USED UP I really am getting tired Of this flavor of the week routine I question how much longer I can put my heart up to be Hired out by these men Yes while I am there with them I am present Forget so completely in those moments How good last weeks flavor tasted Pretend that all that time was not wasted Because I would not be led here to the newest Without the latest In some way rejecting or being rejected by me So I present myself Over and over and over Play the players, the nice boys, And every kind in between Because I refuse to be seen In the light they want to see I don't play mommy well Hell instead I spread my legs Because I like sex Wait, lets be perfectly honest I really, really love sex Yes, Yes, YES! You could say I'm easy Maybe even sleazy Torn up driven crazy By emotions I refuse to acknowledge Because I can't stop Fucking these men All of them beautiful Handsome creations And I love them all I LOVE THEM ALL But what happens now This latest flavor I really like where he begins And where I end And oh shit, I'm getting too close I want to run Hide, just be away Because I am afraid Of screwing this up Fucking it and twisting it And ruining it I internalize all of this Because, because, because All my excuses The no waits, buts, and pleases Add up here Formulaic recipe for disaster Math doesn't work for the either I know I manifest The no boyfriend rule I fear that old man reality Not that I can't love That One Love is real I am ruling my own destiny here Forgetting all my fear Of reciprocation or unreciprocation Pieces of me falling off edges Slipping over lost ideals of relationship. Untitled Dialing numbers Randomly finding American androids Robotically filling Their time and space continuum With consumption related activities National demographics Prove the patriotic obsession with Being entertained Tragedy dawning and Nobody can seem to Own their own entertainment process Day in Day out They suckle at the teat Of black boxes Flashing Big Brother images Between insipid, mind numbing Life stealing (or is it living) Programming.
