Taking the plunge on a threesome

After many years of marriage we are going to take the plunge into a threesome.
We have talked about it during foreplay for a while but we have now discussed it properly and openly about any concerns.

I'm so excited about it and can't wait for it to happen now. I hope it works out as nice as we have always imagined.

 

Congrats. MMF or FFM?

 

FFM, I would do MMF too but my husband is not keen

 

Well it's great you guys and talk it out and enjoy what you two like.

 

Most threesomes, I have learned are MMF, and the female is the wife of one of the men involved. There are several reasons and one of the most obvious is that one male cannot service two females in the way they want and need. To be blunt, after he has cum once, he has to rest a while before he can "perform" again. In some of these situations, the women "service" each other while he is resting. And, the two of them can also service him together. But, in most cases, a man cannot fuck a woman to completion, then turn to the other and fuck her just as well.

I was only in one of these FFM threesomes, in which my wife offered me to her friend, to fuck her. My wife was there and we were all naked. While I fucked her friend, I got my wife into position where I could eat her pussy! I don't know who really came first, but it seemed that we all came at the same time. It was a very different experience for me, to feel my cock exploding in this other Lady's ****, at the same time that she was grabbing at my cock, from deep within. AND, my wife came to orgasm at the same time while my tongue was frantically "eating" her lovely hairy pussy! It was a once-in-a-lifetime experience for the three of us!!!

 

That's just your experience, SOJ. In my dealings and observations, the opposite has been true. It seems easier to get men to agree to a situation where there are a lot men and one woman, and they each take turns. It seems easier to get two MF couples together. It seems really difficult and less common for one woman to convince two men to lay with her at once. This seems to be because this forces too much closeness and intimacy upon the men, even if they have no sexual contact with each other. I have heard personally from men, and read in forums from men that they'd rather not risk bumping dicks with another guy. I have heard and read from men that they do not believe they can be hard with another erection nearby. I have observed men refusing the competition. For example, a dude I was seeing was okay to fuck me with his buddy, but when his buddy wanted to be able to reach me without him as a middleman, he was never invited to play with us again. He used to fuck this other woman with that buddy too, but she told me after that incident where he asked for my number, he wasn't allowed to play with the two of them anymore either because our mutual friend would not allow it.

I have been to a lot of adult events and venues in the NYC and Miami metro areas. Those places are largely where I made my observations. I have been non-monogamous for 5 or 6 of the last 10 years. I have participated in large, active forums where sexual discussion is the focus for the last ten years. From there my observations and experience has also been derived. I understand that your mileage varies, but I would be hesitant to assume that my experience can be used to extrapolate trends to the point where I could say "most threesomes" anything. I am aware of selection bias, and the fact that my sample size is vast, but my sample is not randomized. I would caution you not to make over-generalizations.

In the FMF and MFF threesomes in which I participated, the male was usually the primary partner of one of the females. Only with two of the men with whom I did that were there no strings attached. In one case, I wanted to cheer up a female friend of mine by getting her laid by a really hot guy who was a great lay. He didn't find her particularly attractive, and agreed to let me "give him to her" as a gift if I would stay and play. To this day he is reluctant to have me introduce him to women after that. I thought she was really pretty, even though she could stand a bit of waxing. Oh well. The other case was a friend of mine who was a friend with benefits; we did a lot of swinging together. One other FWB and I could just never seem to make it happen. He had originally picked me up with the hopes of getting me to have a threesome with him and another woman he was seeing. Though she and I really clicked and became close friends, we never did do the deed. They broke up before we could. Now he's always telling me I stole his girl. In all other cases, the dude involved was my boyfriend, or I was the spice added to some couple's sex life. Since I am named after a spice, I cannot tell you how many times THAT has actually been said to me in jest.

What I have seen more than anything else is a line of men, waiting to fuck some willing woman, one at a time, at a party. Only once have I ever thought "That woman is too drunk to consent." I checked on her to make sure she was into the scene, and she told me to go fuck myself. LOL

 

Have been in both MFM and FFM. My wife loved both, I often felt more in the way in the FFM, because a couple of the ladies were more into my wife than me. But in the end my wife always wanted me. In the MFM it was 2 guys pleasing the one female, not always my wife. My wife claimed every woman should have at least one MFM threesome.

 

Hope you have the other woman lined up, because finding the other girl is no easy task! You are competing with tons of other couples looking for the same thing.

 

Hopefully, your wife will supply the third.

 

I am the wife.
I never anticipated the difficulty in actually finding someone so yeah, it may never happen.

 

It can be very tough to find someone that meets standards of both the husband and wife. A couple I knew wanted to have a 3some and they agreed to have 1 MFM and 1 FMF. Well the husband did not want to find a guy that had a larger cock then he and was not in better shape. Well the guys they found the wife was not attracted to them. So when they were looking for a woman wife didn't want anyone prettier then her and women she found husband was not attracted to. Husband "sucked it up" and they did have a FMF.

 

People like that should not be getting into the lifestyle! You can be with someone else as long as they don't have a big dick and they are ugly! Clearly these people are insecure and not in the right frame of mind to be playing with others.

 

They said they wanted to be attracted to the other people and yes both were insecure thinking the partner might want the other person more. Think it was more of a hey lets do it because we can.

 

Hi Secret Fantasies, sorry about that. Obviously I didn't figure out you are female. It's very weird the first few minutes, but that wears off quickly once everyone is naked and touching each other. Who wants a threesome more? ...you, or your man? (That's just my curiosity asking.)Sincerely, good luck!

 

Hi Secret Fantasies. How's the search going?

 

We aren't actively looking at the moment.

 

OK Good Luck when you do.

 

@Mocha Mood, Devil's Advocate:

It's harder to orchestrate an ffm than an mmf. Bisexual women are often suspicious of women corralling them into threesomes with their boyfriends. It seems bi-trendy. It seems like it's just done strictly to impress the boyfriend. Meanwhile a lot of men are easy, and while they would likely prefer being with two women, they'll take what they can get. Some of them like the whole bromance vibe and the camaraderie of mutually "degrading" a woman.

 

Taking the plunge on a threesome
I learned to count more than two

 

...degrading a woman? I suppose. There are all types out there. For me however, the MFM threesomes that I have been involved in, were for the erotic pleasure of all involved. The first woman I did MFM threesomes with jumped at the opportunity. She didn't feel degraded in the least. I was pleasantly surprised. So, it's not about degrading women for many of us; it's about being Very Sexual with others who are loooking for the same type of erotic encounter. Try a MFM threesome with two men who care about you, and maybe even love you, and see how pleasurable it can be.