What do you all do when you're stuck in a rut? Lately I've been feeling unappreciated, unwanted, and just simply a big failure, in almost every aspect of my life. Work, school, relationships, family...it seems like I can't do anything right...and I almost have no desire to continue any of it. Any advice?
It depends how long I've been stuck in the rut. This last time was a couple of months and just recently I called my Doctor and got on a low dose of medication. I realize that isn't the answer for everyone but for me it's helping bring me out of my depression so I can get moving again. There have been times I've gone back to therapy. That helps give a different perspective if you don't feel like you have anyone to talk with. Have you been eating/sleeping okay? Remember it's just a rut and it will pass.
When I'm stuck in a rut like that I just keep telling myself that it's a passing phase, and that I'm going to feel better. Life is full of ups and downs. You have done so much, and you are anything but a failure!
What to do when stuck in a rut hmm... I like to do something indulgent or something that i've wanted to do for a long time perhaps, but have resisted for whatever reason... (whether the reason is money, or being 'responsible' etc..) Not much to be done about family often, but as far as relationships, well if you're in one, go spank whoever your partner is for letting you get to the point of feeling as if you're being taken for granted. I'm actually taking some of the above advice myself, this very week, for a very similiar ailment. ("rut-itis") If you're one of those very positive people you could say that it's always an opportunity to build up internal energy for positive change. If there's something you want to add or reduce from your life, it can be a good time to take action.
I haven't really been sleeping very well...I wake up random times during the night. I think it has to do with stress. It's gotten to the point where I don't even feel like having sex with my partner anymore. I don't feel desired, or sexy, or anything. And it has nothing to do with him! I am very in love with him and for the most part he treats me with respect and dedication. Everything in my life just FEELS crappy.
Hey mama ,, I know the feeling,,, I've been in a funk too for a long time,,, I came to oklahoma ,, got married,,we went homeless,,,everything i owned got burned,, I have to wear my husbands clothes,,and thats not pretty,,lol,,, and theres a whole lot more,,, but the thing is ,,, it passes.... Stuff gets way better,, you just gotta keep moving and find something to help lift you up,,,Put yourself first for awhile and if anyones gotta problem with it,,, well then they just dont understand how important you are, keep lookin up,,
This too shall pass.... just remember that. Also, I give myself a manicure with a buffer and some oil. It's just a small pick me up. I don't feel sexy either anymore, but it's always nice to have pretty nails for some strange reason. I got the idea from legally blonde and as stupid as it sounds.. it helps. Actually I'm gunna go watch that right now, just cause it cheers me up.
when i started feeling like that i went on antidepressants. pretty big deal for me, bc i'm very anti-pharma. anyways, hope things turn around for you soon
When you say unappreciated from all angles of your life, that doesnt mean you are performing subpar. Don't depend on external validation to feel successful.. judge yourself and let your motivation come from within.
Let's see...the first time I felt stuck in a rut was during college. I slept a lot, hated on myself, felt like general shit. So I evaluated where I was and what I TRULY wanted. That's when I went on a much needed travelling session. I landed my lucky ass here with someone that geniunely cares about my spirit and well-being. The first, it seems, since my momma. The last time was just about a month ago. I felt like crap. I didn't feel sexual or meaningful. I just felt like a baby-harvester. And I talked it over with Brian. I layed out every single meaningless thought in my head, even the incoherent ones. And brian listened to the whole jumble and hugged me and made a couple simple suggestions that might make me feel better. And soon, I did start to feel better. *hugs* Hon, it will pass. Remember, like in the post above: THIS TOO SHALL PASS!
Yeah, that's what I keep telling myself... I mean, my life isn't THAT bad, but it's just a bit stressful...that's why I can't figure out why I'm feeling terrible.
From what I remember hearing about your family, you have every right to be stressed and burnt out! Worrying about your parents, your sister, everybody but yourself! Hon, I'd almost say for you to get yourself away from there. I mean, move. So You can learn to focus on yourself...Your family is taking up so much of your thoughts you're forgetting about yourself.
Yeah my family (which is supposed to be a support system) is in pretty terrible shape...and they make me feel pretty bad about myself a lot of time. I wish I could move, but I'm in a position, where I can't...I'm under contract at my work until July and that's becoming more than a forty hour a week job at times...plus going to school full-time...I just don't have time for another job...and since I'm under contract at my work (which is stressful enough at times), I can't quit, unless I want to pay a fee to break it...which is pretty much out of the question... It's a mess, but I graduate in December...so I'm just holding on until then.
Well, until then, start searching yourself and researching on the net places you might like to move to, or see...So once you have the opportunity, you can get the hell out of dodge and be more at peace! Giving yourself something to look forward to helps a whole hell of a lot!
You've probably been thinking about it for a while....just not making a big deal of it like you are now....and now that you've let yourself feel bad, it just came all at once. Try getting away and having some YOU time. With no one around but you. Do something you love. When I'm down on myself real bad and feel like just giving up, I go away for about 4 days and just do art, write, sing, dance....anything that makes me happy. I feel a lot better and can get back to my life and be happy. Swing your troubles away....go to a park and swing. Close your eyes and pretend the world away. It helps if you can't get away for a long period of time.
