THATS MY SHiT

i ONLY SMOKE POT. THiNKiNG ABOUT TRYiNG ACiD OR MUSHROOMS. BUT i PERSONALY THiNK THAT WEED CALMS PEOPLE DOWN. BUT SOME PEOPLE CAN GET REALLY PARANOiD WHEN THERE HiGH.

 

COOL!

 

wow.... I hate the way you spell..... its seriously makes me want to punch babies... god help me if im in a nursery

 

^^haha(you must love Dane as much as me), yeah what with the all caps shit except the letter "i" thats pretty annoying

 

damn someone nedds to smoke more..


or therapy
relax dude

& yea i agree pots all u need...

 

if u ever type in 90 % all caps again, ill end u

 

Yes... he will end you... (with a Glock 17 Norwegian army issued P80 and a super soaker)

 

dont worry i dont think hes serious, hes just semi-quoting the stand-up comedian Dane Cook.

 

Haha... everyone is like... discovering Dane Cook these days.

I've always been more of a Demetri Martin/Mitch Hedberg/Andy Kaufman kind of guy.

I was going to have my teeth whitened, but then I said Fuck that, I'll just get a tan instead.

I bought a house, it's a two-bedroom house. But I think it's up to me how many bedrooms there are, don't you? Fuck you, real estate lady, this bedroom has an oven in it. This bedroom has a lot of people sitting around watching TV. This bedroom is over in that guy's house. "Sir, you've got one of my bedrooms, are you aware? Don't decorate it!

But I got to smoke fake pot with Peter Frampton. That's a cool story. It's as cool as smoking real pot with a guy who looks like Peter Frampton. I've done that way more.

- The Mitch

One of my friends has a stutter and a lot of people think that’s a bad thing, but to me that’s just like starting certain words with a drum roll. That’s not an impediment, that’s suspense! What’s he going to say? Car?? …or Carnival?? …Carburetor!?!? Man…

I wrapped my Christmas presents early this year, but I used the wrong paper. See, the paper I used said ‘Happy Birthday’ on it. I didn’t want to waste it so I just wrote ‘Jesus’ on it.

Some jokes are short and elegant, like a mathematical proof or a midget in a ballgown


- Demetri Martin

If I play my cards right, I could bring network wrestling back to TV. Unfortunately, to most people, wrestling is a laughingstock. But fortunately, I'm reaching people who otherwise wouldn't watch.

What's real? What's not? That's what I do in my act, test how other people deal with their reality.

I never told a joke in my life.
- Andy Kaufman

 

why are you shouting? speak like a civilised being not a crazy noob

 

yeah Dane Cook isnt my favorite comedian. but ive been a fan since his first appearance on comedy central presents.

but i usually like my stand-up kinda intelligent like my favorite, Bill Hicks (RIP). i also like Mitch (RIP), and i really love George Carlin. my four loves in life are weed, pussy, music, and stand-up comedy.

 

I like it how it's obvious how the caps lock is on and he holds shift for the letter "i" regardless if he's talking about himself or not. A good "LOL" right there

To answer however, I only do things that come somewhat naturally from the earth, In otherwords I'd do mushrooms but not acid. I dropped acid a few times and I'd rather not have closed eye visuals like I had before. The only benefit from acid is that I kick ass at Guitar Hero

 

if yall fuckers dont leave me alone..ya happy im typing in lowercase...damnit!!!!

 

arty:

 

dont you ever fucking type in caps again

:happybday

 

dane cook is a fuckin hack. he rips off louis C.K. all the time

 

that wierd cuz everone tells me that^^ i like louis ck and ive not noticed the ripoff. ive seen ppl ripoff Bill Hicks all the time, but thats ok. you cant expect everyone to have a constant barrage of original material that impossible. and besides dane cook has a totally different way of telling his jokes than ck and ppl are just pissed because hes more popular. all stand up comics have borrowed bits from other comics at one time or another. so dont take it so personally

 

http://thatvideosite.com/video/3972

 

iF i WANNA TYPE LiKE THiS i WiLL SO DONT TRY TO BiTCH ME. but i wont for those who were respectful.

 

amateur hour