The Addict is a man, not unlike yourself. The Addict is looked down upon, but the Addict is a man, not unlike yourself. The Addict is poor, but the Addict is a man, not unlike yourself. The Addict needs his fix, but the Addict is a man, not unlike yourself. The Addict is more than a man, unlike yourself. The Addict is stronger than most men, unlike yourself. The Addict stares shame and embarrassment in the face, unlike yourself. The Addict pays for his mistakes richously, unlike yourself. The Addict is secure and competent in hellish states, unlike yourself.
instead of telling us what an addict is, try showing us what an addict is through an action a particular addict does. it will make the poem stronger, i'm positive about that. finding an action or event that communicates a bigger idea is always stronger than just stating the idea. good start
While I appreciate your constructive feedback, this isn't about the life of the Addict, this is about the essence of the Addict. This isn't a story about a particular addict, nor is it a story of many. It is representative of all of the men and woman who face trouble with drug addiction. Thus, I cannot give this representative addict an action. I can only give him the representative essence of what these men and woman's life has build them up to be.
but you can get to the essence of an addict by showing something an addict does or something that happens to an addict. thats far more powerful, not only because you're reader can figure what the essence of an addict is on his/her own, but also because once the reader does that itll stick with him/her longer. also i hope you have already come out of your addiction or are in the process of it, i was addicted to heroin for a long while and then coke for about the same amount of time. it sucks, but if you can pull yourself out of it you are deffinatly stronger for it
I am in the process of it. I was really badly addicted to opium. Snorting everyday for a year. I'm done with opium, but now I'm facing a helluva hard time with withdrawal and find my self drinking a bit too much Maneshevitz
Addiction isn't cool. I think mine (had several) were helpful for me in the long run. I went through some bad times, and it was no ones fault but my own. But I ended up dropping most everything and decided I could never take real life for granted again by constantly seeking to escape. I can relate with this poem, thats for sure. anyway thanks, and remember, when you get life right, there is no need to escape. its perfect. The Universe basically gives you unlimited chances to succeed in this life, its only you who can hold yourself back. Withdrawal is hell, but you can make it through. It won't last forever. Don't resent people who haven't had struggles like you have. You should be happy for them. Basically, just try to keep your negative feelings about yourself and others to a minimum. Concentrate on all the good stuff in your life/others lives, because for one this is the way to be at peace and of sound mind, and it DEFINITELY does not help for an addict to get worked up about stuff/linger on negative things. We sought relief and comfort from our addictions so when bad things come up, we are more likely to resort back to them. Good luck. Bust mostly, thanks for the poem.
what a sad story...you guys at 15 and 20 years of age (if they are your real ages) and already recovering addicts? man, i've had my struggles with substance, but damn.... as for the poem, be careful when using "you/yourself" in poetry because you dont know who your readers are and what they're stuggles have been...the last stanza of this poem really turned me off cuz i have never been an "addict" in the sense you're talking, but i know all about having to be stronger than most, staring shame in the face, paying for mistakes, and having to act secure in hellish states... (and i really dont think "richously" is a word)
