Things Real Men Never Do

Consume warm milk. In or on anything.
Wash their hands after a piss.
Notice other people's shoes.
Use hair styling products.
Eat quiche, obviously.
Give a fuck about whether their peers think they're real men or not.

Anyone think of any more?

 

I've moved twice in the past year. Once was moving out of an ex boyfriend's house and the other was moving out of a house I shared with a male roommate. Neither of them lifted a finger to help me move. They watched me move heavy box after heavy box and didn't offer to help.

So I think a real man always offers to help do heavy lifting.

 

The very first time I ever ate a chick out I followed up with a glass of warm milk. Bad choice...

"I wash my hands before I take a piss. I know where my dick's been."

-Don King

Unless they're really cool boots, but otherwise, I agree.

Definitely

Hell no, I love quiche. Especially after sex...

Got that right

Real men don't wear girls jeans

Real men don't hold their woman's purse

Real men eat red meat

Real men don't like fancy restaurants

Real men wear plaid

"Real men curse and sweat and drink." - Bill Hicks

 

Real men go to the woods not to get away, but to become manly again

Real men don't hit women

Real men don't shave their beards because their women tell them to

Real men use sledge hammers

 

i sit down to pee

 

Real men pee standing up

 

real women realize that real men have beards.

 

Real men protect those weaker than themselves.

Real men still open doors for women, whether they say thank you or not.

Real men don't start fights, they only finish them.

Real men aren't proud of how many women they've had, but how many come back for more.

Real men know how to dance.

 

Good one!

Real men have hit at least one home run at some point in their life

Real men don't use bandaids

Real men don't drink light beer!

Real men don't expect the woman to pay

 

real men never lick their own nipples

 

Just realised the thread title is Things Real Men Never Do. D'oh!

Real Men never take a day off work because they've caught a cold.


Which I think leaves just me outta this whole forum. I'm super badass when it comes to pain or illnesses. I don't even get my mouth numbed when I go to the dentist.

 

1:16

https://www.youtube.com/watch?v=xlMtY8BXhaA"]YouTube - Bill Hicks on dance clubs

 

real men realize that true strength comes from being in touch with the emotional side of life.

 

Real men don't play sports that involve a lot of grab ass

Real men don't take advil, they drink whisky instead

Real men know that Smoking Joe Fraizer really won the Thrilla in Manilla, not Muhammad Ali

 

Real men don't worry about the criteria that 'qualifies' them as real men.

 

Real men don't steal people's answers +_+

 

Real men wouldn't post in this thread.

 

Love ya man! Hahah

 

Good call sir.

 

Waxing their chest/ass/shaving legs/plucking eyebrows