Virgin at 28 (Need advice)

Hey guys and girls.

As the title suggest Im 28 male and still a virgin. I'm about to have sex for the first time with a girl that im not in relationship with but we were chatting for a while and been sending pics and all the good stuff. The way we chat she thinks that i have plenty of experience based on the massages on what we'll do what I'll do and such.

She is way more experienced and a bit older so im just concerned that she will be able to tell. Telling her is not an option so if you have any pointers would be cool.

Im pretty confident, I think it will naturally come on what to do, ive been watching porn with years, i dont have any anxiety issues it just didnt happen with the past girls.

Whats imortant here? Should I just live in the moment and do stuff that I feel like doing? Will I be able to pull off good fucking or its just not possible the first time? If so, why not?

A few things im concerend about is how to stay inside her (my fear is that i wont be able to tell how far to go inside and out) and cumming too fast, also the rytham, im afraid it will be non consisten. Also, should i go forceskin pulled back or not in the condom?

We plan to have sex for a few days at least, will I be able to perform FAR better the 5th time with her?

 

Ask her what she likes.
Just be gentle and not just ram it in and drop your load (it is where she wants it). And does she get protection from the expert swimmers is up to her.

 

It is quite possible you won't be able to cover the fact you are a virgin. What I would do is confess to her before meeting up. By what you wrote you haven't admitted either way yet. Be honest about your level of experience. Let her know how charged you are to meet her and that you would love it if she were to be the one to show you what it is like to be with a woman for the first time. It's very possible she will rise to the challenge and be more than willing to continue the relationship.

For your first pussy take it very slow. Don't rush to get to the promised land. I take it you have never met her. Sexting is quite different from actual face to face conversation. If the initial contact goes well flood her with compliments to start. As you get busy insist that you undress her. Do so slowly and admire every part of her body. Yes, live in the moment and do what comes naturally to you. Explore her from head to toe with your hands and mouth. Let her open up her prize and allow her to disrobe you as you go along. If you get to excited and ejaculate it isn't the end. Don't apologize but let her know this turns you on so much you couldn't help it. Then continue to explore her. Find her clitoris with your tongue. Let her take the lead and show or direct you to where she wants you to lick. Once she's nice and wet, hopefully orgasmed, you will let nature take over and be ready to climb aboard. She'll let you know when its time. If you use a condom pull the foreskin back, lube the head of your cock, and then put the condom on. Or better yet let her put it on. Whatever you do use lube inside the condom. Even experienced women don't understand how this enhances the fuck for you. Otherwise let her show you the way. Once you are mounted inside her pussy slide in and out slowly and deeply. Find a good rhythm, not like in porn, but a good slow pumping rhythm. The tension will build and you will orgasm again and again. Repeat this scenario over and over for the next few days. By fuck number 5 you'll be a pro.

 

After some thought, take her to a movie and hold hands.

 

Cool, thanks, why would you think that I wont be able to cover the fact that I havent had sex before? Is there a particular reason that comes to mind apart from the fact that I may be nervous?

It should be different based on the age I would think. For example at 16-18 yrs old I would probably be way more clueless on what to do but at my age its a bit different wouldnt you say? I guess you can argue that at her age she will be able to tell too cause of the experience but can I just say something like - its been quite a while since I've done it?

 

Perhaps have the first round with oral - you'll get off quickly with that. Then you go down on her while you are recovering and you'll be able to last much longer with round two when you do fuck. Yeah, pull your foreskin down before the condom goes on and lube inside like Barry mentioned. Condoms don't always go on easy in a hurry, so try one out for practice. Condoms break for lack of lubrication, so if she need it, use it. Once you're in,take your time and develop a rhythm, see what she likes and just go with it, she will let you know if it's too deep. If you cum quickly, you cum, just keep going, you'll stay hard for thirds. Just have fun and enjoy it. You have lots of time... Be respectful and appreciative, but don't be afraid to take charge a bit.

As for telling her....I don't know, I'm inclined to begin with 'oh it's been a while' if you go off quickly. Don't freak about that. My first was an education, but by the time the night was over, we figured it out.

 

People can sense things where they have experience. If she has had several partners she will suspect if you haven't any experience. It's like driving a car. You can tell pretty quickly if the driver hasn't driven much. Nervousness will give you away in a heartbeat. Regardless of age doing something for the very first time is daunting until you get the hang of it. I know from experience if you let her know you are a virgin she will be more eager to have sex with you.

Here's my story. I was 6 or so years younger than you are when I gave my virginity to an older woman. I didn't tell and she didn't ask at the time. It just didn't come up. We began to have sex, with a condom, and it wasn't going well. No lube on the inside, wrong size, I was so excited to get my first pussy I was fumbling all over the place. After a while she asked what was wrong. I admitted that I couldn't feel anything with the condom on and that this wasn't what I expected. She asked what I meant by not feeling anything and while trying to explain I admitted this was my first time. Upon hearing that she perked up, took the lead, and taught me how to do it properly. BTW, we ended up losing the condom right then and there. It was a fantastic evening and affair from that point on for several months. We ended up going in different directions due to the age difference among other things. But her knowing I was a virgin made it all worthwhile and I have a wonderful memory of getting my first pussy.

For some reason it's a real turn on for people. If she questions you during your encounter and she finds out you are trying to cover it up, especially during a very intimate moment, that could end the evening and the relationship altogether. Swallow any pride you have and be honest with her right now. Everyone is a virgin at some point in their life. Having real sex with a beautiful woman for the first time can be a very memorable experience. If you fuck it up it becomes a bad experience. Be honest. It's so much better that way.

 

Sounds surprisingly familiar !!

 

Make sense. Thanks guys. I think I'll just stick with not telling her and if things dont go entirly well I'll just tell her...

She keeps telling me how she wants for me to take a charge and even go rough which I plan to do but beeing the first time it could be tricky to do it... She wants proper pounding and I guess we'll have to see if I can pull it off right from the start.

I just need some words of encouragment that it is possible lol. It cant be that hard, right? Is there really a differance between a guy who have done it a couple of times only and a virgin?

I read a few posts that people in simular situation as mine did pretty well and their partner wasnt able to tell, so Im hoping I get to be the same...

Any other pointers? What if I get condom thats lubed on the inside? Is that enough?

 

Depends on the condom. Some say lubed but are only essentially lubed enough to let them unroll. Pick up some lube, better to be prepared. Get some of those one use packets, as not to be pretentious.... The only condom I have ever seen lubed enough was the trogan ecstasy, plus they are bigger at the head so you can move around in it and maybe feel something...

Oh, just relax. Mankind has propagated for millions of years without an instruction manual or a score card. You will do just fine. You got this one.

 

My first time she was in my car with one leg over the back seat. It was not her first time and I went all the way in and I did not tell her about me. A car turned around and it lit up her leg with their headlights. I think I lasted about 45 minutes and she put her leg down.
Then a light lit up my car and it was a cop holding the flash light on me.
He said what are you kids doing and I answered nothing.
He said the park closes in about fifteen minutes with a grin on his face.
I could of hugged the cop as he gave us enough time to finish.

 

Cool, thanks @Twogigahz. Can you recommend a few lubes? I aint never been using them obviously so dont know which one nor a brand lol.

@lapush awesome lol. Was she able to tell it was your first time?

This girl is a bit older than me so I dont think Ill leave to her expectations at all especially since she shown she wants me to take control. Fucking should be straight forward fml, it seems to me that I'll know what im doing and look like a had a few pussy at least, but then so is driving a car and when is your first time you suck at it bad

I guess I need someone to tell me that they were pretty good or at least decent. I guess if we get around the 5-6th time in a few dags ill be able to perform way better and just blame my first time on something else. What do you think?

 

It was the first time in my car. We were taught pretty well by the farmers daughters. Just let the girl be in-charge of herself and she will not forget you when you need a favor.

 

The main thing is to be calm and gentle

 

Cool, I'll guess I report back on what happened and how was it. Fingers crossed it will be perfect

 

Be careful Buddy. Girls don't like kiss and tell.

 

I think i did alright, even tough didnt last long and couldnt stay hard for too long, it was ups and downs which sucked and i think it was because it was a mix of nerveousness and the condom.. i dont think it was good for her but it wasnt terrible either. She seemed happy afterwords so who knows. It wasnt a big deal tbh but im wondering if she was able to tell it was my first, not that it matters now.

 

Now you have to practice lasting longer. Just when you think you are going to explode, relax
You can practice that alone choking your chicken.

 

If you don't use it you will lose it. What are u waiting for. The fun is free and natural.

 

Age of virginity…
I knew a woman who were still a virgin at age 40 and she met her future husband who also was a virgin slightly older than her.
An old friend of mine was older than you when he had sex for the first time. My point is, so what.

on to you specifically. I would have liked to find your post many days ago.
I would have told you to be fully open with her.
If your partner is a kind and open minded woman she would be helpful and help you a lot instead of you fumbling your way through. But what is done is done, however maybe my comment will be helpful for someone else if someone likes my opinion.
Everybody needs to start somewhere and might as well get the help you need to get the most out of your first experience.

confession here. I was very shy, intimidated and not confident when it came to going past the next phase when talking with girls. And I was hard on myself, afraid that I deserved someone because all I had in mind was sex. So what did I do?? I started with prostitutes
It took the physical mystery out of the equation for the how to. Even though I didn’t know how to please a woman yet until I met my future wife who also was a young virgin.
I figured out a lot of things for her and with her, and things became good on their own overtime. If you repeated having sex I am sure you noticed improvements in your knowledge and performance. It keeps getting better. I would also almost beg you to please ask your partner to tell you and show you what she likes. It goes a very long way. I have always asked. And I have always told.

I am curious whether you tried different things because you were asking if you should pull the foreskin or not in the condom.
I would have told you not to worry about that and let things happen without fuss. Over time you will be able to try different things. Different methods.

Another VERY important advice in my opinion, don’t rely on porn to learn about sex!! Things in porn or hyped up and staged, a lot of fake.
But if you want to use porn to get ideas and talk about them with your partner, nothing wrong about that as you discover.
Always try different things for your partner for discovering what works or what doesn’t. Don’t limit your imagination. If you keep finding things that turns her on you will drive her wild

I hope I don’t come across as lecturing you. Rather that I like sharing my experience to help another guy