The Hypocrisy Behind The Cult of Good Vibes

Yeah, who's to say what's positive and what's negative? Once I heard someone talking about how God didn’t answer the prayers of the parents of the nine million children who die each year. They contended that God's inaction is not a positive thing. However, I believe that such thinking could be said to be shortsighted. For instance, let's look at the hypothetical case of little five year old Jimmy who fell prey to some terrible disease and then bit the dust despite his parents’ prayers for his recovery. Well, little did they know what God knew.

What God knew was that little Jimmy would have grown up to have a little farm on which he would have raised geese. So, one Sunday, one of his big geese--the really mean one--would get loose. And as it so happens, a Sunday School bus carrying thirty-four children would be passing by Jimmy’s farm one Sunday morning. The bus’s air conditioner isn’t working, and, being an especially hot day, the driver would have her side-window wide open. When the bus stops at an intersection in front of Jimmy’s place, the goose, because of her goslings, would see the bus as some kind of a threat, and as the bus is gaining speed after leaving the intersection, the goose would fly into the open window and go at the driver. She would inadvertently hit the gas pedal, and before you can say WTF--or more appropriately in this case, OMG--the bus would smash into a bridge abutment, burst into flames, and kill twenty-seven of the children and terribly disfigure the rest of them.

Grown up Jimmy would hear the crash and then run to the scene. Having been thrown through the windshield, the goose and driver are lying in the ditch, both dead. Jimmy recognizes his goose, and, smelling a lawsuit, or worse, grabs the goose and runs farther down the road and throws it into the water-filled ditch. He finds a rock and places it on the dead goose’s body. Suddenly the final scene in the movie “Deliverance” pops into his head, and he quickly finds another, way bigger rock and puts it on the dead goose under the water. Then he runs back to his house and calls the police about the wreck.

Anyway, just because you can’t see the bigger picture doesn’t mean God can’t. The life of Jimmy as a child versus the lives of thirty-four Christians fourteen years later. And Jimmy wasn’t even a Christian! In fact, besides having a farm, Jimmy would have also gone onto internet debate forums and ridicule nag Christians about biblical inconsistencies. For God, it was a no-brainer; Jimmy had to go.

As an aside, just before the bus tragedy that would have happened, that same goose would have gotten loose before the church bus tragedy and flog an innocent kitten to death. And that kitten would have grown up to kill the rat that carried the disease that devastated the whole community . . . including Christian children!! But God, being all-knowing, allowed for Jimmy’s demise, which prevented the goose, which prevented the bus accident, and the kitten lived to kill the rat, which prevented the disease. So . . .

 

Okay, you're making me feel positive now. So, feeling positive, I decide to take a walk down the road. But this just happens to be the day that my neighbor runs out of cigarettes and chooses to drive to the store . . . DRUNK!! And you know the rest of the story.

 

Your neighbor wouldn't happen to be little Jimmy, would he?

 

YES! And both little Jimmy--big drunk Jim now--and myself would end up dead, thereby allowing God to have killed two bad birds with one stone.

 

I think your version'd be way better.

 

So, positive outcome after all...

 

Yeah, if you're God I guess. But all I ever did was mention some inconsistencies in his book. It's not my fault his editor didn't catch them. He should send little Jimmy after his editor, not me. This just proves that he really does work in mysterious ways.

 

When you're down and out, positive people are really annoying.

 

You're one of them Tyrsonwood? Say it ain't so. Hard to believe since you live alone in the woods.

 

Oh hell no...

 

there's still new age hippie types these days? i've been encountering fewer and fewer it seems like. you sure as hell don't get the dumbass kids on hipforums that used to join daily and embarrass themselves.

 

Apparently, I live with at least two. Still not past judgment but love conquers all right man? Fuck

 

Sometimes in your other posts you come across quite hippie. Be careful. I know old habits die hard...

 

Surely the that's BEST way to become more positive! I've definitely felt more positive since living in an isolated place with no human neighbours.

 

Nope that's just my ol' taoist principles showin' through

 

Okay. I didn't mean to jibe.

 

No jibe here just an assload of bullshit mixed with copious amounts of pot & a frustratin' lack of coffee

 

When I read the original post I can't help but wonder "Why do you give a shit how other people think?"
Seriously, why do you feel compelled to nag about some hippy philosophy that doesn't affect you?
Why are you compelled to pass judgement over the most trivial of actions by other people?
Seems petty to me.

Might I remind you of a famous quote by an early hippy (and extreme liberal): "Let he who is free from sin cast the first stone."

 

And right after he said it, his mother rushed forward and started throwing rocks.