentence right, but you know what i mean...
I agree....it was "molested for real"...maybe the person who wrote that has never been violated in that way. ANY kind of inappropriate touching is molestaion. And girls usually get in from a family member...sorry you are going thru such a tough time..
I can't believe someone actually said "molested for real" like, some form of molestation is not as real as others. That might be true to a degree if we are talking about severity, but it's not like there are real and false molestations. Geesh. I would be so traumatized if that happened to me.
it was innappropriate and your relationship suffered with him as a result but he didn't take it any further. meaning, if he was prone to molesting you, he didn't follow through with it and stopped himself. still, he let his guard down there and exposed some intentions that fathers shouldn't have for daughers. that's dissapointing. thank god he didn't pursue anything else. if you have a relationship with him and you have daughers, i wouldn't trust him to always make the right choices. we don't get to choose our parents, darn it.
