Substratum Dream

Discussion in 'Poetry' started by EternalHunter, Oct 23, 2005.

  1. EternalHunter

    EternalHunter Member

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    In a night of vestigial heartbeats,

    when the moon

    coiled like brittle ropes

    around the towers

    of the night

    I heard golden rumors

    that melted like

    liquid ore and

    were forgotten

    in whispers of

    vermilion shadow

    laced too thickly

    across the twilight.



    Desperate hands

    reached uniformly through

    the strata of curly,

    languid harpies

    and the heaviness, the

    sweet decay of pounds

    of flowers and stems

    it was them again that

    took the hardest fall.



    You, balcony, a hard

    heart later, you

    crawled up to me,

    and I leaned on the

    firmness of your ledge,

    dreading the waking

    of reality, as Morning Glories

    twined around me,

    a heavy golden cream of

    necessity,

    and we tumbled

    arm in arm into the garden.
     
  2. Major Peacenik

    Major Peacenik Member

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    fuckin sweet
    overpowering
     
  3. osiris

    osiris Senior Member

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    Voluptuous; rapture. :)
     
  4. EternalHunter

    EternalHunter Member

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  5. fulmah

    fulmah Chaser of Muses

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    I've been reading it a few times a day, over the last few days, trying to comment but getting distracted by the cubicle world... finally, a chance opened...

    I liked the surreal imagery you used (petals, petals, everywhere), how it gave an elusive nature to the whole piece... like I get pictures of a scene, yet they're all skewed like a drunken, or even repressed event. This piece shines, to me. Thanks for sharing it, been missing your presence (or presents) of late!

     
  6. Hippievixen

    Hippievixen Lifetime Supporter Lifetime Supporter

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    damn, it almost gave me an orgasm!

    i loved it.

    especially,

    "Desperate hands

    reached uniformly through

    the strata of curly,

    languid harpies

    and the heaviness, the

    sweet decay of pounds

    of flowers and stems

    it was them again that

    took the hardest fall."
     
  7. sylvanlightning

    sylvanlightning Prismatic Essence

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    Such beautiful chorded breaths of inspiration
    interlaced as delicate and heavy soaring hues.
    I loved the whole work.
     
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