thats sooo gay MERGED

Does it irritate you when some ppl. use the term 'gay' as an insult? For example, "like, oh my god, that is soooo gay." PPl. who say those things really piss me off like there's no tomorrow. Yet, a lot of ppl. say it often & they don't even know (& probably don't even care) that a gay or lesbian person could be right near them. How do you ppl. feel about this? Would you be insulted? Should you (or did you) say something to someone who used 'gay' as an insult?

 

Doesn't that piss you the hell off?!? I hear that ALLL DAY at school! Sometimes I get this really serious mean look on my face (I'm usually really smiley and friendly and sweet), and say really sternly "DON'T use the word 'gay' to describe something you DON'T like." Usually it shuts them up, at least for a little one

 

This pisses me off to no end. See posts 17 thru 19 HERE!

 

Let me try that again. See post 17 thru 20 on THIS THREAD.

 

Yeah, ppl. use the word gay to describe all sorts of things (like medicine?!) which makes no sense at all. And another thing: using the word 'retarded.' That would offend me b/c my uncle had a severe learning disabilty. And ppl. spurt these words out all the time without any consideration, especially young ppl. b/c some of them just don't know that they could be insulting someone else. btw, I'm not trying to bash on young ppl. here; but a lot of homophobic jerks at my former high school said these types of things all the time.

 

Exactly, imagine if I were to say "That cereal is ******." I would NEVER, NEVER say anything like that, but it is the exact same thing.

 

I gotta say you're right there. But a lot of people who say that something is "gay" are not in any respect referring to actual gay people or trying in any way to insult them. And it really does suck that phrases like "that's retarded" or "that's so gay" are so coomon place now. But just try to remeber that most people (sorry that is a generalization, I mean most people I know, or am friends with, but anyway alot of people) don't mean to be so rude they've just never been confronted about how the slang they use can actually hurt people.

 

I have people that do that around me (out of habit, unfortunately) and I'll look right into their eyes....and say...it certainly is quite STRAIGHT..emphasizing that word...


That usually embarasses them to at least look at their language.

 

Apparenty it's being added to the OED with that meaning. Weird, no?

 

Hell yeah, I hate it, I get all worked up over it (and this was before I even knew I was bisexual).

I had a HUGE rant about it in my blog a couple of months ago, if you're interested, it has all my thoughts on the subject:

http://theworldofdan.co.uk/blogger/2004/04/correct-usage-for-word-gay.html

 

That's a real shame, but I can understand why. I hope it's listed as a slang term, and not one that's 'acceptable'...

 

TO be honest, I really don't find it offensive...I find it quite rude and negligent, but I have a theory with situations like these- Usually you won't truly respect it unless you've experienced it.
If you've got a deaf relative, chances are that you probably won't use the term in any sarcastic form, such as, "Are you DEAF???"
Here's a little story-
My brother, his friend, and myself were having a conversation on many different topics, and at one point, my brother made a sarcastic remark about seizures....You know, something like, "Yeah, like you're on the floor having many seizures..." When he said that comment, his friend immediately replied saying, "That's not funny, because ever since my grandma had her tumor, she's been getting seizures...." Now, his reaction to the comment is very understanding, but knowing that he's not innocent himself in other areas, I replied saying, "Well, would you have said that before your grandmother was sick?" He didn't respond, and kinda shook it off.

The same thing goes when people use the term "gay" or "faggot" or any other lifestyle remarks that are used in its inappropriate terms, whether its directed as an offensive comment or to describe something...But I'm sure they'll change their tune as well if they've come to experience the gay lifestyle, gradually learning to respect it in its appropriate term.

But here's a question I've got-
How do you feel when gay people use the term faggot or gay themselves to imply something? Surely, I've witnessed this...Even I have used the terms inappropriately like once in a blue moon...

 

LogsOnSticks, I understand what you mean, and where you're coming from, and fully agree with you, but I believe that the word in case (gay) is a bit diffrent to the examples you have used.

By talking about something being like having a seizure, it's using it as a discriptive word. In the same way as you might describe a colour as being 'as red as the sun at sunset', or something like that. Sure, it's disrespectful to people who suffer from seizures, and I'm not saying that it's right.. but at least it's more accurate that people who use the word gay as an insult.

"Oh that movie was gay" - oh right, so the movie started fucking some guy up the ass did it?

It's not even in the same general area, it's a totally unfounded, assoctation, and (as has been suggested before), it doing nothing but fueling, even if the person who used the word didn't mean to.

I used to go around using the word 'retarded' a lot, I don't anymore, for the same reason.

 

Actually, that did happen once... my friend who is gay said 'that is so gay.' And he knows I'm bi (or as I call it "half lesbian") so I was offended when he said that. So I asked him why he said that (being that he's gay). Apparently, it doesn't bother him. And then I kinda had a quizzicle expression for the rest of the evening... meh..

 

lol I know, the seizure situation isn't the best example, but it still proves what I believe.
Sometimes people won't understand how we feel unless we express ourselves. I'm not saying that a therapy session should occur, but if people are willing to listen to our feelings, they'll embrace it. The same goes for the inappropriate use of the "gay" term...
Life is a matter of learning from eachother...We're all ignorant in many different ways...I'm sure that everyone here, including myself, could react to a situation or a term more respectfully...In this case, its anger over people using "gay" innapropriately...Thats why its our job to teach those people to respect it in its appropriate form...Humans aren't always independent, we need to be dependent upon eachother sometimes, and you need to realize that.
Again, usually its a matter of experience before we respect it...And through that, its takes learning and understanding...

 

Reclamation, innit? I say it all the time, just because I find it funny. I prefer faggy to gay though. The fact is, most people who say it aren't actually homophobic, it's just that they're used to it. Homophobia isn't the same as not wanting to be gay - who does, really? - but I find most people are fairly tolerant, but still use the word in that context because they're used to it. Most of them apologise to me if they do, I just tell them that I don't mind and they're generally OK. You can't demand that people change, but you can at least appreciate it when they try, even if they get it wrong.

 

One of my best mates is asian. His family is from india (Sikh). He and I slag each other off all the time (as all good friends do ), and within this context, there is almost no limit to what we can say and slag off, and that includes things like each others culture and religion, eating habbits, whatever... but that's only because we're good mates, and know what the boundries are. That does not mean I'm going to goto other Sikhs and say the same things.. that would be disrespectful.

It's the same with the gay issue, if my friend wanted to take the piss out of me because of my bisexuality, thats fine, because I know he's joking, and he's my mate. But it's a totally diffrent story when someone you don't know does it (and even then out of context). It's disrespectful.

It's like the N word, if black people want to use it (to reclaim it, to take its power away), then that's great, it's up to them, but it does not give anyone else the right to use it, because of what the word means, and what it symbolises.

 

White folks can't use "******" an straight folks can't use "gay". An, anyways, language is a constantly changing thing. 'Faggot' used to mean a bundle of kindling, and now it's a derogatory term fer gay people. I've only used the word 'fag' twice, an both times it's been to describe this one person who I absolutely loath. No other word I know can connotate this persons absolute disgustingness of character. He's cruel, he hits on all the chicas, and he thinks he's the coolest while doin all this shit. I don't think of gay folks as 'fags' or anything. It's evolved from sticks to homosexual to someone morally-bankrupt. Same as 'gay', it's evolved from happy to homo to stupid. An, really, 's jus a fucking word, anyway.

So, in conclusion, evil, nasty people are fags, gay people are gay, but not gay-stupid, and monkeys will sooner or later fly out of my butt.

 

faggot...was actually a bundle of kindling placed under a stake with a person tied to it and set a blaze as a form punishment in the middle ages...guess who those people were...gays, witches, anyone who was viewed as socially flawed in the eyes of the church...joan of arc was burned at the stake...the term just kind of transferred itself to the dude(tte) kabobed to the stake.

as for this whole "Gay" as a negative term...i personally hate it when it is used in a way that is meant to be hurtful..whether concious or unconcious, people who say this usually have a problem with homosexuality...on the otherhand...said in jest it doesn't bother me...i mean...i completely support freedom of speech but there is a responsibility with that right...when people disregard thier responibility to treat people fairly...that's when i get hurt/upset.

 

Hey, didja know that flippin someone the bird came about when during one of the English-French wars, when English archers were captured, their middle fingers were amputated so that they couldn't shoot anymore, so when French soldiers passed them in their cells, they held up their middle fingers to taunt them. God, I have a wealth of useless information.